Bucket List and Personal Finance?

[sandrark]

So, one of my best friends has been battling cancer for awhile. She had major surgery yesterday, and...things don't look good.

I t seems pretty clear that she's not going to beat it. Stats say the average survival for this type of cancer is ~ 14 months post-surgery.

She's 52, single, and has struggled financially her entire life.

I was thinking about the next year, and my desire to make it better for her. I asked my husband about helping her with a "bucket list" and paying for some (most?) of it.

Have you ever dealt with something similar? Any advice or caveats? Thoughts or reflections welcome...

Sandi

[cschin4]

I am not sure what a "bucket" list is but I am assuming it is all the things you wanted to do but did not.

It really depends on what one wants. I really want the point of my life to be that I did something good for others. So, in her case, I would probably be much more interested in volunteering at the soup kitchen and holding the hand of someone less fortunate than a trip to the Fiji Islands.

[cschin4]

But, really, I think it is just all about spending time together and being together. Playing cards, drinking tea, going to a movie or whatever. It is really the little things in life that are truly the big things. I can think of nothing greater to do than to lie in bed with my child and stroke their hair.

[hawkster]

A few Years ago I had a job that took most of my family time from me. I stepped down in order to have more family time and I am a richer man for it. There is such satisfaction for me in cooking for my girls,helping with homework,telling my daughter of boys intentions,and getting away at the beach for the week end. That's my list and I am living it.

You're friend is doing okay with her list if she has freinds like yourself that care like you do

[MonkeyMama]

Agreed with the others.

Though nowhere in the realm of cancer, my spouse just faced a life-threatening disease. Surprisingly, when you face death, you don't have a bucket list. You just want more time with your friends and family. That's it.

[wnlbutterfly]

Talk with her and see if there is something really special (event, celebration) or a place she would like to visit and go with her. Most likely she will want to spend time with friends and family. But I bet you might be able to talk her into a special outing with you.

My son was granted a Make-A-Wish, he didn't want any trips, nor didn't have any celebrity he wanted to met, he just wanted a big screen TV and some games that he could use to spend time with family.

My step-FIL with lung cancer also didn't want any trips, just time with family. Of course he had done a LOT of traveling during his lifetime and had seen pretty much everything he wanted.

Then there is my other FIL, on his death bed, didn't even want to make amends with his estranged son. The son was willing to put it all behind them and make the trip out of state. Never will figure that out.