Let me rephrase the question....

**Lori63** · 08-16-2005, 04:54 AM

Re: Let me rephrase the question....

gas-anyway to cut something out or carpool? I know gas prices are killing us.

**cicy33** · 08-16-2005, 04:59 AM

Re: Let me rephrase the question....

I added up your bills and they come to: $1820. and for about 7 months you don't even make that much so I am going to assume that you cut back on the grocery bill and stuff during that time. The biggest area that I can see is your electric. I am not going to say the internet/cable/phone cuz for us that helps to spend less on other stuff. Are you applying for student grants? the ones you don't have to pay back? How many kids live with you? gas for vehicles also seems high. Do you do a lot of driving? Of course with the new prices one doesn't have to go far! lol Otherwise you seem to be doing what you can.

**2moretrees** · 08-16-2005, 05:00 AM

Re: Let me rephrase the question....

I guess a lot of it depends on how strongly you feel about cutting the expenses. It's all a matter of choices and convenience.

You really don't need cable or TV in general for that matter.

Entertainment doesn't have to cost a dime - walks with the family arouond the neighborhood are free

**becomingafinacialgrownup** · 08-16-2005, 05:20 AM

Re: Let me rephrase the question....

Yes I get grants with which we purchase meat for the year and also pay yearly expenses. We also use tax refunds for these if needed.

I drive an hour and 15 minutes away for school. DH drives 30 minutes. As for the electric we live in an old house and have been working on adding things to help with weatherization.

Yes walks are free and we have a beautiful area to walk in,however,doesn't always work out that way due to school activities(mine and the kids and husband since he works in a school),work etc. most months we don't use it but save it. but once in awhile it is nice to do something fun with the kids.
Of our 5 children,2 are with us full time and three are here every other weekend,1 week at christmas,1 week at spring break,4 weeks in the summer.

p.s. hubby also grows a small garden and help with a friends much larger garden(he sells at farmers market) for our veggies.

**pennywise** · 08-16-2005, 05:48 AM

Re: Let me rephrase the question....

What I see is the tithe and entertainment could be cut out. The approach I have taken is to use your income 550 and 360 since 360 can be counted on and DH at 600 for an income of 1510/month reliable. Your outgo without the tithe and entertainment is 1520. You are 10 short. In the higher income times you save the extra for the low income times as Ben Franklin said "the morning sun does not last all day". God does not want you to give so you hurt and any preacher telling you to do so is someone to walk away from. Tithe with time not money or pull into your home and have a personal relationship with God. Be aware a church pays no taxes, the minister's housing is completely free, even if he buys it on his own there is a special tax for him to write off the entire cost of housing (can you do this). Search your heart and soul and let God tell you if he will punish you or is the minister telling you he will punish you. Tithing does not come only in the form of money. Figure your hourly earnings and divide by 200/mo and give that many hours of labor to your church. Entertainment, bah - walks, reading books, etc. It is all about sacrifices. What sacrifices will you make? the electric is still way to high and you need to evaluate your home and usage. Give us a list of everything that is plugged in room by room please. We can make up the difference in the 10 dollars with the electric.

**jmjj215** · 08-16-2005, 06:04 AM

Re: Let me rephrase the question....

the minister's housing is completely free, even if he buys it on his own there is a special tax for him to write off the entire cost of housing

If he buys it himself but gets the special tax write off, it's not free - it's deductible.

**pennywise** · 08-16-2005, 06:10 AM

Re: Let me rephrase the question....

Okay, but why does he get a special deduction when others do not. No one is better or different. I have to work extra hours to pay the taxes that he is not. Doesn't anyone understand how it works: it is all a pyramid scheme: learn it and you will have money: Campbells soup gives education labels to your school worth say 10 cents, do you really think the Campbells pay that, no they marked up the soup 10 cents and you pay it but they get the tax write off. Who should get the write off the soup company or me who paid it. When a college employee gets free tuition for him/herself and family where is that money coming from: those who pay. Nothing is free, it is all robbing (stealing) from someone else for yourself, period. Stealing is stealing no matter what rule or law you make up to justify it. Stealing is stealing and one of the 10 commandments. Justifying it is just as wrong in God's eyes and mine. I will work to pay for mine and I suggest you do the same. If you accept a benefit that steals from another house, you ARE guilty of stealing.

**becomingafinacialgrownup** · 08-16-2005, 06:16 AM

Re: Let me rephrase the question....

just to clarify, my pastor is not telling me how much to tithe. that is loosely 10% of our gross.

Also, I am looking for ways to grow/invest the savings we do have.

As I said we are starting to weatherize the house, and things are turned off when not in use.I really don't know how else we could cut back there.

**robex** · 08-16-2005, 06:35 AM

Re: Let me rephrase the question....

I agree that you could cut out the amount you tithe and volunteer time instead. You will be able to tithe again when you have the extra money.
My mom is a minister and although she does not pay for her housing, her congregation does...this is because her income is fairly low and, generally, ministers are moved around every five or ten years. The church has owned the house for years so it's paid off and only property tax is paid by the congregation. In past, if the church did not have a house, she received a housing allowance that would be the equivalent of what a house would cost to rent in the vicinity of the church.
Anyways, yes, I would cut the tithe and the cable...

**becomingafinacialgrownup** · 08-16-2005, 07:06 AM

Re: Let me rephrase the question....

I wanted to show you mine and my husband's current schedules. I can reduce tithe but not add volunteer hours

ME

Monday-babysit twins 7 a.m.-3:30 pm,campground 4-12
Tues- in class leave house at 6:30-get home around 6 in evening
Wed-baby-sit twins 7-3:30,campground 4-12
Thurs- see tues
Friday-see weds
Saturday- campground 2:45-10:45pm
Sunday- Am Church-pm campground

DH

Monday- Friday leave for work at 6:30 am home about 3:30
Weds. eve-Church 7(hubby works with the youth)
Every other Friday-leave from work to drive 3 hours each way to pick up his children from their mothers

Sprinkled throughout the mix are my two children who live with us full time and their various activities.

In our "free time" the house and lawn work gets done. Meals prepared etc.

**pennywise** · 08-16-2005, 07:14 AM

Re: Let me rephrase the question....

Honey, this is fine. You are busy I see. Your priorities are correct. I still would cut the tithe, not donate time since you have neither. I think God will love you anyhow. Go to church if you feel you must, or have a personal relationship with God at home. It is in your families best financial interest to cut the tithe. Do not feel guilty about meeting your needs over those of the church.

**becomingafinacialgrownup** · 08-16-2005, 07:21 AM

Re: Let me rephrase the question....

I know God loves me anyway. I go to church for me to uplift and enrich my knowledge as well as see my friends since I don't have any other. I have a wonderful caring church"family".

I hope you all don't think I am offended, I am just explaining things from my point of view

**pennywise** · 08-16-2005, 07:28 AM

Re: Let me rephrase the question....

No offenses taken, just trying to help you solve the dilemma and hoping to help you not feel guilty about some decisions you may have to make. I stopped going to church because of the money. As a child, every Sunday, more money needed, more money needed. Not God loves you. The money in the basket is money I need to cover any possible disability or my retirement. When my spouse lost his job, there WAS NOONE to help me with the mortgage. Or how about when my mental illness exacerbated (means worsens) because I was so afraid we would loose our house and everyone just judged me, don't want to talk to me, can't accept me because I am mentally ill (very functional though, wouldn't you say). So I say, every man for himself. People do not love each other, they judge, criticize, ridicule - and especially the faithful churchgoers. (don't want to offend, all are not the same, this is my experience). So you think of yourself, cut the tithe, and take care of your family. Where are these church people you give $200 to every month when you need help with the children?

**becomingafinacialgrownup** · 08-16-2005, 07:41 AM

Re: Let me rephrase the question....

I am very sorry you for the experience you have gone through. No church should behave that way.

I am very fortunate to have not had that experience. As a matter of fact, when we were going through some very hard times our church has helped us through the benevolent fund with food rent and electricity. Thankfully we have not had to ask for help in several years.
Many of theses churchgoers are busy with thier own families of 4 or 5 and yet some do help with my children at times. We have several Dr.s and pharmacists in our church and they have taken my children on several occasions.
Again, I am sorry for your experience and I hope that you will someday experience what a true church family should be to one another.

Let me rephrase the question....