Starting Fresh - Tired of just paying bills

**Nutria** · 04-11-2016, 02:39 PM

This is pretty tough. It's good that you'd already categorized your spending.

PAY CASH (either Dead Presidents in envelopes/jars or Debit Card and a spreadsheet) for EVERYTHING.

First you need to cut this:

80 - Kids Savings
60 - Gym
Kids Haircuts - you need pro cuts. They need clippers.
40 - Cats - Food, or something more?
20 - Netflix + Hulu One has to go.
20 - Audible (Audio Books) Borrow from the public library.
20 - Christmas Fund - Maybe start funding it after Kay's CC is paid off.

Note how I left off DW's makeup.

$320 is really low for a family of four for a whole month. Are the kids eating Ramen?

250 - Car Insurance (Mine)
160 - Car Insurance (Wife's)

Are these the best deals you can find?

Take $540 from the EF and the $240+$240+$80 and put it on the Kay's CC.

Are you currently paying a bit over minimum on all the cards? If so, then Avalanche the Kay's CC by paying minimum on all the other cards to kill the horrible Kay's card first ASAP. Then the Walmart, then CapOne.

Is your deferred SL actually accumulating interest? If so, that must be dealt with next.

Each bi-annual (quarterly?) extra $800 paycheck also needs to go towards the "current" debt.

Eventually you'll start getting 0% balance xfer offers. Take them so as to pay off other CCs quicker.

Whatever happens, it's going to be a very lean 4-5 years. I hope your wife is on board with you on this!

**feh** · 04-12-2016, 05:37 AM

Originally posted by hehateme000 View Post

Any guidance would be really appreciated.

Your commute is killing you. Both in consumption of time and financially.

I wouldn't think hotel management would be something that would require such a deathly commute. Can you find a job closer to home?

**tripods68** · 04-12-2016, 06:59 AM

You are bleeding--out of control!

I recommend for you and your wife read "Total Money Makeover" by Dave Ramsey. This gives you a real foundation where to start tackling your debt & spending problem

The Total Money Makeover – Updated and Expanded Edition

http://www.daveramsey.com/store/the-total-money-makeover/prodtmmoclassic.html?ectid=gaw.publishing-ttmmo5

Get the expanded and updated edition of one of Dave Ramsey’s best money books, The Total Money Makeover—a simple personal finance plan to beat debt and build wealth.

**bjl584** · 04-12-2016, 07:43 AM

I'm going to assume that 18 months ago when you were on this forum a lot of folks gave you tons of good advice about cutting spending, increasing income, switching jobs, etc. etc. etc. Did you take any of their advice and make any changes, or did you just carry on?

Anything that was most likely already said to you is still good advice. I'd go back and search for your original thread that you posted and re-read it. Put some of that advice into practice this time around.

You're bleeding all over the place. There are tons of places that you can cut spending TODAY. Some of the others already made some suggestions.

**tripods68** · 04-12-2016, 08:02 AM

Originally Posted by hehateme000 View Post
Any guidance would be really appreciated

Have you and your wife discussed or sat down together about your finances? Do you have a written budget?

**Jluke** · 04-12-2016, 08:32 AM

What improvements have you made since you last posted on here?

From what I see, you really have mastered the art of monthly MINIMUM payments...

Stop using debt to live. if you don't have money in the bank you can't afford it.

updated: **cars are underwater; don't sell**

do you really need $120 for food during a commute? If this is food that you pick up at a convenience store, STOP immediately. If you really need this, buy it at the grocery store. Still surprising that $200 for food for the family but $120 for your commute? must be fast food type of stuff.

Move closer to your job or find a job closer to home. Have you considered leaving California?

Cut the spending that nutria suggested.

And finally, eliminate the debt one at a time and don't go into debt any further.

**Nutria** · 04-12-2016, 08:55 AM

Originally posted by Jluke View Post

sell one car, get a cheaper one. replace both if you really want to get rid of debt.

When a car is "underwater", does replacing it really make financial sense? You'd have to buy someone else'd old problems; not only would repair costs eat into the EF, but when it's in the shop it's unavailable for use.

**Jluke** · 04-12-2016, 08:58 AM

Originally posted by Nutria View Post

When a car is "underwater", does replacing it really make financial sense? You'd have to buy someone else'd old problems; not only would repair costs eat into the EF, but when it's in the shop it's unavailable for use.

oh right... I didn't see that line until now with the cars being underwater. should have known better.

living the American dream

**hehateme000** · 04-12-2016, 09:45 AM

Thank you guys for the replies.

Nutria - Everything you said I am doing. So I have $1100 from the savings that I am going to pay toward the Kay's CC today. It does feel really good to know that I am eliminating $1100 of debt just like that! The only thing I may keep is Audible which is how I get my audio books for my commute (might as well learn and grow while I'm driving). Also I will ask my insurance company if I can add my wife's car onto my deal and maybe get a discount. My SL is mixed with subsidized/unsubsidized. And I think I just got a 0% offer in the mail - I will go dig that back up!

Feh - My commute is to SF, and I live in Sacramento. I could try to find something here, but even taking out the costs of the commute, I would still have to make a certain amount that I don't believe I could make without working a second job. My job is union and in SF so the pay is worth it...but it does suck.

Tripods - Thank you I will check that out. And yes my wife is willing to do what I want

bjl - I did re-read the posts and it is hard because I was so adamant on buying a house (which i did, and already sold last year). Now my situation is solely just on getting out of debt and saving, nothing to do with a house.

jluke - You are right. I am actually really good at making budgets and making payments and staying on top of it, but I do a bad job with getting out of debt overall. If I can afford it, then I make it work. But I am cutting it too close to where now I realize I need to change things. So if that means no gym, HULU, or saving for Christmas then fine. The $120 for my commute is because I am so busy I always pick up snacks and fast food. I do realize this is a bad habit, which I will try to change. I still want to have SOMETHING in case I am hungry on my 2 hour commute home, but $120 does seem excessive.

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I am going to talk to my wife about our income as well. I budget for her to make $400 every 2 weeks but sometimes she makes a lot more. She also works 1x a week as a server so whatever tips she makes is her spending money. I want to talk to her about when she makes more than $400 and less than $400. If she makes more, then that extra money can go toward our first priority debt (Kay's CC for now). If she makes less, then she can pay the rest with her tips. And if she makes a LOT more, then maybe she can keep some of that as like a bonus. I don't want to make her feel like I am telling her 100% what to do, but I do want her to be on-board with what direction we are going and how dedicated we can be together.

The good thing is that I am growing as a person every year, and realizing the importance of money now is crucial. So I don't believe I will make the same mistakes as I did a couple years ago. Paying off our cars, Kay's CC, walmart card, and getting rid of some bills pretty much opens up around $1500/month. I cant wait to pay off the debt and start a 401k, but one step at a time

**Jluke** · 04-12-2016, 10:18 AM

Originally posted by hehateme000 View Post

jluke - I do realize this is a bad habit, which I will try to change. I still want to have SOMETHING in case I am hungry on my 2 hour commute home, but $120 does seem excessive.

My commute is 1hr 20min one way... Stock up on food and drinks at the grocery store and try to keep it healthy, if possible. I like MetRx bars; crackers, etc. You'll save a lot just by planning ahead.

**Nutria** · 04-12-2016, 10:34 AM

Originally posted by hehateme000 View Post

I am going to talk to my wife about our income as well.

Hmm. She's not already in on the discussions and the plan? (I showed my wife everything on a spreadsheet, so that she understood in black and white and red why I made the budget decisions that I did.)

Even now when we're effectively out of debt, I still send her a weekly or bi-weekly email saying:

Code:

Here's how much we have left to spend this month on:
Food:        $xxx
Fuel:        $yyy
Restaurant:  $zzz
Other:       $aaa

Thus, it's not "me" telling her what to do, it's Math telling her what to do...

I budget for her to make $400 every 2 weeks but sometimes she makes a lot more. She also works 1x a week as a server so whatever tips she makes is her spending money. I want to talk to her about when she makes more than $400 and less than $400. If she makes more, then that extra money can go toward our first priority debt (Kay's CC for now). If she makes less, then she can pay the rest with her tips. And if she makes a LOT more, then maybe she can keep some of that as like a bonus. I don't want to make her feel like I am telling her 100% what to do, but I do want her to be on-board with what direction we are going and how dedicated we can be together.

Are you finances co-mingled? (Does she deposit her pay into a common checking account? Married/children/living in the same house: maybe I'm just so old and patriarchal that I assume that's naturally what everyone does, even though I know it's not.)

But if you're afraid that she'll feel like you're telling her what to do, then it doesn't sound like they are, and that you have to convince her to pony up for household expenses.

Does she pay more than lip service to the need to get out of debt?

**Nutria** · 04-12-2016, 10:37 AM

Originally posted by hehateme000 View Post

The $120 for my commute is because I am so busy I always pick up snacks and fast food. I do realize this is a bad habit, which I will try to change. I still want to have SOMETHING in case I am hungry on my 2 hour commute home, but $120 does seem excessive.

If you work 22 days/month, that's $5.45/day. Really excessive.

**breathemusic** · 04-12-2016, 12:28 PM

You mentioned keeping the Audible, but don't forget that libraries often have ebooks as well, so maybe check that out and see how their selection is. Though ultimately I feel like $10 a month isn't going to make or break the budget (you just can't keep thinking that over and over again until it's actually much more).

I think if you have an alternate work route that can save you that one expensive toll, it would be worth it as long as it's not making your commute really hellish. Heck, you can even check google maps every morning and just take the other commute SOME of the time depending on traffic or something.

Once you get 1 or 2 of those debt items paid off, you'll really see things start to snowball and it will help a ton. If nothing else, if you just have a month where an unexpected expense comes up, at least you might have the money to afford it. So that's good!

**snafu** · 04-12-2016, 03:34 PM

OP, the numbers you've offered tell us you are living way beyond your means. Your numbers and standard of living don't match. You don't tell yourselves 'NO,' and there is no one else reigning in costs. Your take home needs to subtract work expenses like commute, tolls, auto maintenance /operation, parking, and junk food spends. Your income is further eroded by all the dollars earned that go to interest. How many dollars cumulatively goes to interest on student loans, interest on two car loans, interest on each of the CCs? Multiply the monthly figure by 12 and get a realistic picture of how much income is left to apply to bills and standard of living.

You and DW can pull yourselves out of this mess of debt but it will take focus, cause scrimping, and seriously lower your standard of living short term. You've been offered realistic suggestions...I'm confident you can get past this bad patch. When do you anticipate finishing your degree?

Starting Fresh - Tired of just paying bills