I am far from a positive person. My default setting is to assume that everything is terrible and be shocked when it isn’t. (I’m only sort of kidding.) However, even with my in-built negative predisposition, I’ve noticed that even the worst of times often have a bright side. It’s often challenging to find it, but it’s usually there, hidden in the weeds of misery and despair. This is true for both personal and financial struggles. While I’ll never be a Pollyanna Sunshine, it does help to remember that bad times often have a bright side, even if I can’t immediately see it.
What Does The Hidden Bright Side Look Like?
The bright side is often small, especially in comparison to the larger bad thing. That’s why it’s so hard to find. The bad thing is usually so all-consuming that the bright side is overshadowed. The bright side is also often not immediate. You don’t see it until the bad thing has been going on for a while. This is because the bad thing leads to changes that are often beneficial, but which don’t happen overnight. You have to wait for the good side to reveal itself.
Here are some examples of the hidden bright side from my own life:
- During the pandemic, soda was very hard to come by. Forced to cut down and go without, I was finally able to shake my caffeine addiction and get away from all the sugar/artificial sweetener. It improved my health.
- Inflation really hit junk food and restaurants hard. As a result I gave up a lot of it, lost some weight, and improved my health.
- Lockdowns improved my net worth because there was nothing to spend on.
- The pandemic forced us to rethink the way we did things like travel and celebrate holidays. Some of those changes stuck and continue to save us money and time today.
- Streaming services jacked up their prices to the point where I cancelled many of them. Instead I’ve been reading more and rediscovering my love of books, something I’d let get away from me in recent years.
- Years ago I lost a job and had time to think about what I wanted to do in life. Yes, the lack of money was stressful, but it was nice to have time to think and figure out a next move instead of just going through the days mindlessly.
- I busted my knee and couldn’t go out for a couple of months. I was forced to use up a lot of hobby supplies in the house to keep myself entertained.
How to Find the Positive
The hidden bright side is often just that: Hidden. It doesn’t jump out and smack you in the face screaming, “See, all your suffering has a bright side!” You often have to seek it out and that often means some work on your part. I’ve found a few techniques that can help.
Journaling
Writing down your thoughts and experiences can help you unlock the bright side. The process of writing and working things out on paper (instead of just letting them run loose in your head) can reveal things you won’t otherwise see. You might find that small nugget that makes you say, “Ah, ha. Now I see that my months of joblessness led me to find a few new strengths in myself.” You might see that you’re more adaptable than you believed.
Meditation
There is value in turning off your brain for a bit and letting it relax. Or in just letting the thoughts come without judgment or feeling like you have to find a solution right this minute. In that stillness you might find a connection to the bright side that you can’t see when your brain is running riot and focusing only on the bad times.
Record Keeping
Keeping records is a great way to see the bright side. You may not feel like you’re making any financial progress, but numbers don’t lie. If they’re moving in the right direction, that’s great, no matter how bad things may seem on the surface. If inflation has you cutting beloved junk food or restaurant meals out of your budget, you can track your calories, weight, and other numbers (blood pressure, cholesterol, etc.). Maybe you’re getting a benefit, even though you’re missing your favorites.
Talk about it
Sometimes unloading your problems onto a friend or therapist can give you that “Ah, ha” moment. Or the other person might point something out that you hadn’t thought of. At the very least, talking about things usually makes you feel better. Maybe you’re lamenting your inability to travel right now and your friend points out that at least you’re being kinder to the environment. It may not make you feel a lot better, but it’s something.
Focus on others
Wallowing in your own bad times is a sure way to become more miserable. It can help to focus on others for a while. Go out and volunteer for a meaningful cause. Help a neighbor with a project, or make some meals for senior neighbors. Remember that no matter how bad things are for you, there are others in far worse positions. Focusing on others can give you some perspective and remind you that you do have some good things in your life.
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Jennifer Derrick is a freelance writer, novelist and children’s book author. When she’s not writing Jennifer enjoys running marathons, playing tennis, boardgames and reading pretty much everything she can get her hands on. You can learn more about Jennifer at: https://jenniferderrick.com/.
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