Parents - when did you stop giving allowance?

**Coronet** · 10-26-2010, 05:05 AM

I never got an allowance. My parents basically had me do all my weekly chores, help out, etc. to earn money. I was never "given" money per se. If I had been a useful kid that week (i.e. help wash the car, do dishes, make extra effort to help clean up the living room) then if I asked for something, like having them give me money to go to an amusement park with friends, I'd probably get it.

**MonkeyMama** · 10-26-2010, 05:17 AM

I don't have older kids, but we don't plan to give allowances when they can earn their own money (babysitting, mowing lawns, etc.). I suppose it depends how regular the job is. I had a very steady babysitting job when I was 14-ish, so that is when I no longer had an allowance. Certainly not since I turned 16 and could work for a paycheck.

**kork13** · 10-26-2010, 05:18 AM

Originally posted by Coronet View Post

I never got an allowance. My parents basically had me do all my weekly chores, help out, etc. to earn money. I was never "given" money per se. If I had been a useful kid that week (i.e. help wash the car, do dishes, make extra effort to help clean up the living room) then if I asked for something, like having them give me money to go to an amusement park with friends, I'd probably get it.

That's a pretty fair way to explain how it was for me too.

However, to contribute a bit more to the conversation, a friend's family does/did it in an interesting way that I kind of like... They basically sit down with each kid, and set their budget for ALL their personal expenses. Clothes, lunch money, 'entertainment' money, and so on. They're given this amount monthly and are expected to budget their money for the month, and out of it they are responsible for paying for all of their own expenses (outside of family expenses--vacations, groceries/household stuff, etc). Depending on the kid, their age, their responsibilities around the house and toward the family, etc., it could be $50/mo or $200/mo. If they choose to be careful with it, they can save some of it for future use; or, they can spend it all, but cannot ask for a dime more from mom/dad. Basically, it's a way to provide for their kids' needs and give some spending money as well, while also teaching them about managing their money. I think in the future, I'll try to do something similar to this.

**cypher1** · 10-26-2010, 06:10 AM

I stopped getting my allowance at 27, sucks, right?

Growing up I had a chart of choirs to do over the week ($2 per), up until 11 or 12. After that, babysit for others, then part time job at 15. My dad did allowance for us to push budgeting/saving. Didn't have much, but all my money was wasted on candy, comics, and GI Joes for youth.
Random thought, this topic reminds of a favorite episode of the Wonder Years. The main character Kevin Arnold wants to be a caddy, instead of working for his allowance from his frugal dad. At the end he realizes he's working just as hard as his dad, and understands the value of a dollar earned. A classic!

**ea1776** · 10-26-2010, 07:45 AM

I don't have kids or experience with this, but if I were in your shoes I would cut him/her off at the "legal" working age of 16 and declare that the day he/she is legally able to generate his/her own income and therefore doesn't need an allowance. Kids already get "paid" via having a roof over their head and basic needs provided.

**graceful** · 10-26-2010, 08:58 AM

I never had an allowance growing up until I went away to college. Basically, if I needed something, my parents bought it for me. Probably spent the most money on books. Other than that, I didn't have much expenses. I dressed in jeans, tees and sweats. This was before the electronic age, so no purchases there.

I usually got money for birthday, Christmas, and Chinese New Year and had a bank account before I was 7 that I socked away money in. If I really wanted something that wasn't a "basic necessity" that Mom & Dad covered then I paid for it out of my savings.

When I went to college, my parents would give me money periodically when they would see me or deposited it into my bank account. But it would never be a set amount.

My girls are 9 and 11. They don't get an allowance... yet. Not sure if they ever will. But will be re-visited when they start having activities without us. They get money as gifts all the time for birthdays, Christmas, Chinese New Year and pretty much every time their our of town grandparents visit.

They sock it away in their piggy bank until the amount gets ridiculous and I MAKE them deposit it into the bank because I don't want so much cash in the house.

We cover all their necessities and they get plenty of wants for Christmas and birthdays so what else do they need money for? I tried the allowance in the past and it just didn't work for me. It became just another "bill" and I never had the cash on me and they didn't "need" the money. Wound up writing them a check for allowances I "owed" them from the last few weeks. This didn't last long.

If they really want something that isn't what I would consider a necessity, then they have the savings to pay for it even without an allowance. I give them $5 for the book fair at school and they can bring extra if they want out of their piggy banks. DD9 bought $13 more of her own money and spent it all.

DD11 either pocketed the money or bought something under $5 because she is waaaay careful about spending her own money. Lol.

I let them chose 1-2 books at the bookstore when we go, if it is at or above their reading level even though we utilize the library a LOT.

When the girls get older and want to spend money to "hang out" we will re-visit the allowance thing. But until then, we just go ahead and cover all their necessities and if they have other wants, they can "request" them as gifts which they may or may not get. They do HAVE the money to BUY their wants themselves but I guess they never really WANTED something (expensive) enough to spend their own money. LOL.

They actually waited 2-3 years for a DS and only got them this past Christmas because DH didn't want them to have them until they were older.

**disneysteve** · 10-26-2010, 09:09 AM

Originally posted by ea1776 View Post

I don't have kids or experience with this, but if I were in your shoes I would cut him/her off at the "legal" working age of 16 and declare that the day he/she is legally able to generate his/her own income and therefore doesn't need an allowance. Kids already get "paid" via having a roof over their head and basic needs provided.

To be fair, some of her allowance money goes for "basic needs" like toward lunch money. I still feel we should be covering that stuff. But as she inches closer to driving age, I want her to know that there are bigger expenses looming than the occasional t-shirt at Hot Topic or souvenir at Disney World.

She does want to work and is upset that nobody around here will hire her until she is 16 (she has asked at several different places). I want to encourage that ambition without making it seem like I'm punishing her for working by cutting off the money we do give her.

One thing I definitely want to do is help her by doing some type of matching funds to have her start retirement savings young. If she can start funding a Roth at age 16 and get in the habit of doing that regularly, she will have a great start in her financial life going forward.

**bjl584** · 10-26-2010, 11:10 AM

I don't have kids, but as a child I never received an allowance. I did chores around the house but was never paid for it. I did start working part time when I turned 16 though. That was really the first time that I ever had money of my own. Before that, any money that I had was gifted from birthdays, holidays, etc.

**wincrasher** · 10-26-2010, 01:44 PM

Well if you want your kids to have a healthy appreciation for money, then they need to have some.

If they can have a part time job and still manage their studies, then that's great. Giving them the stress of having to earn money to pay for things all kids want, like video games, movie tickets, jeans or even a car, and letting their grades suffer doesn't seem like a great idea to me. Believe me, you have your whole life to be stressed about money.

My parents let me have the occasional part-time job here and there - as long as it didn't affect my schoolwork. But I still got an allowance - even thru my college years. It wasn't much, but I had pocket money to have the typical middle class suburban experiences

. I think I turned out OK.

The statistic now is that only 30% of kids are going to college and having a chance at a comfortable financial life. You want to ensure that your kid is one of those, or the other 70%?

**disneysteve** · 10-26-2010, 05:25 PM

Originally posted by wincrasher View Post

If they can have a part time job and still manage their studies, then that's great. Giving them the stress of having to earn money to pay for things all kids want, like video games, movie tickets, jeans or even a car, and letting their grades suffer doesn't seem like a great idea to me.

I agree 100% and DD knows that. If she wants to get a job, she certainly can, but school always comes first.

**maat55** · 10-26-2010, 05:39 PM

I regret that we never gave allowances, it would have been a good teaching experience for frugality.

**snafu** · 10-27-2010, 09:31 PM

Both sons continued to get allowances through H Sch. to cover clothes and supplies. Each has PT work during the school term; DS 1 ran a snow clearing business until we moved to a condo. Sums earned and gifted are used for high cost extras. DS1 teaches me money management. DS 2 picked up his marks smartly as a result of working with kitchen staff in a trendy restaurant.

**marvholly** · 10-28-2010, 02:59 AM

I did not cut off my kids allowances when they started to work BUT they did have increased financcial responsibilities. We gave them the use of our backup car & made them pay all gas and the increased on insurance because of their age. We also started them on a monthly clothing allowance and made them AU on a credit card while we could oversee & discuss spending as needed.

On the cc: people at work were SHOCKED we did this but it meant they learned to use a cc wisely. both had NO cc debt at college graduation & had several of their own cards.

**disneysteve** · 10-28-2010, 11:00 AM

marvholly, I got my first CC in college and my father cosigned for it. I never did anything stupid with it and it helped establish my credit which came in handy later. I intend to do the same with DD when the time is right.

Parents - when did you stop giving allowance?