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Paying for a wedding is frivolous. As as far as I see it you can just go down the to town hall and marry so there's no need to go crazy. The wedding should be a celebration just a big party where your family comes and enjoys themselves and shares in the happiness of the new couple. Not the start to a crippling cycle of debt or the biggest debated or regretted chunk of money spent in a lifetime.
People are way overboard with weddings. I think that when kids get handed money for the wedding they go hog wild. I know a girl whose parents financed her wedding for 20K they had all sorts of fancy things going on. The girl was married for 4 years total but the parents will be paying for that wedding for far longer. And I see others who stay together but are paying off the wedding years after bitter about other things they can't afford. I've read about others who spend tons of money on the guests food and then flip out when someone doesn't give a gift that equals up to a certain amt of money they were expecting back that kind of entitlement is crazy. Weddings are not an investment, they are supposed to be just another big party. No one is supposed to be sitting there keeping score and taking inventories of who got what.
Unless there is some cultural standard or some time honored tradition that should continue (like disneysteve mentioned those big weddings), it's probably better just for the parent speak to the child when he or she decides to get married and so the parent can figure out what it is the couple wants to do. To let the couple fret about how they are going to pay. To let the couple come up with a reasonable plan they can afford and then and only then the parents could step in and throw in a few extras or stuff they really want that is not in the budget but is reasonable (like a bit more food for everyone or flowers for myself and the bridesmaids in our case.) And also possibly to talk some sense into them if the couple if they are going overboard...
People are way overboard with weddings. I think that when kids get handed money for the wedding they go hog wild. I know a girl whose parents financed her wedding for 20K they had all sorts of fancy things going on. The girl was married for 4 years total but the parents will be paying for that wedding for far longer. And I see others who stay together but are paying off the wedding years after bitter about other things they can't afford. I've read about others who spend tons of money on the guests food and then flip out when someone doesn't give a gift that equals up to a certain amt of money they were expecting back that kind of entitlement is crazy. Weddings are not an investment, they are supposed to be just another big party. No one is supposed to be sitting there keeping score and taking inventories of who got what.
Unless there is some cultural standard or some time honored tradition that should continue (like disneysteve mentioned those big weddings), it's probably better just for the parent speak to the child when he or she decides to get married and so the parent can figure out what it is the couple wants to do. To let the couple fret about how they are going to pay. To let the couple come up with a reasonable plan they can afford and then and only then the parents could step in and throw in a few extras or stuff they really want that is not in the budget but is reasonable (like a bit more food for everyone or flowers for myself and the bridesmaids in our case.) And also possibly to talk some sense into them if the couple if they are going overboard...
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