Parents cause this?

[disneysteve]

I don't necessarily think the parents caused this. I think loose credit and lack of financial skills among the populous are more to blame.

I still think it traces back to the parents since they are the ones responsible for giving kids their financial education. The problem is that if the parents are living beyond their means and buried in debt, they aren't in much of a position to teach their kids the right way.

Loose credit is (or was) definitely a problem. I've shared before that in college, my friends and I used to go around the mall and apply for all the store credit cards just to get the free gifts they handed out for applying. We knew there was no way in hell any of us would actually get approved because we had no jobs and no income. In recent years, however, all you needed to get a credit card was a pulse (and sometimes not even that). As a result, lots of college students signed up and got cards and proceeded to rack up thousands in debt that they had no way to repay. Still, I blame the parents for that because they should have taught their kids how credit cards worked and the consequences of having one and not paying the bill in full each month. We've done that with our daughter and will do so again before we send her off to college.

That said, I DID get a credit card while in college. My father had to co-sign since I didn't qualify on my own. From day one, I paid the bill in full each and every month, never charging more than I could afford to repay. Sometime I used it to make larger purchases (like books) with my parents' knowledge since they were the ones who would be paying the bill. So I'm not opposed to college kids having a credit card as long as they know how to use it properly.

[lovcom]

Lovcom,

All the types of things you are saying could have been cut and pasted from a previous generation. It never changes. Goodness gracious--there is no way you could have been around in the '60s and the "hippie, flower-power" generation.

But that is not my point. My point is when young people start out, they don't always catch on that it generally takes quite a bit of time to catch up to the same comfortable life style that their parents have.

I realize each generation thinks the newer one is "strange" or "lazy", or whatever.

But this is not what I'm talking about. There is much more to this with the current crop of 20 somethings....something is different here, and unlike ANY generation before in America.

For the first time EVER in America, this generation of 20 somethings will stumble to a standard of living LOWER then their parents. They will live longer at home, have fewer college degrees, and get into more trouble too. So you see, what I write here is not the normal "the kids of today..." rhetoric all generations will bemoan....for this latest crop of 20 somethings....it is different.

[buildmybudget]

This issue is compounded because of so many things. Society and the media say we can have it all and our parents are out there trying to give it to us. They want us to have a better life than they did. The current economic times and shift away from being productive(online gaming, facebook, etc) can explain why people are home longer...and that turns into enablement by the parents. But what are they to do knowing the state of economy? It's a vicious circle that capitalism created, and I don't think there is any easy solution.

[amarowsky]

DisneySteve,

I only compared the US to China to just demonstrate a contrasting culture. The kids stay at home. . .they live in the same house for generations, but you could hardly characterize them as "mooching" off of Mom and Dad. In fact, I think their culture is very "successful" mindset.

Then we wonder why our kids tell us to "screw off" when we need some assistance in our 80's and 90's.

I think there's a happy medium to be reached between "Homesteading" and "Staying Under One Roof."

In fact, I think the "push" for Junior to go out and buy his/her own house and that cultural expectation partially fueled the Housing Bubble. . .it created artificial competition for lower priced houses (starter), which propelled artificial money up the bubble. When easy credit got injected into it, it created a disaster we are still reeling from. Some of it was financial but some of it is cultural as we are discussing in this thread here.

I think it's unfair to say to your kid, "Whatsa matta? You can't make it as a clerk at Borders?"

Now. . .I don't think they should get too comfortable at home either, even though they are always welcome. There's a small 8 by 10 bedroom, twin bed available kinda thing for crashing until you get on your feet. Pay $200/month for food/utilities. . .something.

.

I agree with this. By people thinking they're suppose to expedite to move out and become self Dependant before they are has contributed to the housing bubble. My buddy bought a house way out of his price range and can't afford it w/ out his 4 room mates.

[disneysteve]

My buddy bought a house way out of his price range and can't afford it w/ out his 4 room mates.

And whose fault is that? I'm not sure because it depends on the situation. Most likely, it is the bank's fault for making the loan to a customer who couldn't possibly afford the payments. That's what caused much of the financial mess in the housing market.

[Like2Plan]

For the first time EVER in America, this generation of 20 somethings will stumble to a standard of living LOWER then their parents. They will live longer at home, have fewer college degrees, and get into more trouble too. So you see, what I write here is not the normal "the kids of today..." rhetoric all generations will bemoan....for this latest crop of 20 somethings....it is different.

lovcom,
Who's fault is that? It certainly isn't the fault of 20somethings. Wouldn't you attribute that to a national policy "writing checks" which can't be honored--overutilizing credit ie national debt, deficit spending, shrinking job market, outsourcing of jobs to other countries et'c... I certainly wouldn't label 20soimethings, "lazy, lack aspirations, lack desire for wealth, material goods, and a defeatus attitude in that age group is prevelent." as you did above.

[Inkstain82]

I'm intrigued as to how they will get into more trouble when crime rates have been going down for decades.

[Snodog]

Today's youth are lazy, lack aspirations, lack desire for wealth, material goods, and a defeatus attitude in that age group is prevelent.

Thats what they said about my generation 20 years ago (generation X) and todays 20 somethings will be saying the same thing 20 years from now. Trashing the current generation is almost an American pastime.

I'm sure todays 20 somethings will turn into upstanding citizens just like the rest of us did.

[irmanator]

People think I am nuts because I have told my children that my job as a parent is to raise self sufficient adults. Therefore if they stay in my house after college I have failed and I do not intend to fail.

[disneysteve]

People think I am nuts because I have told my children that my job as a parent is to raise self sufficient adults. Therefore if they stay in my house after college I have failed and I do not intend to fail.

I couldn't agree more. It is unfortunate how increasingly uncommon this mindset seems to be.

[zakity]

I tell mine that I am raising adults, not children. I don't want them to be children when they grow up. I want them to be adults.

[disneysteve]

I tell mine that I am raising adults, not children. I don't want them to be children when they grow up. I want them to be adults.

That's a great line. Kind of like saying you aren't growing seeds, you are growing plants. They start out as seeds (children) but the goal is to end up with full grown plants (adults).

[amarowsky]

And whose fault is that? I'm not sure because it depends on the situation. Most likely, it is the bank's fault for making the loan to a customer who couldn't possibly afford the payments. That's what caused much of the financial mess in the housing market.

It is the banks fault initially. Banks and Lenders who were constantly marketing talking about "lowest rates ever" and loans for "next to nothing" also fueled by the $7500 interest free loan. It was the banks fault for baiting my friend and approving him. But it was his fault for accepting the terms considering his situation.

You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make him buy a house way out of his price range.


*in his defense, he was engaged to a girl w/ good credit and similar income. But it was a far to quick and not wise engagement and they broke it off about 6 months after getting the mortgage. IN BOTH THEIR NAMES! My friends, his family, and I all tried to warn him and give him our wisdom, but his stubbornness and pride made him un-shakable.

[lovcom]

lovcom,
Who's fault is that? It certainly isn't the fault of 20somethings. Wouldn't you attribute that to a national policy "writing checks" which can't be honored--overutilizing credit ie national debt, deficit spending, shrinking job market, outsourcing of jobs to other countries et'c... I certainly wouldn't label 20soimethings, "lazy, lack aspirations, lack desire for wealth, material goods, and a defeatus attitude in that age group is prevelent." as you did above.

The things you listed do contribute to the high amount of losers in the 20 something age range, and on that note we agree.

However, those are just secondary causes.

The primary cause is lousy parents, that did a lousy job instilling a strong work ethic, strong desire for education, and they have allow their kids to wallow through the entire weekend watching cable, crusing the internet, all the while their rooms are a mess, and they don't do chores. Often these parents don't dicipline because they want to be their children's "friend".

You want to blame socieity, but I, a neo-conservative blame the family of origin because the few families that do it right have 20 somethings that are very successful and by mid 20's many make 6 figures.

Hillary had it all wrong...it does NOT take a village...it takes a Family.

[lovcom]

It is the banks fault initially. Banks and Lenders who were constantly marketing talking about "lowest rates ever" and loans for "next to nothing" also fueled by the $7500 interest free loan. It was the banks fault for baiting my friend and approving him. But it was his fault for accepting the terms considering his situation.

You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make him buy a house way out of his price range.


*in his defense, he was engaged to a girl w/ good credit and similar income. But it was a far to quick and not wise engagement and they broke it off about 6 months after getting the mortgage. IN BOTH THEIR NAMES! My friends, his family, and I all tried to warn him and give him our wisdom, but his stubbornness and pride made him un-shakable.

Wrong....it's the parent's fault initially, and entirely.

If a kid is raised properly, he's not going to fall for the bank's craap.