It’s no secret that, for many people, financial struggles have led to trouble in their relationships that have resulted in divorce in some of the worst cases. Sometimes, these issues could have been avoided, while some of them were worsened by other problems such as poor communication. If you’d like to see a good idea of just how financial struggles can lead to relationship trouble and divorce, read on to see some of the ways so that you have a chance of stopping the same thing from happening to either yours or a friend’s relationship.
Disagreements on How to Spend Money
Before people get married, it’s important for them to talk about their priorities when it comes to money. This is because when you have different priorities from your partner, this will become a bone of contention sooner or later. When you spend money on a purchase that your partner deems to be a waste of money, you can be sure you’ll fight about it. The same case goes if your partner makes an investment that you feel isn’t worthwhile. If it gets to the point that you can’t find any common ground as far as spending money goes, one of you may file for a divorce. Note that in Washington State, there’s a mandatory waiting period of at least 91 days before a divorce can be finalized by the court. While this may be enough time for you to talk with your partner and turn things around, it’s often too late to do so by the time things have reached this point.
Inequal Income Can Be a Problem
In cases where one of the partners earns less than the other, they may feel ashamed and demotivated, and these feelings will lead to a host of issues. For example, for couples where the wife is the income earner and the husband doesn’t work full-time, there’s a 33% higher likelihood of a divorce. This isn’t necessarily a result of money in the household being inadequate, but it’s more of the problems that will crop up, including poor communication. This may be solved by openly discussing your finances and making sure that your partner knows that you value them and that their state has no impact on the way you feel for them.
Financial Infidelity Can Lead to Issues
Financial infidelity occurs when one partner withholds the truth as far as money goes. This may be in the form of hiding credit cards and debts or simply being dishonest about income. You can be sure that a good number among the 40% to 50% of marriages in the United States that end in divorce do so as a result of this secrecy. When one partner has a lot of debt, they may feel the need to hide some of their spending, which could actually be on things that they need and that aren’t really luxuries. This may be done in a bid to avoid facing their partner’s disappointment.
Different Attitudes Towards Money
People’s views on saving and spending are often different, and this can lead to fights between people who have different views towards money. This is because one partner may not see the issue of spending money without any thought, while the other needs to carefully plan their expenditure and live on a strict budget. This will lead to tension that may aggravate other areas of the relationship and cause irreversible damage if not addressed in time.
Clearly, most money problems that can lead to divorce are compounded by poor communication. This means that you must ensure that the lines of communication between you and your spouse are always clear and open. This may give you a chance of fixing problems around money before they get out of hand.
Some Practical Resources
Lastly, if you are reading this because you’re having relationship troubles, you might consider checking out dinksfinance’s article on what to do if your wife yells at you. It’s mostly about wives yelling, but it has some practical advice that will help regardless of your partner’s gender. The article is here.
Also, another great resource to check is John Gottman’s book Seven Principles For Making Marriage Work. Gottman spent a lifetime researching marriage and was able to distill some good practical principles for how to improve your relationship.
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