As a woman that has gone through something like this for years with someone that makes HUGE money mistakes repeatedly, just do whatever it is she wants you to do before she chokes the life out of you. You say that trust is high, but she is telling you that she does not trust you with money at all and is taking your name off of the accounts. You have to work to earn trust again. Ask for your name to be put back on the accounts if you go six months or so without overspending. Double check with your bank to make sure you can have your checked deposited into an account with only her name on it. And once you are back on the account, I'm begging you, do NOT go back to your old ways. I think that is what sets me off the most. My husband will do something the very second I think that maybe he has finally learned his lesson, and we are right back to where we were. We just started talking to each other today after having a huge fight two weeks ago and he has the nerve to tell me that there is a $1,700 tv at Costco that he wants! This is why his name is not on our online savings account. He didn't like it either, but this is how it is going to be. His name is on the emergency savings account, but he doesn't know the password and doesn't have the debit card to it, and he never will.
I know a $1,700 tv is pretty large compared to what you say you are spending, but the small things add up too. My husband takes $300 out of the ATM every time, and he mindlessly goes back to the ATM whenever he wants cash. There are months when he will take $900 out of our checking account and not write it in the ledger, and not be able to tell me what he spent the money on. He likes to say he spends it on food and gas, but I see those charges on the credit cards that I have to wait until next payday to pay off because there isn't enough money in the checking account!
I wish my husband was as willing to do this as you are. Just being willing to try to improve goes a long way. I really wish you luck and tell your wife that she has a soul sister here!
I know a $1,700 tv is pretty large compared to what you say you are spending, but the small things add up too. My husband takes $300 out of the ATM every time, and he mindlessly goes back to the ATM whenever he wants cash. There are months when he will take $900 out of our checking account and not write it in the ledger, and not be able to tell me what he spent the money on. He likes to say he spends it on food and gas, but I see those charges on the credit cards that I have to wait until next payday to pay off because there isn't enough money in the checking account!
I wish my husband was as willing to do this as you are. Just being willing to try to improve goes a long way. I really wish you luck and tell your wife that she has a soul sister here!
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