my husband quit his job

**disneysteve** · 06-03-2021, 04:03 AM

Congrats to both of you. As we often say, living below your means and saving regularly gives you a lot of flexibility in life.

I did something similar in 2000. I was 35 and hated my job, so I quit. Nothing lined up. I stayed “retired” for 3 months, not really even looking for a new one. Finally a job found me as word spread that I was available.

I hope he enjoys every second of his sabbatical from work and uses the time to really think about what he’d like to do going forward.

**rennigade** · 06-03-2021, 04:06 AM

Work is overrated. Most people can live off far less than what they currently spend. For whatever reason, people like the plan on spending just as much in retirement as when they were working. I never really understood that. Your expenses should be much lower in retirement than when you were working...if not, you probably screwed up. Different strokes. Congrats.

**bjl584** · 06-03-2021, 04:38 AM

Congrats.

You are right. So many people are living on the edge that they can't imagine how someone could survive without a steady paycheck rolling in.

I hope that your husband enjoys his time away from work to the fullest.

**srblanco7** · 06-03-2021, 05:30 AM

Congrats on being in a position where this can happen and it’s not a “crisis”. It’s interesting (at least to me) that so many people can not envision not working. Certainly for many in the US, work has become the primary source of self-esteem and recognition and yet there are so many other leisurely pursuits (e.g., hobbies, family, friends, exercise) that should be more rewarding.

“Leisure consists in all those virtuous activities by which a man grows morally, intellectually, and spiritually” - Cicero

**Like2Plan** · 06-03-2021, 05:31 AM

Congrats to your DH.

Sounds like he has an awesome summer planned.

**Thrif-t** · 06-03-2021, 05:36 AM

Good for him and your family! It's awesome.

Life is too short to be miserable. Best of luck :-)

**Snicks** · 06-03-2021, 06:37 AM

Really embracing life is deciding to look at how YOU want to live, not how others want you to live. I used to get raised eyebrows all of my life. Everytime I left a job for a new one, I asked for a later start date and would leave my old job, then take a 2 week break before starting a new one. People thought that was weird. I always lived below my means so i could afford it. But, people acted like it was irresponsible or something.

**Scallywag** · 06-03-2021, 09:28 AM

Originally posted by Snydley View Post

After much consideration, DH decided he had enough and quit a few weeks ago. He was making ~180K

. The environment was really bad (upper management being the problem and the work was super boring). The stress was really starting to impact his health. He's 52. He thought he'd just quit, take ~ 4 months off to golf and fish, and then look for something in Aug/Sept. He's not sure he wants to work full time ever again and might look for some consulting jobs.

He can do this because we don't spend all we earn every month, not even close. We have 3 years left on our mortgage and ~220K in various saving accounts (which we plan to use a lot of for our daughter's college, who is 14). Our only monthly bills besides utilities/mortgage is one car payment. I make 142K and we are hoping we can not dip into our savings and just live on my salary. We'll see.

People cannot believe he just quit with no job lined up. I told him it's because (1) nearly everyone needs every penny they make every month for their bills/living expenses, and (2) too many people link too much of their self-worth to their title/job.

This post is really to say thanks to all of you on this forum. If I did not join this group I don't know if he would have been able to make this move. For example, I would not have refinanced my house repeatedly (paid ahead on the mortgage) or managed my own retirement investing (we made a ton on those accounts in the last 10 years) to get us to the position we are in now financially.

Congrats on being FIRE-d! Well done and I hope he enjoys every moment of his hard earned break!

**disneysteve** · 06-03-2021, 09:45 AM

Originally posted by Snicks View Post

Everytime I left a job for a new one, I asked for a later start date and would leave my old job, then take a 2 week break before starting a new one. People thought that was weird. I always lived below my means so i could afford it. But, people acted like it was irresponsible or something.

I've told this story before, but when I left my job in 2000, I came downstairs the following Tuesday and asked my wife if she wanted to go to Disney World. She said, sure. When? I said how about Saturday. Sure enough, we loaded up the car a few days later and hit the road. Spent 10 wonderful days in Florida. A few weeks after that, my wife and I went to Las Vegas for a previously planned trip for a medical education conference. Sure we burned through some savings, but that's what an EF is for. I might never have the time to do that stuff again.

**Snydley** · 06-03-2021, 09:48 AM

Thanks everyone! Great to hear the well wishes and stories of others taking time off- and I like the "FIRE-d" term!

He has been offered two positions already and he has said he is not considering new employment until the end of the summer.

**LivingAlmostLarge** · 06-03-2021, 11:17 AM

Congratulations Snydley! Tell your DH to FIRE off to the sunset and don't go back! NO absolutely not. You guys have done a great job. DH took a sabbatical/FIRE in 2015. Single income family trust me people were like "are you Effing Nuts?" Just like steve. He stayed that way for 12 months. Now we are again "effing nuts cutting his salary for a job by 2/3".

Most of our friends are like "what the hell is wrong with you? Are you insane? " This is not paraphrased but what has come out of people's mouths. They don't mean to say it I can see them cringing but the shock is real and it slips out. I mean we're still single income and I can see their eyes saying "are you effing nuts?" DH's salary is also why couple of people they were interested in hiring said "I can't take the job. The salary is too low. I can't afford to trim back my lifestyle. There is no way even if I'm interested in a start up that I can't take the paycut." 2 different people they offered the job too said that flat out they really wished they could, and they think it's a mistake to pass up. But they can't make it work financially.

So CHEERS! You deserve it. You made it such that you can make any choice you want. Do not go back.

**disneysteve** · 06-03-2021, 11:27 AM

Originally posted by LivingAlmostLarge View Post

DH took a sabbatical/FIRE in 2015. Single income family trust me people were like "are you Effing Nuts?"

I suspect I will get a lot of similar responses if I do in fact decide to retire next year. I'll be walking away from a 250K/yr job at 57. Maybe I am nuts. Time will tell. But the one thing we can't save up is time. It's impossible to put a dollar value on that.

Look, I'm currently dealing with my cousin's estate. He retired at 55 and realized his dream of moving to Florida where he enjoyed nearly 10 years of living in paradise. He was diagnosed with cancer in 2016 but still did very well until just a few months ago when it finally caught up with him and ultimately led to his death earlier last month. We are so grateful that he didn't follow the normal path and work until 62 or 65. He got to enjoy life. He went to Italy. He took a European cruise. He toured California. He went to Reno and Vegas and numerous other places. He went to hundreds of car shows. He got to live life to the fullest not bogged down by a job all of those years.

It's a good example to follow.

**TexasHusker** · 06-03-2021, 07:32 PM

I'll never forget quitting my job 8 years ago. I was making near $300K after bonuses, with 2 months of PTO, 401K, the whole nine yards.

I went across the street to my neighbor and told him I was thinking if quitting and he said "no, you don't do that. You're like a 2 percenter. You don't walk away from that deal."

Well I did, and as the old Robert Frost poem says "and that has made all the difference."

**kork13** · 06-04-2021, 12:06 AM

Simply fantastic. Congratulations to you both! Your ability to make that choice is a testament to your intentional efforts over time. I hope you both enjoy the summer, whether it's merely a short sabbatical or the start of a long & happy retirement/semi-retirement.

I've talked about it before, but my wife (unwillingly) left the military due to medical/mental health reasons ~2 years ago. Although the circumstances were not of our own choice, we never worried about surviving without her income, because we decided from the very start of our marriage to always live off of only one person's income. That has also allowed us to save/invest a great deal over time. So although her departure from the military was forced upon us, she was able to take all the time she needed to work through everything, and decide what she wants to do. She's been a SAHM for the past 2 years, and while she loves the free time with our young kids, she has other dreams as well. She decided to pursue a Physical Therapy doctoral program, refreshed herself on some prerequisite classes, and just submitted her application to a DPT program last week. Meanwhile, I'm on the latter half of my military career, and plan to pull chocks the second I'm retirement eligible in 7 years, very possibly never to work again and just be a SAHD (at age 42, kids then between 7-13).

All that to say, enjoy the time & opportunity for him to reassess his goals. That's really what should drive the decision making from here. You both have the flexibility to do what you want, so go after whatever will provide the most fulfillment & satisfaction in your lives. And have fun while you do it!

my husband quit his job