gofundme donations

[msomnipotent]

I only give money to proven charities. I give people the things they need instead of money, like when someone's house burns down. In 40 years, I only knew one person that lost their home in a fire, and then 4 different families lost everything in fires in the past 2 years or so. They asked for specific items, not money. Although I did give a CVS gift card to one so their teens could pick out what personal items they wanted.

[disneysteve]

I broke my own "I'd rather give directly" rule recently and gave to a former co-worker who's life turned in to a total mess. Yes, there were elements he brought on himself, and he was no saint, but he is facing chronic life-ending illness with no one he could turn to for help other than one young family member who wasn't in a position to offer much help to him. He set up the GoFundMe account for himself, and I decided to give a small amount out of compassion and probably a sense of not wanting to look bad in front of other co-workers. I chose to give via GFM because I preferred to keep my donation somewhat at arm's length rather than risk getting myself tangled up in his mess. I know that probably sounds really awful of me.

That makes sense and doesn't sound awful at all. It's important not to let yourself get sucked into other people's drama. GFM lets you help anonymously, which can be important for a number of reasons. Helping directly can be difficult if it means the person will know what you did.

[rob62521]

Like many of you, I do not do the gofundme thing because I would rather send money directly to the person if that is what I think is best.

I concur with Kork -- so many have become online pandhandling. A friend created one for her daughter and keeps sending many of the link to it. There isn't anything drastically needed for this daughter and I don't want to be guilted into giving money.

[kork13]

This thread reminds me, just a couple weeks ago, my wife wanted to send some money for a cousin who is fighting through breast cancer right now. She has a gofundme in place, but based on other conversations we've had in the past, she decided to just send her some cash along with our family's Christmas card. And I'm happy to do it! My wife was initially going to send around $60, but I told her that I was just fine with sending as much as $100, so that's what we ended up sending. Forget gofundme... What a guilt-laden scam.

[disneysteve]

Forget gofundme... What a guilt-laden scam.

I think it's a bit harsh to call it a scam when used properly, though it certainly rises to that level in some cases. My biggest issue with it is the cut that GFM takes out of the money. That's the main reason I'd rather give directly.

What really surprises me is how many people are willing to donate to complete strangers they know nothing about except what they read on the GFM listing. I would never donate that way. On the few occasions that I have donated through GFM, it was to help someone I knew personally and that was just the cleanest way to do it.

[kork13]

I think it's a bit harsh to call it a scam .... What really surprises me is how many people are willing to donate to complete strangers they know nothing about except what they read on the GFM listing.

Yes, definitely harsh... But I've seen way too many of these GFM things (dozens, which is saying alot, because I rarely use social media, etc.) that were either legitimately fraudulent (I can immediately think of 4 offhand), or most often, were absolutely meaningless, selfish, greedy, or abused (esp. keeping it going after meeting the 'desired' amount, or even worse, adjusting the target upward when it's realized that strangers are throwing money at you. And then when folks start blasting social media, or pestering for you with constant reminders/comments to contribute to their GFM because of whatever idiot reason they feel they deserve other people's money? Ugh...

Nope. Not one red cent. Not ever. I'll help people in legitimate need, do so generously, and directly. But I can't stomach pitiful beggary out of convenience/laziness.

[disneysteve]

Yes, definitely harsh... But I've seen way too many of these GFM things (dozens, which is saying alot, because I rarely use social media, etc.) that were either legitimately fraudulent (I can immediately think of 4 offhand), or most often, were absolutely meaningless, selfish, greedy, or abused (esp. keeping it going after meeting the 'desired' amount, or even worse, adjusting the target upward when it's realized that strangers are throwing money at you. And then when folks start blasting social media, or pestering for you with constant reminders/comments to contribute to their GFM because of whatever idiot reason they feel they deserve other people's money? Ugh...

Nope. Not one red cent. Not ever. I'll help people in legitimate need, do so generously, and directly. But I can't stomach pitiful beggary out of convenience/laziness.

I agree with all of that. I think many people have come to abuse GFM just to see what they can get. I'm not quite sure how GFM could do anything about that, though. Just as their are lots of scammers on ebay, I don't blame ebay for that. It isn't the fault of the platform. There are just a lot of sleazy people out there. Charity scams have been around for decades. Years ago it used to be those collection cans by the register at your local restaurant with some pitiful picture of a sick kid. I would never put money in those because I knew darn well that probably half the time or more, that money was ending up in someone's pocket.

[Thrif-t]

This thread got me thinking, about 25 years ago we used to get letters from a distant family member asking if we'd help fund his mission trip. I guess now a days kids don't even have to write those begging letters anymore cause they can just set up their go fund me account.

[Gailete]

I don't use it. If I see a need, I do try to help. I well remember one Sunday at church the teacher mentioning that a lady that came to the church with several children was broke with no food (her husband wasn't paying what he was supposed to). So the teacher proposed everyone bring a canned good for her the next Sunday. My mind couldn't even process that. She and her kids have no food now and you want her to wait a week to get some canned goods. I went home pulled what I could out of my surplus and went to the store and got milk, meat, etc. and dropped it off at her house. Not saying that to brag, but if a need is bad enough, do what you can then. Interestingly enough on the next Sunday, not a single lady had brought a canned good! And most of these were women in much better shape than I was financially to go buy groceries for someone. I have been blessed and haven't good hungry although my mom when we were young did run into total empty cupboard situations.