how much do you really spend on a wedding gift?

[pearlieq]

Re: how much do you really spend on a wedding gift?

Around here it's the norm to offer gifts for both the shower and the wedding. For the shower you give something off the registry and for the wedding you give money. It works out very well and I really like that system.

I'll usually spend about $75 on a shower gift and another $75 check for the wedding. More if someone is close to me, less (but never lower than $25 for shower/$50 for wedding check) if we're not close.

[living_in_oz]

Re: how much do you really spend on a wedding gift?

$50 to $100???!! You guys must have more money than me!LOL For a VERY close family member I MIGHT spend $50(if they haven't lived together for like 3 years already!!GRRR, that's a pet peeve of mine!). If it's just a family friend that I feel like I really need to go to a wedding for, it's more like $20 or $25. I can't spend more money than that. I refuse to take money away from my family just to pay for a gift for someone else. Generally, I can find a pretty nice gift for $25 or less.

[MarianneJ]

Re: how much do you really spend on a wedding gift?

If I am going to give cash (which is when I can afford it), then I will give $100 - or more if I am close to the person and I can afford it. Anything less and it wouldn't even cover my meal at the reception. I think that is poor taste, although I know plenty will disagree.

If I can't afford to give cash, I will find a meaningful gift in my price range - usually a personalized throw or something I know the couple will enjoy.

I try to be as generous as possible since I know my DH and I really appreciated our family and friends' generosity when we were married.
My sweet cousin and his wife were married last summer, and I waited to give them a gift because we could not afford to be generous at that time. As soon as our tax refund comes in they will be getting a nice surprise in the mail!

[tgavin71]

Re: how much do you really spend on a wedding gift?

If I was doing all the work and not invited to the ceremony I wouldn't spend any money on a present. In fact it is they who should be paying you.
I'd be insulted if I was only invited to one. Its like saying. "Your good enough to come and party with us but not to witness our marriage".
I wouldn't go full stop. There you go problem solved.

[kealina]

Re: how much do you really spend on a wedding gift?

i haven't really been to any weddings but i think for close family $100, more distant relatives/close friends about $50-75 and everybody else decline. i wouldn't go to showers unless it was family. i would get a small gift for most showers. of course this is assuming it's in the budget and also assuming it's local and easy to get to. then again, like a coleroo mentioned it depends on the amount of weddings and things i would go to... luckily, our family is fairly small and we only choose to have a few close friends so we know that the amount of weddings we would go to over the next few years is slim if any...

[PrincessPerky]

Re: how much do you really spend on a wedding gift?

Man I wish you'll came to my wedding!

Only person who gave us 100 was gma...the rest of the well to do family was 50 ...all three of em....the remainder were 20 or 25.....or 5 or 10...and one card with 2 dollars in it

we appriciated it all, even the 2...

[tinapbeana]

Re: how much do you really spend on a wedding gift?

My hubby's sister just got married in November - we spent about $80 on gifts, but also had to travel to new york (from south carolina) so we had about another $200 in gas / misc travel expenses.
~ Lisa

OT: WOOHOOO, someone else is on in SC!!

OK, back on topic w/ weddings: gave my sister 300+ photos from her shower, bachelor/bachelorette parties, rehersal & dinner, ceremony, & reception (prints and on a CD). my cost was under $50, but she would have paid much more to have a photographer at all 4 events (not to mention 300+ prints).

[jodi]

Re: how much do you really spend on a wedding gift?

We spend $50 for the wedding gift, about $30 for the shower unless it's a close friend or relative. We spent about $125 for my brother and SIL's gifts this summer. I also spend a little more on those who have been very generous to us in the past, such as my cousin (plus the wedding was in Long Island, so I know it cost a fortune).
We got gifts ranging from $10 to $1000 (a very wealthy relative) at our wedding, but nearly all the gifts were in the range $25-40/person, $50-75/couple.

[lrjohnson]

Re: how much do you really spend on a wedding gift?

If I am going to give cash (which is when I can afford it), then I will give $100 - or more if I am close to the person and I can afford it. Anything less and it wouldn't even cover my meal at the reception. I think that is poor taste, although I know plenty will disagree.

Yup, you are right. I'm disagreeing here. I've only been to two weddings as an adult, so I don't have tons of experience. But I certainly would never consider a cash gift to need to cover the cost of the food! I think it's very tacky when people expect gifts to cover the meal somehow.

One, $100 is a lot of money for food. I was at a wedding with excellent food; the cost was $6.50 per guest. I gave a $150 cash gift in that case to help with the honeymoon-I'm not saying to be cheap-but I'm thinking if someone is having a $100 a plate dinner they need to be able to afford it.

Two, a guest is a guest. If I am part of their life and they are part of mine, they want me to be at a special moment. They are paying for their life event. If I care for them and come, I'll bring something to express my good wishes and caring. It may be costly or not; perhaps it was a very thoughtful or hand crafted gift without a lot of dollars behind it but a lot of time and energy.

(I'm not against people wanting to give a lot; I'm not so down with people expecting.)

[PrincessPerky]

Re: how much do you really spend on a wedding gift?

Ditto LRJohnson...I was going to say It ain't my fault they chose an expensive dinner!

[BCHGRL]

Re: how much do you really spend on a wedding gift?

The last wedding we attended, we gave a frame that I bought at Ross for $14. The frame would cost $50 in a normal department store. I gave a nice gift without looking cheap!

[threebeansalad]

Re: how much do you really spend on a wedding gift?

We give cash, ~$75-$100. If we were invited to hundreds of wedding a year, I would reconsider, but we're not.

[markio26]

Re: how much do you really spend on a wedding gift?

let me explain... she is getting married OCTOBER 08, 2008, next year.... everything is planned, most has been paid for... the hall, kilts for the guys, shaws for the gals, are still undecided... she went to a class reunion 2 yrs. ago, and hooked up with her fiancee... she has changed some, since going with him... he is working in another state, they fly twice a month to be together.... they only want close family and pals to attend the wedding, which is gonna have bag pipes, catholic wedding.... i am not offended, it was my idea to make it special for family and close friends... i am more like her internet pal, and we hook up a couple times a year and go out, and such... i live 2 hrs. from her... but, she and her fiance emails me too, tell me everything and anything... i keep it to myself and they are head over heels in love.. i think they should marry soon, and then do the ceremony later... reason being both remaining widows, are in poor health... from both sides.....
i am happy to assist, the dj's will be my son and nephew... pix into dvd's.. son will do for them, decorating, son will do for them, etc... for free, just his costs, as a favor to me..........
the reception we hope will be at a country club, if we can get it booked that far in advance.....she doesn't have anyone too smart to help her... her closest friend is a co-worker who is divorced with a teen age son and she is a lil inexperienced with talking to ppl.
thanks for all the comments, i appreciate it.......

[sakigt]

Re: how much do you really spend on a wedding gift?

$30 for a friend

$500 on my best friend's wedding. I was the maid of honor. $200 on the dress, $200 on the dinner/drinks to get her and her other friends to loosen up during her bachelorette party (btw, it worked wonders) and $100 or so on the gift and other little things I needed.

Yea. That was a rough month. It was worth it, though. Sometimes ya gotta do what ya gotta do.

[trillium]

Re: how much do you really spend on a wedding gift?

Last wedding I went to, I made a handmade gift. While not as $$$ as some of the other gifts that were offered by other friends, it held a special place in the bride and grooms heart because of the TLC attached to making it.

What "it" was, was a 6-hr knitted throw with fringe in jewel tones. It turned out to be such a special thing that when I visited the newly-weds at their home, it was the only gift I saw displayed in their living room.

Total yarn cost was $40 and 6 hrs of my time


Some other gifties I've seen/used...
When a dear friend who was a scrap booker and cook got married, I paired up with her mom and got old family recipes. We put together a keepsake scrapbook that had old family recipes, new recipes, and such and packaged it with a set of new kitchen utensiles, bowls, and measuring spoons/cups. Took alot of time in the book, but her DH loves to cook as well so it was a good deal.

Gift baskets of food seems to always be a winner. A cousin of mine was going to Italy for his honeymoon... but the flight wasn't leaving until the following night after the wedding. Friends got together and made an italian themed picnic basket (wine, cheeses, italian meats, bread, etc.) and presented it to the bride and groom so they could start their Italian honeymoon back at the hotel with a picnic...

Just a few ideas