Trying to rectify a bad choice - WWYD?

[AmbitiousSaver]

So before I sat down and did a budget... I signed the two girls up for 16 lessons of horseback riding for $500 on my Amex (I paid it off this month but the horseback riding charge never went through)

The girls have had 7 lessons so far and I received a call from the instructor today saying the reason the charge never went through is because they no longer take Amex (this is going to leave me with a credit on my Amex after I cancel the hotel reservations we made for Hawaii)

I've had buyers remorse over the horseback riding lessons and my 6 y/o still has to grow up some around the horses. She keeps forgetting her safety rules and has gotten stepped on by the pony & continuously walks behind the pony no matter how many times we tell her to be careful. My 7 y/o is taking to the riding more.

What I sort of want to do now... is just reduce the plan I bought and purchase 8 lessons (so my 7 y/o will only go once more) and then it'll just be $280. I can write a check and tell the girls next year when things look better financially we can go ahead and do it.

The other part of me wonders, because I signed a contract if I have to keep the 16 lessons. That and I hate pulling the girls out of something they love.

The instructor was wondering if I had a Visa/MC I could use... and really the only other thing I have is my debit card so I'll probably just write a check.

Would you just reduce the plan and be done with it? Or stick to the 16 lessons? I really shouldn't have signed them up since that money could go towards paying down our remaining credit card... but I also have guilt on the other hand cause its something they enjoy and have started to get the hang of.

[disneysteve]

I'm not sure the decision is up to you. I think you need to speak to the instructor and see if he is willing to let you out of the contract. If he is not, you are legally obligated to pay the agreed amount. If, however, he agrees to alter the terms, then do that.

[gamecock43]

I am a horse person. I started the riding at 6 yrs old and continued it through to riding on a NCAA team in college, trying to go pro after college and now riding on and off (when its either free for me to ride or I can line up with someone who will pay me..not realizing I love riding and will ride for free).
My mom told me that signing me up for lessons was her most expensive regret ever. She was joking-I hope.
I counter her statement by honestly saying that riding saved me from a life of drugs, teenage pregnancy and irresponcibility. (Thats the type of group I hung out with in middle school and high school) lucky for me I had to be at the barn after school, weekends, and also get a job to help pay for horse stuff. This limited the hanging out time with less than ideal influences. At the time I was always juggling time with boyfriends and parties with the riding and sadly horses got neglected sometimes.
But the riding introduced me to another group of friends who came from a bit more affluent families and had goals of college and careers.
Riding is addictive and its a lifestyle. If your daughter is showing an interest you have to figure out now if you can afford it. It will get more and more expensive as she gets older. The lessons will move from $35hr group lessons on an old pony to $50hr private lessons to leasing a horse for $600month to shows at $60 a day. And its kids in middle school who do this!
But the payoff is like no other sport. It teaches responcibility, humility and keeps the kid supervised for hours at a time. Most kids start spending 5-6 hrs a day in a barn easy.
And suprisingly, most kids dont get injured to much. Its the adults that wind up with broken legs for some reason.
So Im sure that at 6, 7yrs you are not thinking of life long committments and outside influences, but I'm just trying to explain that for a 7 yr old girl, this 'package lesson' deal (exactly how my mom got me in riding as well BTW) can get very very out of hand, and theres alot more to horses than just getting on and going around the ring.

[sounderella]

I'm with Steve on this one. It really all depends if the instructor will let you because if they won't....then it's really just a moot issue. If she will then yes...def go for the reduced plan.

[AmbitiousSaver]

Yeah I called her and asked if I could reduce the plan but that doesn't really look like that will pan out. So I told her I'll just write her a check for the $500 and give it to her Sunday.

Gamecock, I've heard similar things that horses do help keep kids out of trouble during the teen years. I don't think I've ever met a horse person who got into drugs or alcohol since to be around horses you need to be very aware and not take things that will alter your mind.

Eventually I do want them to get into horseback riding, but just not sure how to approach it now that they've started. My 7 y/o is REALLY taking well to it and has only gone 3 times and is already asking if she can get the horse to run. But again, its costly - even if I just stayed at the private lessons that is $1500/yr each girl so $3K a year... then my 4 y/o wants to get into it one day.

My hope though is maybe when they are older they can do a working student program to make it more affordable.

I really don't know if we can keep up this habit... come September I have to start paying my son's preschool tuition again, so that would be really hard to do both. And on the other hand I've thought of... my kids didn't get me into CC debt so why should I cut back on their extracurriculars for my mistake? For now I guess maybe just tell them that after this lesson package they need to take a break cause DH & I have to pay off a CC (and use that as an opportunity to teach them about CCs)... and then when things ease up next year and the CC is gone then they can start again.

[disneysteve]

my kids didn't get me into CC debt so why should I cut back on their extracurriculars for my mistake?

That is a dangerous way of thinking. Sure, the debt isn't the kids' fault, but you all need to work together to live below your means. I'm sure you want to teach your kids to be responsible with money. Letting them hear, "Mommy and daddy can't afford this right now" is an important part of that financial education. If you feel that you need to not deprive your kids of anything, you will have more difficulty getting your financial house in order.

[AmbitiousSaver]

That is a dangerous way of thinking. Sure, the debt isn't the kids' fault, but you all need to work together to live below your means. I'm sure you want to teach your kids to be responsible with money. Letting them hear, "Mommy and daddy can't afford this right now" is an important part of that financial education. If you feel that you need to not deprive your kids of anything, you will have more difficulty getting your financial house in order.

Good point. And yeah, I definitely want to teach them to be responsible with money so this can likely be a valuable opportunity to teach them that in order to do certain things, we need to make sure our financial situation is in order and teach them patience in the meantime.

[cschin4]

If you already paid or have to pay, then lesson learned. However, just because you started this and your kids like it doesn't mean you should continue. If you can't afford it, then don't break the bank trying to afford this. It is just going to get more and more expensive. I have friends that are financially strapped because they have their children in a high priced gymnastics program. Sorry, I just don't see the point. The kids have ALL their lives to learn and do all kinds of activities. Ruining your personal finances for them to do so is a big mistake. It is great if you can afford to enrich your child's world but there are many other ways to do that as well.