Going to a wedding

**snshijuptr** · 10-13-2010, 03:59 PM

Are you sure that this situation is unfavorable to them? Maybe her mom doesn't want to live alone. Maybe the bride-to-be plans to be a stay at home mom, and the unemployment is just her getting a freebie from the government (a questionable, but common moral decision). If the family is living in the mother's home then they probably have no extra room for new towels, pots & pans, etc.

You probably know more about their financial situation that would address these issues, but you should make sure you give her a gift that will be of use and meaningful to the bride and groom, not a gift that you find "appropriate".

**minnie1928** · 10-13-2010, 04:07 PM

I agree on the pots & pans, towels, etc. Mom has more than enough household items, as do they since the previously lived in an apartment prior to moving in with Mom.

**cypher1** · 10-14-2010, 06:43 AM

If this couple had a place previously on their own, and moved back home with parent(s) for whatever reasons, I'm sure they had or have the necessities for living on their own. Meaning their priorities may have changed for not needing kitchenware, etc since at home with mom. Add to the fact they have kids, I'm sure they don;t have as much free time going out, so them being gamers is more convenient for entertainment. It's really no different than them taking cash to buy a new TV or dvd player.
When a couple I know got married a few years ago, they already had everything they needed for apartment, so they built gaming pcs for themselves with the gift money. I always give cash at wedding, let the couple decide what they need/or want instead of being stuck with 5 toasters to return.

**terces** · 10-14-2010, 07:18 AM

If you don't feel right about giving a video game for a gift, how about....

Some momento that commemorates their wedding (picture frame, photo album, wall hanging)
Gift card to a store that doesn't sell video games
Savings bond

**elessar78** · 10-14-2010, 10:00 AM

My friends and I are in our 30s. About half of us still indulge in video games. Although you won't get me paying $60 for a brand new issue of Madden. I paid $7 for my most recent game, an older version of a College Football game. We also manage to maintain household budgets and pay bills on time.

It's a mindless hobby no different than model trains or reading. Sure it's not an elevated pursuit, but who cares?

We got wedding china that still sits in a box in the closet. We get less joy from that than if you got us a video game for the wedding. It's not always about utility.

But a great gift for newlyweds, assuming they're Christian are Christmas ornaments. Practical and almost no newlywed has a nice set to decorate their first tree together.

**cypher1** · 10-14-2010, 12:01 PM

Originally posted by elessar78 View Post

But a great gift for newlyweds, assuming they're Christian are Christmas ornaments. Practical and almost no newlywed has a nice set to decorate their first tree together.

Maybe I'm just old fashioned, but I'd take a copy of Call of Duty: World at War shooting nazi zombies, over Christmas ornaments.

**elessar78** · 10-15-2010, 06:10 AM

Well, I would too. I'm probably the epitome of frugal gamer. I buy old used games either at Craigslist or Gamestop. I paid $70 for my PS2 when I was 22 and paid zero for my PS3.

**charley_alford** · 04-25-2011, 01:41 AM

Go with video games. Hey, that�s what they want so you may as well make them happy. If you�re dead against that then how about toys, books or clothes for the kids? If all else fails, get them a Barnes and Noble gift card. Seems like they could use it.

**khosta** · 04-27-2011, 07:59 AM

Wow! Video games!??! They don't have a registry or anything!?!? Get them a poster of their favorite vide game, hahah! On a serious note... I would just get them some household items or kitchenware. :/

**MonkeyMama** · 04-27-2011, 09:15 AM

Personally? I would just give them cash.

Video games sound more useful to me than China.

Seriously. My husband is a gamer (he is 35). Video games are a permanent fixture on his gift wish lists. Throw in a place with nowhere to store a pile of household goods (& already having them), I honestly think video games would be more useful.

In our household? Video games are cheap entertainment. (Mostly bought used or given as gifts).

I am also not so sure on the sentiment based on the wishes of the giftees. Knowing they were living at home and unemployed, you were willing to give them cash. Thus, I'd just give them cash. Unless you can think of something they really NEED more than that. IT didn't seem judgement set in until the video games. I think it is a fair request given the situation. (Asking for cash is usually tacky). Sounds like they could use cash more than anything.

**nick__45** · 04-27-2011, 10:19 AM

I was scammed out of 50 dollars in wedding gift card and I ended up not even liking the person that invite me to their wedding, which I didn't attend due to schedule conflict. From that point on, I turn down all invitation and no gifts unless that person has momentary impact on me such as bosses. Everyone else can keep their events to themselves.

**mom-from-missouri** · 04-27-2011, 10:27 PM

Originally posted by nick__45 View Post

I was scammed out of 50 dollars in wedding gift card and I ended up not even liking the person that invite me to their wedding, which I didn't attend due to schedule conflict. From that point on, I turn down all invitation and no gifts unless that person has momentary impact on me such as bosses. Everyone else can keep their events to themselves.

Grump.

If you didn't like them, why did you send a gift???

**minnie1928** · 04-28-2011, 09:02 PM

Originally posted by MonkeyMama View Post

Personally? I would just give them cash.

We ended up giving them cash.

I think it's being split 50/50 in the divorce. Yep, they're getting divorced already...

**disneysteve** · 04-29-2011, 05:08 AM

Originally posted by minnie1928 View Post

We ended up giving them cash.

I think it's being split 50/50 in the divorce. Yep, they're getting divorced already...

What a surprise. Who would have thought that an unemployed woman and a guy who plays a lot of video games, both living in the woman's mother's house, with 2 young kids prior to marriage wouldn't be a recipe for a long and happy marriage.

Going to a wedding