I So Agree With This

[disneysteve]

I just don't think that there is any merit in working some menial job for ~minimum wage when my child could be doing any number of other useful things like learning a language, playing a sport, practicing an instrument, taking an art class, taking a scuba class, leaning to code, whatever.

I may be contradicting myself, but I agree with you here. Work just for the sake of working isn't necessarily a good thing. Certainly, some kids have to work to afford college. No work means no money for tuition, so you do what you have to do and I absolutely respect that. But I didn't work during high school or college (except for summer camp jobs that I absolutely loved doing). I don't think I turned out too bad. I've got a good work ethic, I'm very financially responsible and very appreciative of what I have in life. Nobody would ever refer to me as a spoiled brat. Of course, I did finish school with $102,000 in debt which I repaid every penny of 12 years ahead of the repayment schedule. Working in school could have lessened that debt load, but I think it also would have significantly changed the college/med school experience for me.

[Scanner]

What's the old saying?

Idle time is the Devil's work?

Sure. . .if my child said, "Dad, I want to take July and August off so I can dedicate my time to learn Italian for a potential job offer when I graduate next year", I could buy that. Sure, skip the summer job lifeguarding and I'll foot more of the college bill. I think I am trying to be flexible here.

But how many kids approach their parents with these kind of lofty goals of self-development and improvement?

Kids are kids.

Most of them do not know what they want to be when they grow up at 20 years old.

So. . .most of them are going to spend July and August hanging out with their chuckleheaded friends from the 'hood if they don't have a job.

Hey, I had chuckleheaded friends and all but still . . .that ain't happening.

There's more to be gained from working and earning money and gathering life experience.

I don't know. . .this could certainly be a father - mother disagreement we are having. Moms tend to be more liberal with their kids, especially their sons for some reason.

It seems as a society we are crying out for fathering and yet, resistant to it at the same time.

[SavedintheCity]

What's the old saying?

Idle time is the Devil's work?

Sure. . .if my child said, "Dad, I want to take July and August off so I can dedicate my time to learn Italian for a potential job offer when I graduate next year", I could buy that. Sure, skip the summer job lifeguarding and I'll foot more of the college bill. I think I am trying to be flexible here.

There's more to be gained from working and earning money and gathering life experience.

I don't know. . .this could certainly be a father - mother disagreement we are having. Moms tend to be more liberal with their kids, especially their sons for some reason.

It seems as a society we are crying out for fathering and yet, resistant to it at the same time.

Sorry we share a Y chromosome. I am not a mother (nor yet a father). Maybe my opinion will change when I have my own child. But I still disagree. Children should be idle. That is why they are children.

It seems that your perspective is a little skewed. While you will force your child to work you will not force them to do over activities? Instead of allowing them to learn a language, play a sport, learn an instrument, why not demand that they do one of the list? I know, you can lead a horse to water, but you can't force a teenager to do a damn thing if they think you want them to do it.

To my french canadian friend, I said it was an American mentality, not particularly a protestant characteristic. It was an OP that introduced that line of reasoning.

[thekid]

LOL. Two not yet parents (haven't gotten around to getting one of those myself) debating what we will encourage our teens / college kids to do in maybe 16-20 years

I agree that if the kid of the future is keenly into other activities and generally a motivated future lad, I will not insist on future him/her absolutely working part time. The point is to try your outmost that they become well rounded, happy and productive (not to insist on the means to get there).

Both my gf and I had parents who paid for most/all of our education (save for my foreign grad school as that became just plainly too expensive and I could carry my own). My gf was actually from a wealthy family and had school, cars, vacations all paid for. Nonetheless, we both worked quite a bit part time during school / full time in summer. For my part, I did it to gain a bit of financial independence and, well, just because that is the way I am (my parents had to veto the job as a bike delivery boy for a local convenience store I came home with when I was 13 because they felt I was just too young). I did however gain a wealth of life experience from the varied part-time jobs that I did during the years and that, in retrospect, has been quite a useful and a valid experience. Not in the least approaching anything that may be considered “suffering”. I had my little job (often jobs) that gave me pride and my own money which also gave me pride and a sense of achievement.

I personally feel that part-time work is a great educational tool. It is not end all be all, just a valid growing up experience which I would strongly encourage.

As for the idle children thing, well it depends what age you are talking about. I do not feel it is normal for a 17-18 yr old and over to be idle, doing nothing but attending school. I would feel they need to get moving and gaining responsibility.

As for tuition, if cost is an issue (as it most likely is in the US with the high costs), I completely fail to see why the young adult college student cannot work part-time to help foot the bill. That is beyond me.