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My Spouse Died Over A Year Ago: 10 Clues It’s Time to Move On

May 8, 2024 by Tamila McDonald
Time to Move On Intro
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Losing a spouse is an incredibly painful experience, and everyone’s journey through grief is unique. However, as time passes, you may start to see signs that suggest you’re ready to begin moving forward with your life. Recognizing these clues is not about forgetting your loved one but about allowing yourself to heal and embrace life again. Here are ten significant indicators that it might be time to gently start the process of moving on.

1. You Feel Stronger Moments of Happiness

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Initially, happiness might feel like a distant memory, but as you heal, these moments can become more frequent and intense. If you find yourself laughing more often, enjoying the company of others, and feeling genuinely happy without immediate guilt, it’s a sign that your heart is healing. Enjoying these moments doesn’t diminish the love you had but shows your capacity to cherish and create new memories.

2. Memories Bring Comfort Rather Than Pain

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When thinking of your spouse brings more smiles than tears, it’s a gentle indicator that you’re healing. If you find yourself recounting stories of your loved one with warmth and comfort, rather than just pain and sorrow, this is a profound shift in your journey through grief. It means you’re starting to cherish the bond you shared without it being overshadowed by loss.

3. Increased Energy for Daily Activities

Increased Energy for Daily Activities
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If you notice an increase in your energy levels, especially when it comes to resuming activities you used to enjoy together or on your own, this is a positive sign. This increased vitality may encourage you to take on new hobbies or responsibilities, signaling that you’re regaining your zest for life, an essential part of the healing process.

4. You’re Considering New Relationships

You’re Considering New Relationships
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The thought of dating again can be daunting and even guilt-inducing. However, feeling open to the possibility of new romantic relationships is a significant indicator that you are moving forward. It’s important to move at your own pace and recognize that seeking companionship is a natural human need.

5. Changes in Living Environment Feel Necessary

Changes in Living Environment Feel Necessary
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You might start feeling the need to rearrange or redecorate your home, or even consider moving to a new place. Making these changes can signify your readiness to create a living space that reflects your current emotional state and future aspirations, not just your past.

6. You Have New Plans for the Future

You Have Plans For The Future
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Planning for the future—whether it’s travel, new projects, or career goals—suggests that you are looking ahead and thinking about your life in the long term. This forward-thinking is crucial as it shows you’re beginning to live in the present and make plans for yourself.

7. Holidays and Anniversaries Approach with Less Dread

Holidays and Anniversaries Approach with Less Dread
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As time passes, the anticipation of pain around significant dates may lessen. If you find yourself making plans to celebrate or simply get through these days with less dread and more resilience, it’s a sign of progress in your healing journey.

Over time, you may even find ways to honor your loved one during these occasions, integrating their memory into celebrations in a way that feels healing rather than hurtful. Shifting towards viewing such dates with a new perspective is a crucial part of emotional recovery. It reflects a balancing act between remembrance and moving forward, showing that your emotional resilience is strengthening.

8. You Share Your Experience to Help Others

You Share Your Experience to Help Others
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Finding the strength to share your story and experiences to help others in their times of grief is not only therapeutic but also a sign that you have processed your emotions to a point where you can use them to bring comfort to others. This altruism is a powerful step in moving forward.

9. Reduced Reliance on Support Groups

Reduced Reliance on Support Groups
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While support groups play a crucial role in the grieving process, feeling that you need them less often is an indication that you are starting to regain your emotional independence. It’s healthy to recognize and embrace this newfound strength.

This doesn’t mean you are leaving behind the support network, but rather, you’re finding that your daily life is becoming more manageable on your own. Gradually, as you regain confidence in handling your emotions and situations independently, you may visit these groups more to share your progress and less to seek help, which is a significant step forward in any healing process.

10. You Recognize Your Growth

You Recognize Your Growth
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Acknowledging that you have grown and changed through your grief is perhaps one of the most significant signs that you are ready to move on. This self-awareness is a testament to your resilience and capacity to navigate life’s toughest challenges.

Recognizing your personal growth helps in fostering a sense of self-appreciation and acknowledgment of the hard work you’ve put into your emotional recovery. It’s a powerful affirmation that you are not the same person you were, and you have adapted and learned new ways of being, which is both transformative and healing.

Journey Through Grief

Journey Through Grief
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The journey through grief after losing a spouse is deeply personal and varies greatly from one person to another. Recognizing these signs in your life can be comforting and encouraging, indicating that it’s okay to move forward. If you feel ready to take the next steps, consider consulting with a grief counselor or therapist to support you in navigating this new phase of your life.

Remember, moving on does not mean forgetting; it means you are learning to live again while honoring the memory of your loved one.

Tamila McDonald
Tamila McDonald

Tamila McDonald is a U.S. Army veteran with 20 years of service, including five years as a military financial advisor. After retiring from the Army, she spent eight years as an AFCPE-certified personal financial advisor for wounded warriors and their families. Now she writes about personal finance and benefits programs for numerous financial websites.

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