child support or alimony payments or recipients

[QuarterMillionMan]

Full disclosure, I don't have any child support payments nor alimony payments but I know friends who do and their lives seems miserable having to make payments, can't say about recipients. A couple of guys I know choose only to work "under the table" so as to avoid having to make their child support payments, dead-beat losers in my opinion. A few other guys I know have alimony payments for life. I don't know their specific details but they seem to be constantly broke and bitter about it. Do others care to share some stories whether from a payments perspective or recipients perspective. I've never married nor do I have kids so I have no personal experiences and grateful about not being in such a predicament.


edited: If you didn't have these payments would your financial position be far greater or doesn't much have an effect?

[Jerry91]

Child support or alimony payments can be a great burden if your own financial position is not secure. One may not be able to make both ends meet due to this burden. As you have never gone through this, you may not understand the seriousness of the situation for those who face this situation.

[NetSkyBlue]

Child support or alimony payments can be a great burden if your own financial position is not secure. One may not be able to make both ends meet due to this burden. As you have never gone through this, you may not understand the seriousness of the situation for those who face this situation.

Children can be a great burden if one's financial position is not secure. I hate to hear about men who try to slack off on paying child support. Would they just not care if they found out the child's mother was trying to slack off on paying for the child's food/clothing, etc?

Possibly not being able to make ends meet is really something one should consider before getting/getting someone pregnant.

[shaggy]

*Hand up*

I will be paying alimony to my ex-husband for the rest of his life or until he remarries.

Here are the factors that contributed to the alimony sitch:

* Long-term marriage: We were married for 28+ years (in my state, being married for more than 10 years means they won't put a limit on the length of alimony payments).

* Leverage: I started a successful business during my marriage, so that business was considered community property -- even though my ex had no part of the business. The existence of the business gave him significant leverage when it came to negotiating alimony payments.

* Lack of skills: My ex didn't work outside the home for the last 20 years of our marriage. Yes, you read that right. For 20 years he was a mediocre housekeeper. No, we don't have kids.

* Older ex: When we divorced, he was in his mid-50s and not likely to find gainful employment. So I'm going to be supporting him for the rest of his life.


I'm not happy about the situation, nor am I bitter. It is what it is.

I look at alimony as the invoice I'm paying to be free. On the plus side, I've capped my financial liability to my Ex at the amount of alimony; were we still married, I'd be liable for all of his debts and expenses.