I need advice on how to use my money for a cheap place to live

[GaiaGoddess]

I guess you don't want to change. People here have offered numerous suggestions to improve your situation but you have excuses for every single one of them.

Most people have suggested things I've already thought of and tried, that's how I know they don't work. Like i said, I turned the ideas down to myself first, it isn't just because it's coming from other people too.

All I can say is, financial security and a house are earned. No one has any "rights" to them. If you don't want to change your situation by doing things outside your comfort zone, then start embracing the idea of being poor and on the brink of bankruptcy for the rest of your life.

I guess we'll have to agree to disagree that every human being deserves a place to live. It could be easily done too if the world wasn't so screwed up. There are more vacant foreclosed houses sitting around than there are homeless people. But the world is ran by money, not human decency.

There is no need to be surprised that anyone is able to survive and thrive on min wage jobs. The reason they can and you can't is simple. You are spending too much money by convincing yourself that all the outrageous expenses are justified and to top it all off, you don't want to put in any real effort towards earning a higher income. The math behind your budget doesn't care that you're only spending the money on what you perceive to be "bare essentials".

I find it pretty sad that you don't consider mental health a bare essential. I do what I need to do to keep myself from wanting to commit suicide. And you know as well as I do that tons of people working minimum wage living off welfare spend money on drugs, alchohol and cigarettes. I don't smoke or do drugs and I only drink when i'm at a party or at the bar or a wedding. And I don't even do it every month either.

You are 41, have almost no savings

Almost no savings?! How is $12,000 almost nothing? I feel rich with this much money. I am sorry I wasn't able to save money at my part time minimum wage jobs!

and your "issues" and physical state probably don't make you a very eligible bachelorette. Bluntly put, the odds are you'll have to figure out your own financial future with no one to help and it's very obvious that you're doing a horrible job with it.

Now you're just plain insulting me. If it matters, the reason i'm single is because I don't want to get married. I was almost engaged in the past and realized I didn't want to go through with it. I was just involved with a man at work for a year and a half up until he quit last month. I have broken up with most of the guys i've dated. I don't even know why I should have to defend myself on this subject! I have been told i'm "one of the rare hard to find good girls" so I'm not going to let a stranger on the internet make me feel bad about myself.

Your whole approach towards secondary and higher education and life in general is deeply flawed.

Why can't you just accept that others have different opinions on the world? I am far from the only person with the same views.

But employment statistics clearly show that you are much better off with a college education.

True, but it doesn't mean you are doomed to a ****ty life without college, either! I may not own a home right now but I haven't lost hope I will find a way to get to my goal.

And if you're convinced that the only thing that helps social anxiety is alcohol and hence countering your social anxiety is off the table, then I'm glad you're not contaminating the gene pool by reproducing.

I didn't say alcohol was the only thing that helps, I said it's the only thing that has helped ME.

It's almost like you've subconsciously given up on life. Then why even bother wasting everyone's time here? If you truly wanted to change, you'd use your time off from work and the savings you have to go see a shrink or join a social anxiety meetup group or try anything else that might help which would lead to more job opportunities.

Because I didn't come in here for help with my anxiety problems, I came in here to find out what other options I didn't find yet can help me get a place with the money I have right now. I didn't come in here thinking I was going to waste anyone's time, but now I see i'm really wasting mine.

And as far as your sleep disorder goes, have you tried leading a more healthy lifestyle? Probably try working out in the evening before heading to bed? But I'm sure you have a very good reason why you cannot work out or that working out is not going to help. So, I'll just stop with the suggestions.

This isn't about my lifestyle, it's something I was born with. I was like this since I was 5 years old, at least. You blame me for not being open minded to others suggestions but listen to you judging someone with a disorder you obviously have no clue about. Here is a good page to read if you care...you might know someone in your personal life with this problem and i'd hate to have them belittled by you too: http://www.circadiansleepdisorders.o...DSPS-QandA.php

[GaiaGoddess]

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So since you have access online to your account add up what you spent during those 3 pay periods of $1535, $1478, and $1478. You made $4491. You say you can see in your statement where all your money is going. What were your total expenses during that time?

I don't have the time to copy down every single expense from the last 2 months, i'm catching up as quick as I can and then I need to get to bed because I head back to ND tomorrow. I might have time while i'm in my hotel to do it but I dont think it matters.

You are spending a lot more than you need to IMO. You cannot afford the hotel stays. You can’t afford $500 on Christmas gifts, birthday, mothers day, fathers days, or siblings birthdays. You should be spending about $800 or less a month on expenses and saving a whole lot more.

I can't NOT afford the hotel stays...like I said I do it for mental health reasons, and I am also forced to do it to accommodate my sleeping schedule. I am also not going to risk my life driving in snow or driving when i'm too tired. Those are 3 very strong points that even alone would be enough to make me get hotels. They might not be valid reasons to you but to me they are.

The link from the U.S. Census Bureau is only considering American Adults from the ages of 18-80. Still the point is that there’s a lot of people (1/3 of Americans) who rent. The other 1/3 are buying homes but don’t have them paid off yet.

Buying a house, RV, etc. doesn’t mean a person actually owns it until that note is paid off. The same thing goes with your friends. They may live in houses but they don’t own them unless the houses are paid off. Do you see?

Yes but i'm not concerned with whether or not their houses are paid off, the point I was making is they live in their own homes. I wouldn't even care if I had to make payments every month as long as I could afford it. That's what I did for 3 years when I owned that house with that guy years ago.

[cardtrick]

Most people have suggested things I've already thought of and tried, that's how I know they don't work. Like i said, I turned the ideas down to myself first, it isn't just because it's coming from other people too.



I guess we'll have to agree to disagree that every human being deserves a place to live. It could be easily done too if the world wasn't so screwed up. There are more vacant foreclosed houses sitting around than there are homeless people. But the world is ran by money, not human decency.



I find it pretty sad that you don't consider mental health a bare essential. I do what I need to do to keep myself from wanting to commit suicide. And you know as well as I do that tons of people working minimum wage living off welfare spend money on drugs, alchohol and cigarettes. I don't smoke or do drugs and I only drink when i'm at a party or at the bar or a wedding. And I don't even do it every month either.



Almost no savings?! How is $12,000 almost nothing? I feel rich with this much money. I am sorry I wasn't able to save money at my part time minimum wage jobs!



Now you're just plain insulting me. If it matters, the reason i'm single is because I don't want to get married. I was almost engaged in the past and realized I didn't want to go through with it. I was just involved with a man at work for a year and a half up until he quit last month. I have broken up with most of the guys i've dated. I don't even know why I should have to defend myself on this subject! I have been told i'm "one of the rare hard to find good girls" so I'm not going to let a stranger on the internet make me feel bad about myself.



Why can't you just accept that others have different opinions on the world? I am far from the only person with the same views.



True, but it doesn't mean you are doomed to a ****ty life without college, either! I may not own a home right now but I haven't lost hope I will find a way to get to my goal.



I didn't say alcohol was the only thing that helps, I said it's the only thing that has helped ME.



Because I didn't come in here for help with my anxiety problems, I came in here to find out what other options I didn't find yet can help me get a place with the money I have right now. I didn't come in here thinking I was going to waste anyone's time, but now I see i'm really wasting mine.



This isn't about my lifestyle, it's something I was born with. I was like this since I was 5 years old, at least. You blame me for not being open minded to others suggestions but listen to you judging someone with a disorder you obviously have no clue about. Here is a good page to read if you care...you might know someone in your personal life with this problem and i'd hate to have them belittled by you too: http://www.circadiansleepdisorders.o...DSPS-QandA.php

I like the world just the way it is. A few deserving people don't get the help they need but a lot of slobs also don't get to mooch off hardworking people. And great job stereotyping people on welfare. Apparently you're a saint and those on welfare are using the money to feed their drug addiction.

$12,000 is a drop in the bucket for someone in their 40s.

Poor, uneducated, physically unfit by your own admission, socially insoluble, a deep sense of entitlement, filled with self-pity and just messed up in the head. I'm sure you're a real score for any single guy.

No, you don't have a disability so don't try to hide behind that. It's a disorder. I am told that I have restless leg syndrome. So, I guess shame on you for accusing me of judging you. I'm disabled you know! It's funny how you selectively accept and reject conventional wisdom in a way that validates all the decisions you made in life. You didn't get an education and hence the education system we have in place sucks. Score for you! But then a doctor tells you that you have some disorder that restricts your ability to function and you scoop it all up without question because once again it explains the situation you are in. Scored again!

Enjoy the house!

[cardtrick]

Now you're just plain insulting me. If it matters, the reason i'm single is because I don't want to get married. I was almost engaged in the past and realized I didn't want to go through with it. I was just involved with a man at work for a year and a half up until he quit last month. I have broken up with most of the guys i've dated. I don't even know why I should have to defend myself on this subject! I have been told i'm "one of the rare hard to find good girls" so I'm not going to let a stranger on the internet make me feel bad about myself.

The timelines don't add up. Here's a post you made on the internet only 8 months ago. I could be a complete ass and post a link but this is sufficient.

"It always makes me feel better when I hear of someone who has it worse, so this might help you. I'm 41 and have only had one boyfriend my entire life and that was 13 years ago. I pray you don't find yourself at my age with still nothing else to add to your dating resume, because it sucks when you know your youth is gone which is one of the biggest advantages a single person can have."

And from the same place, to verify that this was indeed you,

"I'll just go in order...first I came home from my job where I'm gone for 6 weeks at a time and I come home for 2, and EVERY single time I come home, I find that my mom..... "


There is still time to turn everything around but that's not going to happen for someone who is so inflexible.

[GaiaGoddess]

A few deserving people don't get the help they need but a lot of slobs also don't get to mooch off hardworking people.

I'm not a slob and I DO work hard and you know that, I shouldn't have to defend a fact to death.

And great job stereotyping people on welfare.

lol Like you just did up there? Just because people are on welfare doesn't mean they're mooching. I was only bringing up what they spend their money on, not how or why they got on welfare in the first place. I know people who are on it and they have more issues than me (mental and physical) and one of them even went to college. I'm not making that up, she went for computer stuff. Apparently even a career in technology isn't a guarantee.

Apparently you're a saint and those on welfare are using the money to feed their drug addiction.

Some do, it's a fact, i'm not stereotyping, i'm stating a fact. Yes some drug addicts ARENT on welfare but my only point was EVERYONE spends money on things that others deem unnecessary, even those who barely have an income.

$12,000 is a drop in the bucket for someone in their 40s.

Well maybe you just know more accomplished 40 year olds then. Even my friends who own houses don't have that much in their savings, nor do my friends who don't have a house. My dad told me he had $10,000 saved up so I guess I got my own dad beat in your eyes. My mom doesn't have a savings at all but she doesn't need one because her house is paid off, her vehicle is paid off, and all her income she uses to fix up the house.

Poor, uneducated, physically unfit by your own admission, socially insoluble, a deep sense of entitlement, filled with self-pity and just messed up in the head. I'm sure you're a real score for any single guy.

All those things you listed are either your opinion, an exaggeration, or simply not true. I've had plenty of boyfriends, I don't need to prove it to you.

No, you don't have a disability so don't try to hide behind that. It's a disorder.

Actually it IS a disability under the American Disability Act, section 504. The only reason I didn't claim it is because you have to go through therapy first and with my current job I am unable to alter my schedule, my doctor said it would be much easier if I could just work the night shift since I have such a severe case.

I am told that I have restless leg syndrome. So, I guess shame on you for accusing me of judging you. I'm disabled you know!

Well if we both have a disorder then you should also be able to cure yours by changing your lifestyle!

You didn't get an education and hence the education system we have in place sucks. Score for you!

That isn't why I am against college, I could go further into my reasons but i'm sure you won't listen. I already have gone a little into it, maybe you missed it, but it certainly isn't because I don't have a college education. I have a high school education and I will attack that also.

But then a doctor tells you that you have some disorder that restricts your ability to function and you scoop it all up without question because once again it explains the situation you are in. Scored again!

The doctor didn't tell me like I was trying to find something wrong with me and just took his opinion blindly, I went to HIM. I knew I had this years ago when I discovered what I had actually was a real thing. I ended up in the hospital once from sleep deprivation due to being forced to get up too early too many times, and that doctor referred me to a sleep specialist. I had to get diagnosed to get my hours switched back to nights.

[Gailete]

I didnt know that! I have never gotten anything from any of my other jobs referring to SS, only the factory! I guess I thought minimum wage/part time jobs didn't put money towards SS for you. Or maybe that isn't how it works, I don't know, but every time I get a statement in the mail, the amount never changes. Is there a way you can look it up online somehow?

Unless all the other jobs other than the factory one, including this current one is paying you in cash under the table, you and they have been paying into SS. ALL LEGITIMATE JOBS TAKE OUT SS DEDUCTIONS NO MATTER WHAT THEY PAY AND NO MATTER HOW MANY HOURS YOU WORK! Even if you worked 10 hours a week at McDonalds they take out SS money. Granted not much, but it adds up as a working history. What you have taken out isn't what you will get back out; all money collected from everyone goes into the main SS fund which then pays out as needed to recipients. Somewhere around 4 years ago or so SS stopped sending out the statements about how much you would be entitled to if you became disabled or reached retirement age. In your case with the newer rules SS has set up, your retirement age will be 67. More info at this link http://www.ssa.gov/retirement/1960.html Anyhow now that SS doesn't send out the forms, they want you to check on line (saves thousands of trees I'm sure) at this url http://www.ssa.gov/oact/anypia/anypia.html Understand that at times SS can be a year or two behind in the calculations so if this current job isn't showing yet, it will be. I haven't seen a paycheck in years but on your pay stub SS is listed I believe as Fica and also Medicare. Two line items on your pay stub that show money deductions.

As to the rest of what I suggested and you also had excuses why it wouldn't work, I wish you good luck as you will need it. It is crazy to expect to own your home, even a used mobile home, out on land of your own without people nearby, within a one hour drive to your nephews. I have nieces and nephews I haven't even SEEN and they are school age already! It happens with our fairly mobile society and the fact I can no longer travel. You are going to have to make a decision about whether you want your own place or you want to see your nephews, and of course an 8 months old isn't going to remember you, that is what being a baby is about. I'd be more concerned if he didn't recognize his parents.

Making a living on line isn't just about making and selling things. If I had 48 hours days and didn't need sleep I could be making a very high wage all off of the internet. The jobs are there, but YOU have to go looking for them. Even my autistic son who is completely self-supported (with huge relationship/people issues himself) holds down a full time and part time job AND earns money and gas cards doing surveys on line. He wanted more money coming in so he found some ways to do it. No reason that you can't do the same thing.

I lived in a mobile home park for two years and not ONCE did anyone peek into my windows, what you perceive to be people staring at you is generally people being friendly and keeping an eye on their neighbors, but you see the world differently and use your perceptions to find the reasons for you not to be able to do things. There are thousands of mobile home parks in our country and if they were such rotten places to live, they would be in the news constantly, but they aren’t. The majority of mobile home parks are decent places to live.

You seem to focus too much on what you can't do instead of finding things that you can do. You have an excuse for everything and that will get you nowhere in your hunt for reasonable housing. You seem to want something and have about 1000 roadblocks YOU have set up preventing you from getting what you say you want. You don't even bother looking into things or keeping up with the news enough to know that all employers take out SS from your paychecks. Open your eyes to the possibilities that are out there instead of ignoring the world.

[Eagle]

@ GaiaGoddess

So since you have access online to your account add up what you spent during those 3 pay periods of $1535, $1478, and $1478. You made $4491. You say you can see in your statement where all your money is going. What were your total expenses during that time?

I don't have the time to copy down every single expense from the last 2 months, i'm catching up as quick as I can and then I need to get to bed because I head back to ND tomorrow. I might have time while i'm in my hotel to do it but I dont think it matters.

My question was what were your total expenses in the last 3 pay periods or past 2 months. It should take you less than 15-20 minutes to do so.

To me, I think this thread is simply about getting attention. Solutions and alternatives have been presented. As others have pointed out they have been rejected and rationalized. That is unfortunate.

I wish you the best. I hope you achieve your dreams.

[dawnwes]

I strongly suggest you go see someone about some of these issues. I know that may sound like a criticism, but it isn't meant to be. A life coach or career counselor or even a therapist may offer you some help in these areas.

I won't rehash what others have said because there is no need. It has been said.

[hamchan]

Face blindness and dyscalculia are not terribly uncommon. Most people just don't realize that's what they have. Usually they just think they are bad at math, bad with faces, get lost easily, etc.

[GaiaGoddess]

Unless all the other jobs other than the factory one, including this current one is paying you in cash under the table, you and they have been paying into SS. ALL LEGITIMATE JOBS TAKE OUT SS DEDUCTIONS NO MATTER WHAT THEY PAY AND NO MATTER HOW MANY HOURS YOU WORK! Even if you worked 10 hours a week at McDonalds they take out SS money. Granted not much, but it adds up as a working history. What you have taken out isn't what you will get back out; all money collected from everyone goes into the main SS fund which then pays out as needed to recipients. Somewhere around 4 years ago or so SS stopped sending out the statements about how much you would be entitled to if you became disabled or reached retirement age. In your case with the newer rules SS has set up, your retirement age will be 67. More info at this link http://www.ssa.gov/retirement/1960.html Anyhow now that SS doesn't send out the forms, they want you to check on line (saves thousands of trees I'm sure) at this url http://www.ssa.gov/oact/anypia/anypia.html Understand that at times SS can be a year or two behind in the calculations so if this current job isn't showing yet, it will be. I haven't seen a paycheck in years but on your pay stub SS is listed I believe as Fica and also Medicare. Two line items on your pay stub that show money deductions.

Well that would explain why i haven't gotten a statement in a while! Thanks for the links, i'm curious to find out what my new amount is!

It is crazy to expect to own your home, even a used mobile home, out on land of your own without people nearby, within a one hour drive to your nephews.f

I never said I need my own land, I'm perfectly fine living in a trailer park. They do have perks, some of them have pools, community centers, areas for kids to play, etc.

I have nieces and nephews I haven't even SEEN and they are school age already! It happens with our fairly mobile society and the fact I can no longer travel. You are going to have to make a decision about whether you want your own place or you want to see your nephews, and of course an 8 months old isn't going to remember you, that is what being a baby is about. I'd be more concerned if he didn't recognize his parents.

My older nephew knew who I was when he was a baby, I used to babysit him and I saw him a few times a week, trust me I can tell the difference in how the 2 react to me.

Making a living on line isn't just about making and selling things. If I had 48 hours days and didn't need sleep I could be making a very high wage all off of the internet. The jobs are there, but YOU have to go looking for them. Even my autistic son who is completely self-supported (with huge relationship/people issues himself) holds down a full time and part time job AND earns money and gas cards doing surveys on line. He wanted more money coming in so he found some ways to do it. No reason that you can't do the same thing.

I know there are ways to make money online, I have checked into that before. I spent a few years trying to find a way to make enough to make it worth my trouble. I checked into writing jobs, and even the people who did make money didn't make a lot and said you still need a normal job too. I tried having my own website using ads, I had it for a year and it didn't work. I didn't have time anymore after I started working again.

I lived in a mobile home park for two years and not ONCE did anyone peek into my windows, what you perceive to be people staring at you is generally people being friendly and keeping an eye on their neighbors, but you see the world differently and use your perceptions to find the reasons for you not to be able to do things. There are thousands of mobile home parks in our country and if they were such rotten places to live, they would be in the news constantly, but they aren’t. The majority of mobile home parks are decent places to live.

You don't need to defend trailer parks to me, I am fine with living in one, provided that I feel safe when i'm there. Some are exactly like neighborhoods with homes and some are literally like a dirt patch with a bunch of them just thrown on there crammed as tight as they can get them. One was almost destroyed when a meth lab was found in one of them. You really get what your lot rent is paying for. It's also about location. Bigger nicer cities have amazing trailer parks but you are paying a few hundred dollars more.

You seem to focus too much on what you can't do instead of finding things that you can do. You have an excuse for everything and that will get you nowhere in your hunt for reasonable housing. You seem to want something and have about 1000 roadblocks YOU have set up preventing you from getting what you say you want.

Well the only reason I have a lot of roadblocks is because i've already been to the point where everyone is telling me to go. Years ago I already did all this research. I started excited and with a lot of hope. I spent years researching every idea I had. I am just far enough along now to know what options would work and which ones wouldn't. The ones that will work I just need more money to make happen, that's all. The question isn't what can I do, but what can I do NOW. It's only an urgent matter because I need to get out of my mom's house ASAP to save my mental health from affecting my physical health.

You don't even bother looking into things or keeping up with the news enough to know that all employers take out SS from your paychecks. Open your eyes to the possibilities that are out there instead of ignoring the world.

I am telling you everything i've done, I don't know where you're getting the idea I don't look into things. That's what i'm best at, researching. And with the issue of SS, why would the money i'm getting in 20 years matter NOW? That is why I have been focusing on things I can do NOW, I dont have time to think about things that aren't affecting me yet.

[GaiaGoddess]

My question was what were your total expenses in the last 3 pay periods or past 2 months. It should take you less than 15-20 minutes to do so.

It's the same number I have posted before, so there's no point in wasting time adding it all up one item at a time.

To me, I think this thread is simply about getting attention. Solutions and alternatives have been presented. As others have pointed out they have been rejected and rationalized. That is unfortunate.

Attention? Why would I create a problem for no reason other than to have people talk to me on the internet? If I wanted attention i'd put on a short skirt and walk into a bar. As i've said before, I'm trying to see if there was something I hadn't thought of yet, as I have already explained that i've already thought of a lot of ideas myself and "rejected" them myself, although that isn't the word i'd use. Some options just don't work for whatever reason, it isn't my fault.

I wish you the best. I hope you achieve your dreams.

Thanks.

[GaiaGoddess]

I strongly suggest you go see someone about some of these issues. I know that may sound like a criticism, but it isn't meant to be. A life coach or career counselor or even a therapist may offer you some help in these areas.

I would try seeing someone professional but like i've said already, I am only home for a few days every other month, when you see a therapist they want you there at least once a week.

[GaiaGoddess]

you can stay permananmtley at a youth hostel for cheap lol,

lol Oh yeah, if you have no belongings and no desire to have a "home". I want a home for many reasons, not just a place to sleep. I want to be able to grow my own food. I want peace and quiet and to be able to sleep during the day without people around me. Hostels are cool for the people they are meant for, i'm just not one of those people.

[Petunia 100]

Do you have friends or relatives who own land? If so, perhaps an arrangement where you put a mobile home or RV on their property and paid them a reasonable rent might work out nicely for both of you.

[GaiaGoddess]

Do you have friends or relatives who own land? If so, perhaps an arrangement where you put a mobile home or RV on their property and paid them a reasonable rent might work out nicely for both of you.

My friends' land is all in town not in the country, they don't have room for a trailer in their yard. But moving a mobile home is a huge deal, it costs a few thousand dollars. I would rather live in a park anyway.