inheritance, do you want one?

[sv2007]

I read this article today:

https://www.marketwatch.com/story/my-son-wont-let-me-see-his-kids-unless-i-change-my-10-million-will-2016-05-16

I don't want an inheritance.
Even when I wasn't as financially well off as now, I don't remember ever cared for inheritance.

We decided not to leave our son anything when he was born; we'll pay for college/grad school. Now my wife is starting to change her mind, but I'm resisting.

I think my parents, most likely, will leave me with something significant.
Which I don't feel grateful or resentful; I just hope they've done proper estate planning.

What's your take on inheritance?
Do you want one?
Do you want to leave one to your child(ren)?

When I talk about inheritance, I mean some significant amount of money. Most people will leave something behind since part of retirement planning is to have enough savings to last until you die... and most plan conservatively.

[bjl584]

I think most people wouldn't mind having one.

Personally, I'm not planning my finances around receiving one. I'll probably end up with something, but I'm not changing or altering anything that I do with my life or finances based on some arbitrary amount that I might receive one day.

I think that there are a lot of people out there that get into trouble while they wait for gramma to die. I know one couple, that is a friend of the family, who are waiting for their inheritance so they can move and pay off some old debt. I can't imaging getting into a mental state where financial peace will be achieved as soon as a loved one passes away. It's sociopathic if you ask me.

[disneysteve]

Do I want one? Well, not really, because that means either my mother or my cousin will have died. Do I expect to get one? Yes, because my mom is almost 86 and my cousin is 10 years older than me so odds are I'll outlive him.

That said, I agree with Brian. I'm certainly not factoring any inheritance into my financial planning. It's kind of impossible to include it when you don't know when you will receive it or how much it will be.

If and when I get money, I'll deal with it then.

[dawnwes]

I have no idea when or how much, so we just make sure we are self sufficient and not counting on any money.

Do I want to leave one? YES! I plan to leave money to my children and I need to make sure that my special needs son will be cared for, either by one of his siblings or through someone else.

[disneysteve]

I didn't answer the 2nd question. Do I want to leave money to anyone?

Yes, I certainly hope that we will leave money to our daughter, her family if she has one at that point, and to some charities as well.

[Fishindude77]

If there is any inheritance to be had when a family member checks out, I'd prefer they gift it to others in the family who need it more than us.

[disneysteve]

If there is any inheritance to be had when a family member checks out, I'd prefer they gift it to others in the family who need it more than us.

I guess it's okay if you voluntarily waive an inheritance but I've heard plenty of stories of parents leaving more money to the child who hasn't done well in life. I feel like that is punishing the child who was successful and rewarding the one who never made anything of themselves.

[phantom]

I'd be happy to receive an inheritance, but my expectations are pretty low. My parents and I agree that my sister needs their financial help much more than I do, and they don't have all that much to leave behind. I'm pretty sure they'll leave me something, but I doubt it will have a significant impact on my financial world. They're still young and healthy, so I definitely don't expect an inheritance from them any time soon.

I can't imagine being in the position of the son in the article and holding my kids for ransom from their grandparents in an attempt to influence my inheritance. I like to think that even if my parents had millions to dole out, I would still take whatever they cared to give me however they cared to give it to me. I certainly wouldn't deprive my children of a relationship with their grandparents just because I wouldn't be getting the money I wanted. It's not even like the son is being completely deprived of an inheritance, he's just getting it doled out as an income instead of in a lump sum.

[msomnipotent]

I don't plan on getting anything. I will probably have to kick in some money if one or both need a nursing home at any point. My parents recently wrote their will, and it created a major to-do between the two successful sisters and the 2 that are "less so". Mainly because they planned on giving their share of our summer home to the other 2 sisters, and they legally cannot do so.

If all goes according to plan, my only child will inherit a decent estate. I feel that we should do what we can to make the next generation better off, even if just a little. Teaching her now what to do with whatever money comes her way is a big part of that.

[disneysteve]

My parents recently wrote their will, and it created a major to-do between the two successful sisters and the 2 that are "less so". Mainly because they planned on giving their share of our summer home to the other 2 sisters, and they legally cannot do so.

This is exactly what I mentioned above. Treating children differently shouldn't happen. Rewarding failure and punishing success shouldn't happen. I don't know what people are thinking when they do that.

Teaching her now what to do with whatever money comes her way is a big part of that.

This is so very important.And it just feeds into what should be a lifetime of financial education for our children. We haven't specifically broached this subject with our daughter yet but it is certainly something that should be addressed at some point. We have taught her plenty of other lessons in personal finance and continue to do so on a regular basis.

[corn18]

Want one? Nope. Will I get one? Probably. It will go into a charitable trust for philanthropic purposes.

Will I leave one? Probably. Might be pretty large. That's ok. It will go into trust for the kids until they are 26. After that, I'll have to trust that they don't behave like I used to.

[Fishindude77]

This is exactly what I mentioned above. Treating children differently shouldn't happen. Rewarding failure and punishing success shouldn't happen. I don't know what people are thinking when they do that.


It's their money, they can do whatever they want with it.
If it rubs a particular heir wrong, so be it.

A friend of mine inherited a farm when his dad passed away and his sister didn't get much. My friend had always worked the farm with his dad and knew how to care for things. I'm sure dad knew he would hang on to it, take care of things, etc., while the sister would probably just sell it and spend the money. Smart thinking from my view.

[disneysteve]

A friend of mine inherited a farm when his dad passed away and his sister didn't get much. My friend had always worked the farm with his dad and knew how to care for things. I'm sure dad knew he would hang on to it, take care of things, etc., while the sister would probably just sell it and spend the money. Smart thinking from my view.

That isn't quite what I meant. It's fine to leave a particular asset to a particular kid if there is one who would appreciate something more. But that should be balanced so that the other kid(s) get other assets of similar value. Otherwise you just set up family battles that often permanently destroy relationships. I know too many families that have been torn apart by issues like this.

This is why we had one child.

[tripods68]

As a legacy you I want our money to be inherited by my kids. Assuming we have done a great job investing over the years, that means our kids will be better off. I think you always want to teach your kids, be a steward of what they will inherit so they don't suffer/homeless/starvation/bankruptcy like most people I grew up with.

I told my daughter, she will take financial classes (FPU) before she enters high school & college, reminding her greater financial responsibility she will encounter after marriage/kids one day.

But I don't expect or ever thought how much inheritance we might receive one day. That's just not in a picture at all.

[Joan.of.the.Arch]

It never occurred to me that my parents might be able to leave an inheritance for any or all of their six kids. Relatives or friends would have had other priorities for heirs. So the thought never occupied any space in my brain. Inheritance? That's something to do with other people, not me.