Feeling Overwhelmed Need Advice

[horselover12]

Hi,

I have been down the same path many times with my finances. I am trying to get back on track once again but always get frustrated as to how to start when I am behind on all my bills and don't have the money to pay even rent this month until I get paid next week.

Please don't bash me as I suffer with severe depression and PTSD and it seems that I spend money instead of saving for a rainy day.

I know how to do a budget but I just don't know where to start when I have no money to put towards everything at the moment. Do I just need to do a budget everytime I get paid or sell something? That way I am figuring out what I need to spend it on instead of just spending on whatever?

Also I am lost as to what to do to pay my bills on time again. I was doing great until November when I had a bout of depression.

Please let me know suggestions.

Thank you

[rennigade]

Why not list out how much you make and what your expenses are? We need more info to assist better.

Yes...it also helps to make a budget and to know how much comes in and how much goes out.

[horselover12]

Ok here goes

Income per month:
Work $1,600
Child Support: $474
Selling stuff on Ebay: $100-$200


Monthly Expenses:

Rent: $819
Internet: $55
Electricity: $75-$100
Car Payment: $270
Mobile Phones: $100
Insurance: $95
Storage unit: $109 (going through and getting rid of my mother's estate things that were left to me)

I do try and tithe my church 10%
I have the usual expenses such as gas, car repairs, groceries, doctor bills

Most months I get the child support but some months he does not send it.

[Nutria]

Ok here goes

Income per month:
Work $1,600
Child Support: $474
Selling stuff on Ebay: $100-$200

Before or after tax?

Monthly Expenses:

Rent: $819
Internet: $55
Electricity: $75-$100
Car Payment: $270
Mobile Phones: $100
Insurance: $95
Storage unit: $109 (going through and getting rid of my mother's estate things that were left to me)

Which adds up to $1,548.

I do try and tithe my church 10%
I have the usual expenses such as gas, car repairs, groceries, doctor bills

You must add those as monthly expenses

Most months I get the child support but some months he does not send it.

How "most" is "most"?

Please don't bash me as I suffer with severe depression and PTSD

Few of us have been perfect savers our whole adult lives (or even a small fraction), so we won't bash you for that.

Unfortunately, your creditors don't care whether or not you have severe depression and PTSD.

[rennigade]

Tithing needs to stop. Storage unit needs to go. Sort through the stuff you can keep/have room for...sell the rest or donate it. How much is the storage stuff even worth? $109/month adds up quick!

[cypher1]

Don't forget groceries/eating out expense. As for car payment, how much is left to pay off? That's another big piece to trim eventually.

I wouldn't include or count child support as income if it's not paid consistently each month.

[StormRichards]

Mobile Phones: $100

How many phones do you have? Ages of kids? Do they really need a phone?

[Nutria]

I wouldn't include or count child support as income if it's not paid consistently each month.

Put it in a separate savings account and then feed a fraction back into your checking account each month.

[Nutria]

How many phones do you have? Ages of kids? Do they really need a phone?

She might be on a contract.

[horselover12]

Hey everyone thanks for the replies.

Child support is usually good except in Jan and Feb. He works landscape work and can't work if its ice or snow on the ground.

Storage unit has quite a bit of stuff I am sorting through thats worth alot of money. Its just overwhelming sorting out things that were my mom's without having a bout of depression.

As far as cell phone its me and my 15 year old daughter. I work 45 mintues from her school and 30 mins from home. So I try to at least have that for her so I can keep up with her.

As far as other expenses goes I won't quit tithing just will maybe cut back to 5%. My boyfriend keeps us pretty well supplied with food. I just try to make due with what I have left over.

Its tough when you are a single mom and one income. I have thought about a part time job but don't want to leave my daughter home by herself all the time.

[Nutria]

Storage unit has quite a bit of stuff I am sorting through thats worth alot of money. Its just overwhelming sorting out things that were my mom's without having a bout of depression.

Unfortunately, since the beginning of time, when you're poor you've got to suck it up and -- depression or not -- keep plodding along.

I work ... 30 mins from home. ... I have thought about a part time job

Do you mean another job?

but don't want to leave my daughter home by herself all the time.

We do understand. But when in financial difficulties sacrifices must be made.

[snafu]

Welcome to SA Horselover. I hope we can help. Getting on track and sticking to the numbers long term is down right hard. Any alternatives are even worse. I need you to tell daughter's dad that cold weather spells happen every year and he needs to set aside $ 75. every month to cover bad weather, lean income months. Your rent, electric, internet, phone, car payment, insurance all needs to be paid whatever the problems with weather.

I'm happy that BF helps with the food costs. I don't know if you plan meals but I've learned over time, if I'm careful, I can make good meals that every one will eat and enjoy and reduce spending at the grocery enough to have cold, hard, cash savings.

You list part of your income as e-bay/on-line sales but since there is a $ 109. storage fee, your sales need to exceed your costs or you are walking backwards with money leaving. What action can you take to bump up sales?

The reality is your car payments and insurance together are $ 365. That's a huge chunk of your income. How much are you spending on gas, operation and maintenance like oil change and tune-up? I don't drive much but easily spend $ 90. each month gas, parking, car wash and I must set aside $ 10. in an envelop, every two weeks for upcoming oil change. If I take care of my car it will continue to perform for me.

How much do you still owe on the car? What is the interest rate? Of each $ 270. payment, how many dollars go to interest...how many dollars go to reduce the amount of the loan?

What is the time frame of your phone contract? I suggest looking on internet and asking friends and people you work with if they get a good deal on their phone server so that you are prepared t make a change when the contract ends.

All this sounds like tiny snips but the grow over time if you are strong and stick to your plan. I use You Tube ideas [called Hacks] to get me through problems. I have confidence you can overcome the challenges life throws to develop a stronger you. Way at the bottom f the SA page, there are ideas to help save monet.

I wonder if there is any way to increase your income. Can you offer child care in your home evening hours when home with daughter?

[GoodSteward]

First thing I want to remind you of is that nobody has done this perfect, and you are not superwoman, nor should you expect yourself to be. Step by step you can move into a better financial position, but don't assume you should be able to do a 180 overnight. Maybe mentally, but not financially. Moving in the right direction will eliminate a lot of stress once you feel you have a handle on things, but don't get bogged down in time frames. We want to start off with the right expectations so we don't get bogged down trying to do too much at once and get discouraged.

Tithes have been discussed here before, and I want to reiterate to everybody that it is a religious observance are deeply personal and we don't push against those. They are handled differently than other obligations, and regardless of how others feel, you should do what you feel you need to. Otherwise, you will feel even worse. We are not here to discuss religious observances.

When we suffer from emotional things, a lot of our choices are based on finding relief. We find outlets by spending, and having extras in life. That needs to be curbed but in baby steps. My wife has struggled with depression, so I know how things can set it off. If you've never suffered with depression, you don't realize it isn't a "just pick yourself up" situation.

You don't have an excessive amount of expenses, but living on a written budget will help you see where the extra is going. I don't believe any good would come from you ditching cell phones, no longer paying tithes, or other extreme(extreme to you) choices. Changes must be made, but we need to make them where it will help more than potentially hurt. Others may not agree with me(wouldn't be the first), but it sounds to me like what you are looking for most is the encouragement that you can do this, and I believe you can. You came here looking for help, which shows you want to do better.

I think the first goal is to simply get on a budget(do the best you can, nobody gets it right first time), and do your best to save up 1000$ emergency fund, or possibly just 500$. You need a quick win to really reinforce a new direction and having almost anything saved up feels like a major win when you don't have much. I recommend starting a savings account online using a different bank. I'm not a fan of using the same bank as your checking due to how easy it is to just pull it back out with a simple transfer within the bank app. A second job might help, but only if it was short term. Doubling down on jobs is extremely stressful and needs to have some serious financial gain to be worth it. What do you feel is the first thing you need to do?

[Nutria]

You don't have an excessive amount of expenses, but living on a written budget will help you see where the extra is going.

First, list all your expenses for a month. Paying with a DC (debit card), and when at Walmart putting groceries and "other stuff" on separate receipts is an easy way to do this.

Then download your month's checkbook and CC activity from the banks' websites. That's how I figured out where our money was going.

I don't believe any good would come from you ditching cell phones, no longer paying tithes, or other extreme(extreme to you) choices. Changes must be made, but we need to make them where it will help more than potentially hurt.

OP might benefit from Dave Ramsey.

[feh]

As far as cell phone its me and my 15 year old daughter. I work 45 mintues from her school and 30 mins from home. So I try to at least have that for her so I can keep up with her.

Find a cheaper plan. With some investigation, you shouldn't spend more than $10/line for mobile phone these days.