early retirement and not working

[Singuy]

To me at a young age, retirement lite is the way to go. There are too many unknown variables for say the next 45 years to really go full retirement mode. It's near impossible to get a job in my or my wives profession if we have a hiatus for 25 years. So just in case there maybe unknowns, I stay conservative and choose to work 24h a week or so.

[LivingAlmostLarge]

To me at a young age, retirement lite is the way to go. There are too many unknown variables for say the next 45 years to really go full retirement mode. It's near impossible to get a job in my or my wives profession if we have a hiatus for 25 years. So just in case there maybe unknowns, I stay conservative and choose to work 24h a week or so.

Maybe but won't you pull the trigger at say 50? And call it a day if you have enough? If you hit your number whatever it is, why not?

[LivingAlmostLarge]

Your mom is a lot different than my mom then, (she's passed) but she never wanted me to work. My job was to stay home and take care of my house and kids. If we didn't have enough money then DH should go get a 2nd job, after all that's what my dad did.

I went to college, but never had a career, only a job and when I had our 3rd kid I went part time(been 21 years). I never felt comfortable not being able to take care of myself and relying on DH $$ wise, just in case anything happened. But we'll be married 30 years in Sept so I could've just relied on him.

Now I'm 54 and been working from home for the past year and we were told we need to go back in the office on June 1st. Ugh, I don't want to go! Yesterday I spent all day going over all our finances and I could just quit. Mainly because DH will keep working another 5 years and has a pension that will take care of all our expenses in retirement, plus I have a 401k and he has Deferred Comp and we have $$ in Roths. If anything we will have more money in retirement than we live on now, but dang I just can't pull the trigger on not working. I'm just afraid, but I know it's an irrational fear because even if DH died I'd have his life insurance that would take care of me and his pension payout, but I still don't feel comfortable not working.

My company pays out profit sharing in September so I'm going to stay till then (if I leave at all) but in the meantime I'm keeping my eyes open for something closer to home. Only thing, and this is kinda bad, but I've become lazy, I only want to work on my terms, i have that flexibility where I am now so it's hard to give that up, plus the 5 weeks vacation!! I'm just hung up on the whole having to commute into the office when I've been doing everything fine from home for a year.

Try to tune the people out that say you should be working or having a career, there is nothing wrong with being there for your kids! Too bad more mom's couldn't stay home, I do believe the breakdown of the family is a big part of what is wrong with today's society!

I don't think that it's the mom that needs to be the one at home. Where I am there are quite a few stay at home dads and they seem quite content. They do just as good a job and enjoy it. So i'm not sure it's wrong for either gender to be the "stay" at home spouse. So why not pull the trigger? I like the idea of not working after 55. I don't mind working now. I still am working now.

[Snicks]

My dad from the family side.
He isn't particularly good with money.
He can't understand me driving a car for an extended period of time, saving and investing as much as I do, or saving up cash for things before making a purchase.
In the words of Dave Ramsey, my dad is quite "normal."
I catch a lot of hell from him. Constantly criticizing and complaining about how I live my life.
It gets hard to tune out after hearing it for years and years.

From the peer side, it's mostly coworkers.
I keep very quiet about money at work, but some people sort of figure out that I might be better than average.
Probably just from observation.
I don't care so much about payday.
When I'm asked about how much my truck payment is I say 0.
I get the "must be nice" comment a lot.

I think it's odd someone would ask "how much my payment " is for my car, etc. Why do you entertain that? I would just not answer that, it's none of their business so if you don't give them any info you aren't going to get the "must be nice" baloney, lol.

[srblanco7]

The "identity" thing is a big issue. Many people truly are their job and their title.

In conversations with good friends, I've shared our plans to ER in early 2023. Their reactions, from "mild envy" to "you'll find another job because you need to work", are likely more of a reflection of their state of mind than anything having to do with our situation. They are very good friends, and we value their thoughts and opinions, but in no way will it alter our plans .

[rennigade]

Early retirement is a weird term. If you can retire whenever you want, why is it early? It's just retirement.

[disneysteve]

Early retirement is a weird term. If you can retire whenever you want, why is it early? It's just retirement.

When 65 was set as the "retirement age" for SS, the average lifespan in the US was about 62-63.

[james.hendrickson]

In conversations with good friends, I've shared our plans to ER in early 2023. Their reactions, from "mild envy" to "you'll find another job because you need to work", are likely more of a reflection of their state of mind than anything having to do with our situation. They are very good friends, and we value their thoughts and opinions, but in no way will it alter our plans .

Back in my early 30s I had a net worth of 1.1 Million. I ended up telling some of my friends about it and their reaction was kinda funny. A lot of people made comments to the effect of "Oh, you're a millionaire, but you're so nice". Its like they assumed that people who had money must be unethical or greedy. I think when it comes to decisions about your own money, you need to divorce yourself from the expectations of others.

[disneysteve]

Back in my early 30s I had a net worth of 1.1 Million. I ended up telling some of my friends about it and their reaction was kinda funny. A lot of people made comments to the effect of "Oh, you're a millionaire, but you're so nice". Its like they assumed that people who had money must be unethical or greedy. I think when it comes to decisions about your own money, you need to divorce yourself from the expectations of others.

It’s so strange how “millionaire” still
carries this impression of some elite baron living in a mansion somewhere and exploiting the “little guy”. People don’t realize how very many millionaires they are surrounded by who are no different than them.

[Like2Plan]

How old are your parents? My Mom is 88--she was born during the great depression. While she was relatively young (during the depression)--the financial lessons her parents taught her as a result of that time made a lasting impression. I know she would not be comfortable with investing in the stock market. FDIC insured bonds are about as much risk she is willing to tolerate. And, truth be told she is at an age where she might need access to most (if not all) of her available assets.

In regards to your Mom wanting you to have a career. That could be driven by fear. Mom's have a habit of worrying about their kids no matter how old they are. I'm not sure how you successfully navigate this. But, something tells me that even if you disclosed your net worth she would still worry about your future security. Sometimes it takes a little while (or a long while) for parents to realize that their children get to make they own choices about life. It might not be their choice, but it is not their life to lead. Jackie Kennedy had a phrase for it--"the polite brush-off". (DS uses it quite effectively on DH and I--not that we would ever get in to his business--perfect parents that we are. )

[LivingAlmostLarge]

It’s so strange how “millionaire” still
carries this impression of some elite baron living in a mansion somewhere and exploiting the “little guy”. People don’t realize how very many millionaires they are surrounded by who are no different than them.

This is so true. My neighbors I bet are all millionaires based on real estate alone.

[LivingAlmostLarge]

How old are your parents? My Mom is 88--she was born during the great depression. While she was relatively young (during the depression)--the financial lessons her parents taught her as a result of that time made a lasting impression. I know she would not be comfortable with investing in the stock market. FDIC insured bonds are about as much risk she is willing to tolerate. And, truth be told she is at an age where she might need access to most (if not all) of her available assets.

In regards to your Mom wanting you to have a career. That could be driven by fear. Mom's have a habit of worrying about their kids no matter how old they are. I'm not sure how you successfully navigate this. But, something tells me that even if you disclosed your net worth she would still worry about your future security. Sometimes it takes a little while (or a long while) for parents to realize that their children get to make they own choices about life. It might not be their choice, but it is not their life to lead. Jackie Kennedy had a phrase for it--"the polite brush-off". (DS uses it quite effectively on DH and I--not that we would ever get in to his business--perfect parents that we are. )

69 and 90. So I'm not sure why she's so into just cash.

[surfius]

As long as you have to possibility to do it, well, retire. Your mother has a different mindset. All our parents knew it was work. If I could, I'd quit right now. I genuinely think that this system isn't made for us to live a happy life. You choose the conservative and safe way of work, the 9 to 5 job, and that is it. That's not life. If some are happy this way, that's great. I'm not. I mean, working like a slave until I'm 66-67 years old? Oh, God, no. Look at some calculations. You can see here https://www.howtofire.com/15-an-hour-is-how-much-a-year/ how 15$ an hour gets you nowhere. Just do whatever your heart tells you to!

[riverwed070707]

I've been pretty transparent about my early retirement plans both with family and in the workplace since I made the plan at 21. I guess I talk about it less now than I did back then because now that its so close it kind of feels like bragging. Honestly, when the day comes, I don't even know if I will tell my family until I'm ready to relocate which could be a few years after There are very few co-workers who I'd keep in touch with. But everyone knows I do real estate and that is how I will retire early. I guess that makes explaining a little easier - feels like saying "I'm in real estate" vs "I saved so much money I don't need to work to get by" even if real estate is a pretty hands off source of income.

[LivingAlmostLarge]

I've been pretty transparent about my early retirement plans both with family and in the workplace since I made the plan at 21. I guess I talk about it less now than I did back then because now that its so close it kind of feels like bragging. Honestly, when the day comes, I don't even know if I will tell my family until I'm ready to relocate which could be a few years after There are very few co-workers who I'd keep in touch with. But everyone knows I do real estate and that is how I will retire early. I guess that makes explaining a little easier - feels like saying "I'm in real estate" vs "I saved so much money I don't need to work to get by" even if real estate is a pretty hands off source of income.

I probably need to buy a bunch of rentals at some point but seriously it might also be easier than just sitting there smiling and saying I have $5m in the bank I'm good.