I hate the phrase "Keeping up with the Joneses"

[phantom]

You haven't met my daughter.
If she was a commuter, she would sit at home in her room alone as much as she possibly could. Being on campus almost forces her to participate and get involved. Her friends come and get her to go to dinner or a frat meeting or a show with them. It's harder to be a loner when you're surrounded by people. Plus she hates to drive at night (she hates to drive period) so she would be unlikely to stay around for evening activities.

"Open minded" and "comfortable trying new things" don't describe her in the least. But in college, she does it because it's the thing to do and everyone else is doing it.

This describes me pretty well too. I tend to be a loner, much preferring to be by myself than with people, but occasionally enjoying social interaction. I also hate driving. Had I been a commuter in college, I probably would have spent most weekends at home on my computer or with my nose buried in a book. But, with interesting people to hang out with right down the hall, there were fewer excuses between me and making friends. Most of the people who became my friends had similar experiences, they spent high school being alone but finally found people they could connect with in college.

[LivingAlmostLarge]

Only you know your kid. I can say this after having kids. And fair isn't same for everyone. My sister had 3 kids and one kid went to private school. Due to his needs the small school fit and the 1st and 3rd went public. Fair? No but it was fair because it was needed for success. So even within family you can't say only X, Y, or Z and must be fair.