In serious debt, need advice

**Weird Tolkienish Figure** · 09-25-2014, 11:49 AM

Originally posted by Wendy 7474 View Post

I am embarrassed and ashamed to share about myself, but am ready to start getting my life on track. 3 years ago, I found myself in a homeless shelter after leaving an abusive husband. I left with nothing, I had never worked before, and I didn't feel like I could offer my children anything, (I had been so beaten down), that I gave my ex custody. (I still get them as much as I want...just no support, etc). I have had a lot of medical issues, but no insurance. I have countless medical bills that I don't even open anymore, I just throw away, because of fear, being overwhelmed. My credit is shot. Fast forward to now....I am not the same woman I was, then. I am no longer afraid of "life". I have busted my butt to get through nursing school and become something. I am now working as an LPN and will graduate as an RN in December. I finally have my own apartment, and make "just" barely enough to pay all of my bills on time (nothing on my overdue, collections, etc)....just my living expenses, car, groceries, insurance, etc. It has taken me a long time to make enough $$ monthly to pay these things, so I am proud of myself. I cant get a second job right now, due to my final quarter of nursing school, but will be able to pick up extra hours beginning in January, and then once I take my boards, I will get a pay increase of between $5-9 hourly. I am trying to set goals, and plan for my future, so once January gets here, I want to start getting out of debt. I just have no idea where to start. I am afraid to even look at my credit report, I think last I checked my credit was just under 500!!!

I just never cared before, I was only trying to survive. Now, I CARE and don't know how to dig myself out.....does any one have any advice for me, where to start? Should I even start looking at things now, or should I wait until I am actually able to start paying on things. I am overwhelmed, but ready to tackle this mess I have gotten myself into.

This is more than I have experienced, but you should commend yourself for wanting to take charge and stop running from this issue.

First I would go to https://www.annualcreditreport.com/index.action and get a credit report from a single agency (there are three credit agencies: Transunion, Experion, and Equifax).

Second I would go to "CreditKarma" and sign up.

List your debts one by one if you can. You may have questions about what the credit reports means. Credit Karma does a really good job of pointing out where you credit problems lay.

Get an excel spreadsheet and list all your debts. Next to your debts you need to find the interest rates for all your debts.

Organize everything, get all your ducks in a row so to speak.

Remember that money problems are the easy problems to solve in life, there's no reason to be scared about any of this.

If you want to post your debts one at a time in here, that's fine, but please make sure not to post any personal information like SS numbers or account numbers.

Take it all one step at a time, we've all been here.

**frugalredhead** · 09-25-2014, 04:59 PM

First of all, kudos to you for getting out of an abusive relationship! I hope this isn't overstepping my bounds, but how is the ex with your kids? Is he abusive towards them as well? If so, you need to consult a lawyer about getting them back in your custody.

As for the finances, it sounds like you have come a long way and are on the right track to increasing your income. Credit takes time to build back up. Just keep making your payments, don't carry balances on your credit cards (you didn't mention if you have CC debt?)

There is absolutely nothing to be embarrassed or ashamed about. I have a truckload of credit card debt and not even close to a good reason for it. Just irresponsible spending and the desire for instant gratification. Now THAT is something to be embarrassed about!

Good luck and welcome to the forums!

**bjl584** · 09-26-2014, 02:53 AM

Originally posted by Wendy 7474 View Post

I am embarrassed and ashamed to share about myself, but am ready to start getting my life on track. 3 years ago, I found myself in a homeless shelter after leaving an abusive husband. I left with nothing, I had never worked before, and I didn't feel like I could offer my children anything, (I had been so beaten down), that I gave my ex custody. (I still get them as much as I want...just no support, etc). I have had a lot of medical issues, but no insurance. I have countless medical bills that I don't even open anymore, I just throw away, because of fear, being overwhelmed. My credit is shot. Fast forward to now....I am not the same woman I was, then. I am no longer afraid of "life". I have busted my butt to get through nursing school and become something. I am now working as an LPN and will graduate as an RN in December. I finally have my own apartment, and make "just" barely enough to pay all of my bills on time (nothing on my overdue, collections, etc)....just my living expenses, car, groceries, insurance, etc. It has taken me a long time to make enough $$ monthly to pay these things, so I am proud of myself. I cant get a second job right now, due to my final quarter of nursing school, but will be able to pick up extra hours beginning in January, and then once I take my boards, I will get a pay increase of between $5-9 hourly. I am trying to set goals, and plan for my future, so once January gets here, I want to start getting out of debt. I just have no idea where to start. I am afraid to even look at my credit report, I think last I checked my credit was just under 500!!!

I just never cared before, I was only trying to survive. Now, I CARE and don't know how to dig myself out.....does any one have any advice for me, where to start? Should I even start looking at things now, or should I wait until I am actually able to start paying on things. I am overwhelmed, but ready to tackle this mess I have gotten myself into.

There is nothing to be embarrassed or ashamed about here. Congratulations to you for getting your life in order and getting out of an abusive situation.

I think a good place to start would be to create a budget. Start by tracking all of your expenses and income for a month. Put on paper where every penny goes to. Once you have it all in front of you it will be much easier to start to allocate money toward bills, debts, savings, etc. It will also help you tighten up and trim expenses where needed.

**UpaCreek** · 09-26-2014, 03:47 AM

I know you said you can't get another job b/c of nursing school. DOes this mean you can't put in a little extra time on the side or just can't get a formal second job? The reason I ask is because there are so many elderly needing just a little support..driving them to the store, dr appts, help picking up meds etc. You are in health care-you know how many folks go home and don't have the support they need. Check out Care.com...most of those people pay cash and you can do it as you can. It may be just that little extra cash you need to pay down some bills.

**TheKayla** · 09-26-2014, 11:46 AM

I think you should definitely commend yourself on the progress you've made so far, even if it feels like you're still really behind. Both emotionally and financially you've done quite a lot, you should recognize that and not beat yourself up for where you're at now. Just stepping up and saying you're going to start caring and getting things in order is probably the biggest step. Attitudes build habits, and habits will without a doubt take you to where you want and need to be financially. Think about the progress you could make in the next three years given the same effort!

It sounds like you have the right attitude with picking up a second job to pay off your bills once the semester's over. In the meantime, do you have any belongings you could sell? You could also look up one-time/one-day or temp jobs on craigslist when you do have time, donate plasma, walk dogs, etc? Look for ways to make some extra cash, while working to decrease your expenses. Follow some frugal blogs and gain ideas, there's a wealth of knowledge out there to earn more/spend less.

I'd first get everything in order and make a budget, so you can see where you're at and accurately plan for where you're going. If you feel comfortable then you can post it here and we can help with any suggestions to stretch your dollar. A budget may be tight, but if you can sqeeze an extra $20 even out of it and put it towards debts, it will make a difference.

**UDRogue** · 09-29-2014, 10:23 PM

I posted here with a debt problem and people suggested "You Need A Budget". I bought it and it has helped me a lot. I have only been using it about a month and it has already paid for itself (the cost is $60). It takes some initial learning, but once you get the hang of it, it will give you control over how to organize and handle your debt, your bills, and how to allocate your income to address these things.

I think something like that will help you see the big picture and set goals, and get control.

**LivingAlmostLarge** · 10-02-2014, 10:05 AM

I'm impressed you even got out of a bad situation and moved forward. Congratulations and good luck.

**WillieGearhart** · 10-09-2014, 10:35 PM

Hey, don't worry, you should have to care of your debt, now it is the time to start and do something to clear your debt. First of all make a list of mortgages, personal loans, store cards, credit cards and bank overdrafts.Store cards and credit cards.

**ZERisTHE1** · 10-09-2014, 11:36 PM

Get all of your monthly bills and put them on sticky notes. Put those on the wall in the order of when they need to be paid. Calculate when you get paid and how much needs to go towards bills for that pay period.

Once you can see exactly what has to go out, then you can see how much you have left to create more income streams.

The only way I can think of to get out of major debt, is to get multiple income revenue streams.

**Eagle** · 10-10-2014, 04:53 AM

Just an observation but it's over 2 weeks and the OP (Wendy) hasn't returned to the conversation. Not sure if she will come back to read comments or not...

In serious debt, need advice