Secret Bank Accounts: When money is tight, can you afford to be honest with your love

[disneysteve]

Sometimes I don't even think my husband remembers how much I earn.

I guarantee you my wife could not tell you how much I earn. It is simply a non-issue, something she sees no reason to know or remember.

[quote[I really have never understood the idea of the joint account, 'his' account, 'her' account. I realize some people use this so that each partner can have some of their own 'fun' money to blow on whatever they want. However, if it was something frivolous I'd still be mad about it whether it was part of 'our' money or just part of 'his' money.[/QUOTE]

Same here. There just is no such thing as "her" money or "my" money. Anything either one of us spends affects the ultimate bottom line, no matter what account that money gets pulled from. That's why we see no reason to separate it. Just keep it all together and keep things simple.

[kebark]

Secret Credit cards are a bastard to people working in collections =/

[wnlbutterfly]

To Boosami: "why a secret", because he is a spender and would find a reason to "need" to use the money. His main thing, which is very odd, is tune ups on the cars. Not a bad thing, but not as often as he seems to think they need it when he feels we have money. He isn't a mechanic, doesn't know a thing about cars and I think this is his way of trying to take care of the cars. I don't know.

Anyway....we now have a second EF that he does know about and I got an email saying two cars have appointments this weekend (usually oil changes). EF won't be touched, as that isn't an emergency.

The fact we haven't kept a savings account in 25 yrs is a big eye opener wouldn't you think? We would start it, then something come up and I would give up. Perhaps our definitions of emergencies were different then.

Once I feel like I have a good handle on things, I will share that info...but right now it could all fall apart still, we are just on the edge of this and hoping to gain momentum.