Online dating costs

**bjl584** · 11-08-2013, 08:29 AM

I've used a few of the free ones. There are countless free dating apps that you can download on a smartphone. OKC and Plenty of Fish are probably the two most common.

The only hidden costs, if you want to call them that, that I've noticed is that there are a lot of scammers out there. Be careful connecting with strangers. You never know who you might be talking to, what their motives are, and if the picture that is displayed on their profile is new, 10 years old, or even them at all.

**SaturnGreed** · 12-03-2013, 06:36 PM

yea, i use free ones as well. I see no point to paying when most people are at the free ones.

**edg126** · 12-04-2013, 06:41 AM

I used match.com for about 6 months then cancelled it, then signed up for chemistry.com and met my wife through it.

I did not feel like there were any hidden costs. I used it to supplement dating from people I'd meet through traditional means. At the time I had an active lifestyle and was out all the time (and spending money all the time). Any date I went out on even if I wasn't into them I still enjoyed myself so it wasn't a waste of money if you had a good time.

I think it could balance out. If I had met a girl at a bbq I'd be willing to spend more money on a date, and possibly give it a few date before deciding to continue or not. With online dating I'd do something a little cheaper and make the call after one date.

I could see it being expensive if people misrepresented themselves or not knowing what they are looking for. I started online dating when I was about 27 and by then had figured out what type of person or personality would not be a good fit for me. So I'd be picky on selecting the date.

**atomicrc11** · 12-04-2013, 11:04 AM

Or it could be $1.3 million dollars in extra costs:

http://www.thestar.com/news/investigations/2013/11/30/online_dating_relationship_ends_badly_13m_later.html

**jIM_Ohio** · 12-04-2013, 01:39 PM

Originally posted by jeffrey View Post

I'm putting together an article about the hidden costs of online dating -- those additional costs that come beyond the cost of the subscription fee to join the sites like Match and eHarmony and the actual date costs. I thinking about things like the costs of predating (going out to coffee) which you might do a lot more often than you would in traditional dating and the additional costs of travel since the dates may be in a wider variety of areas. Have any of you participated in these sites and did you notice any additional costs that come with online dating?

I have used one service, and the up front fee far outweighs the cost of the dates. If someone signs up for the service worried about the cost of the date, I don't want to date them anyway.

pm me or call me for details

edit, I also met my first wife through yahoo personals (which were free at the time) and I would not trust a free dating site based on that experience alone.

**FrugalTexan75** · 12-08-2013, 05:30 PM

I met my current bf through an online dating service (a paid one catering towards those of my faith.) Since he is in NE and I am in NM ... yep, there sure are a lot of extra costs. I'm very thankful for Skype because that allows us to talk face to face for as long as we want for only the cost of our Internet connection. However, to see each other once a month, it means the cost of driving 1100+ miles two ways or flying. That gets expensive fast - which is part of the reason why I'll be moving at the end of May. (So, moving costs could kind of be another hidden cost of online dating, esp. if you meet someone from another city/state/country.)

**Rogerthat11** · 12-09-2013, 12:36 PM

Originally posted by bjl584 View Post

I've used a few of the free ones. There are countless free dating apps that you can download on a smartphone. OKC and Plenty of Fish are probably the two most common.

The only hidden costs, if you want to call them that, that I've noticed is that there are a lot of scammers out there. Be careful connecting with strangers. You never know who you might be talking to, what their motives are, and if the picture that is displayed on their profile is new, 10 years old, or even them at all.

Meeting scammers and strangers are the biggest one. The free ones are the worst places to find people in terms of people who scam you.

**hamchan** · 12-09-2013, 05:25 PM

I never ran into scammers on OKC. Plenty of weirdos and one rapist, but no one tried to take my money at least. It probably helped that I wouldn't even consider people who were long distance from me.

**neatdesign** · 12-11-2013, 03:33 PM

Originally posted by hamchan View Post

Plenty of weirdos and one rapist, but no one tried to take my money at least.

If I had to choose, I'd definitely be more scared of meeting a rapist than a thief. YIKES.

Regarding hidden online dating costs: A lot of international couples meet through online dating services. Because of the distance they end up having to pay for expensive airfare, hotels, car rentals, not to mention visa application fees in some cases. And because of immigration hurdles, there are probably quite a few couples whose relationships accelerate towards marriage more quickly than under normal circumstances because otherwise they can't live together in the same country.

I was in this position 12 years ago when I met my British husband online; I'm American. We're now divorced, in large part because we rushed into marriage so we could be together when we were never truly compatible to begin with.

So in addition to all the regular costs of online dating, those couples then also end up with very unromantic immigration costs: visa application fees, official photos, photocopies of documentation, police certificate fees, travel costs to/from the consulate, etc. These range from a couple of hundred dollars to (usually) thousands. And that's not even taking into account all the time spent dealing with immigration; some people have to take unpaid days off to go to the consulate, etc.

Online dating costs