So upset I could cry :(

**EEinNJ** · 01-27-2009, 12:33 PM

If it's any encouragement, you have "a great new job" and $2000 in savings. There's a lot of people lately who would like to be in your position. And it sounds like your head is screwed on straight about how much trouble credit cards are, and paying off debt. Keep chipping away at it and you'll be fine.

**inneedofhelp** · 01-27-2009, 12:40 PM

thank you.

I know I am better off than many people are having difficulty right now

I grew up really poor and that messed up my relationship with money.

I take full responsibility for spending over my budget and for charging stuff I probably---wait, I DID NOT, need.

I am just nervous right now cause I don't have family to fall back on and I always have this fear of being homeless in the back of my head.

I also am upset at my bank for pulling this bs....reducing my available credit has also made my score worse!

**creditcardfree** · 01-27-2009, 12:44 PM

I understand the need to feel security. If a credit card can't provide that, then you need to rely on yourself. Get a second job, save coins, collect cans, spend less, do online surveys, use coupons...anything you can think of to add some more cash to the emergency fund.

Keep your head up...you can do this!

**maat55** · 01-27-2009, 12:57 PM

If you are paying extra on your current debts you could go ahead and apply the extra to your EF. I did this while paying off debt, as well.

If you are only paying minimums, as creditcardfree suggests, find other ways to fund it. Personally, I don't agree with the mentality of using CC's for a backup. I would do anything to not carry a balance on a CC.(Short of robbery)

**anastasia-b** · 01-27-2009, 12:58 PM

That is awesome that you have turned your financial situation around. You should be really proud of yourself.

I absolutely second the suggestion to find secondary income. Is there stuff that you can sell? For example, books on half.com.

Say you do need to cut into your remaining credit and your interest rate goes up. I have never done this, but it is worth it to call them and negotiate a lower rate. If you have been consistently chipping away at the debt, the cc company I think would be more willing to give you a little wiggle room.

**Joan.of.the.Arch** · 01-27-2009, 01:12 PM

I don't have any advice. I think it is true that having family who could back you up, even if only in the gravest circumstances, is such an emotional advantage. I'm sorry you don't have that.

Maybe you have friends who would not let you go without a roof over your head? I do have that, thank goodness, and the first two I think of who would be there for me are the poorest ones, the ones who have been though the worst of it themselves. I met one of them in a homeless shelter.

That is really cool that you were able to graduate from college despite your beginnings. I do understand though how your depression, your homelessness, your debt, your history with a not-so-great job, and your changes in terms on the credit cards could all mix together to make you feel insecure and maybe even angry in the present. Um, well, maybe if you just keep reading here everyday, you will pick up some more techniques for saving and building security. These forums do tend to have a fairly optimistic yet down to earth outlook. That night help to buffer your fears a bit.

**inneedofhelp** · 01-27-2009, 01:37 PM

Originally posted by Joan.of.the.Arch View Post

I don't have any advice. I think it is true that having family who could back you up, even if only in the gravest circumstances, is such an emotional advantage. I'm sorry you don't have that.

Maybe you have friends who would not let you go without a roof over your head? I do have that, thank goodness, and the first two I think of who would be there for me are the poorest ones, the ones who have been though the worst of it themselves. I met one of them in a homeless shelter.

That is really cool that you were able to graduate from college despite your beginnings. I do understand though how your depression, your homelessness, your debt, your history with a not-so-great job, and your changes in terms on the credit cards could all mix together to make you feel insecure and maybe even angry in the present. Um, well, maybe if you just keep reading here everyday, you will pick up some more techniques for saving and building security. These forums do tend to have a fairly optimistic yet down to earth outlook. That night help to buffer your fears a bit.

Thank you for your advice.

I know that my past doesn't have to represent my future and I also know that if I stay the course, I will pay down all of my debt in under 3 years. Woo hoo!!

My job is very good, and I am on a super tight budget. I have cut everything I can cut (except cell phone---will have to cut that too, I think but only use it because I am not home alot) and have a food budget of $100-$150.

I worked two jobs, but unfortunately it caused me to gain more weight and now I feel like a total potato. I was going to take the time I used to spend working (24 extra hours per week) and apply that to getting back into shape. I just don't know physically if I can handle two jobs again.

I am ok with my current budget....it just doesn't have much wiggle room.

I am thankful and grateful to have friends that would let me lie on their couch if I ever needed a place to stay.

I know I shouldn't be so upset, I think I was just so shocked by the bank's action plus the fact that I didn't receive any notification and had to find out about it while on my lunch break.

**TBH** · 01-27-2009, 03:57 PM

Yeah, the insecurity is totally understandable. The good thing is, you will be in a much better place soon. In just a few months you'll have more savings, less debt, more space between your CC balances and your limits.

I agree that this forum is a great place to get support.

I look forward to hearing about your progress and it really sounds like you will succeed.

**wincrasher** · 01-27-2009, 04:13 PM

You need to concentrate on building your emergency fund.

Do it at the expense of paying off debt for awhile.

You can't break the cycle of debt and credit cards if you don't have an adequate cushion of savings to fall back on.

Of course, stop spending - don't try to fill an emotional void with shopping.

Once you build a reserve of 3 to 6 months of expenses in savings, then start working on your debt.

**mom-from-missouri** · 01-27-2009, 04:50 PM

Anything you can do for some expense cutters, like take in a room mate? Or get a second job that would allow you to get in shape at the same time-such as a page at a library or a job at a rec center where you would be on your feet part of the time??

**snafu** · 01-27-2009, 05:18 PM

Kudos to you for getting an education and having a great job. While I understand why you feel insecure, perhaps it would help to go for a brisk, 20 minute walk twice each day. It will help both your weight and self esteem giving good endomorphs.

Anytime I have a major problem to sort out I make it a point to go for a brisk paced walk at noon and before dinner. The fresh air, currently a freezing minus 7 C, somehow makes problem solving more focussed with the added benefit of being Free!

**inneedofhelp** · 01-28-2009, 07:46 AM

Thank you everyone for your advice.

I am feeling a bit better this morning. I don't like the uncomfortable feeling, but I know I need to relax a bit more. I know that a lot of this worry is due to what happened when I was younger and I know people (such as my bf), who do not have any savings or 401k, AND have more responsibilities and they aren't freaking out like I am. So I need to take it into perspective that 1) I have been through a lot worse and can get through this and 2) I am very blessed, 3) I made this mess myself and just have to deal with it and 4) there are always times of feasts and famine and 5) if I just focus and stay true to my budget and working on my health, I will be better off 3 years from now.

I am still itching to get a 2nd job even though my body has been aching a lot lately and people tell me I need to "take care of myself". My bf thinks that rather than work, I should focus on myself and making time for me, and not being afraid to ask people for help.

**creditcardfree** · 01-28-2009, 07:52 AM

Losing weight and working out will reduce your stress levels and help combat some of that fear.

Remember, the credit card companies did not do anything to you as a personal attack...it is just business. And business for them is tough right now.

I think you will really be okay. You have a plan, stick to it and take care of yourself, too.

**inneedofhelp** · 01-28-2009, 08:02 AM

I know that they did not do this to me personally, I just feel that it is still wrong that they would do this and on top of it the loan that I had was a fixed monthly payment and a 19% interest rate. They are making a lot of money off of me and I just find their practices, while legal, to be less than appealing.

So upset I could cry :(