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So, I met this gal "Mary". Mary is single, and has a 15 year old son. She never married the boys father, (he also has never married). Mary's friends from work are pushing her to get child support regulated through the court and she asked my opinion. I told her I wouldn't, based on her story. Here is her story.
Mary got preg in high school. The parents on both sides were very unhappy and there was a lot of finger pointing, one reason they never married. But, the father does and always has paid for the following: 1/2 of daycare, he pays the school directly for the boys lunches. He takes the boy every weekend, and buys him clothes and shoes. She told me she has not had to buy the boy any clothing in years--the dad does it. Dad also pays for summer camps, yearbooks and bought the boys letter jacket and just ordered his class ring for him. He also sends food to her house--such as fruit baskets or meat from Omaha steak co. Last winter he paid for the propane to heat her house. He takes the boy on vacation and business trips if school is out. Twice he has also taken her on a business trip and paid for her hotel room as well--he had meetings during the day but didn't want to leave the boy alone-by the way this was in Hawaii. He has also provided medical, dental, and vision insurance for the boy the last 12 years. He has a college fund for the boy with all 3 names on the account. He comes to the boys football and basket ball games, and is in regular contact with the teachers at school. He also bought his band instrument for him. He also every few months gives her gift cards for Walmart incase the boy "needs" something. She usually uses it for gasoline or her household shopping.
He is working with the boy giving him driving lessons and has asked Mary if she wants him to have a car at age 16 or to wait--and if so, what type of car would she want the boy to have. So, she is under the impression he will most likely provide the car and its insurance. Dad makes 6 figures, she makes around $49,000, but is not lacking for anything because of the boys dad.
I say leave it as it is--why rock the boat now. Besides, the court could order him to pay much less than what she is getting now.
Any legal advantages to going through the court? Oh-by the way, the boys college fund has over 20 grand in it.
Mary got preg in high school. The parents on both sides were very unhappy and there was a lot of finger pointing, one reason they never married. But, the father does and always has paid for the following: 1/2 of daycare, he pays the school directly for the boys lunches. He takes the boy every weekend, and buys him clothes and shoes. She told me she has not had to buy the boy any clothing in years--the dad does it. Dad also pays for summer camps, yearbooks and bought the boys letter jacket and just ordered his class ring for him. He also sends food to her house--such as fruit baskets or meat from Omaha steak co. Last winter he paid for the propane to heat her house. He takes the boy on vacation and business trips if school is out. Twice he has also taken her on a business trip and paid for her hotel room as well--he had meetings during the day but didn't want to leave the boy alone-by the way this was in Hawaii. He has also provided medical, dental, and vision insurance for the boy the last 12 years. He has a college fund for the boy with all 3 names on the account. He comes to the boys football and basket ball games, and is in regular contact with the teachers at school. He also bought his band instrument for him. He also every few months gives her gift cards for Walmart incase the boy "needs" something. She usually uses it for gasoline or her household shopping.
He is working with the boy giving him driving lessons and has asked Mary if she wants him to have a car at age 16 or to wait--and if so, what type of car would she want the boy to have. So, she is under the impression he will most likely provide the car and its insurance. Dad makes 6 figures, she makes around $49,000, but is not lacking for anything because of the boys dad.
I say leave it as it is--why rock the boat now. Besides, the court could order him to pay much less than what she is getting now.
Any legal advantages to going through the court? Oh-by the way, the boys college fund has over 20 grand in it.
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