10 Weeks or 2nd job offer?

**tinapbeana** · 03-29-2007, 10:15 AM

focus on your child, no matter what. if that means you work less for pay in order to work more with him, so be it.

however, if you're not confident you have the necessary skill sets to get him through the process, a professional service such as sylvan learning center might be able to help, but i don't know how they work exactly.

at any rate, if you go this route (getting professional help in getting him through the grade) then the extra job would help offset that cost.

depends on your comfort level and honest appraisal of your ability to teach and coach a 14 (ish) year old boy for the next, what, 5-6 months?

**jIM_Ohio** · 03-29-2007, 10:16 AM

Originally posted by jwthornhill View Post

I finally met with my son's counselor and teachers yesterday regarding him graduating to the 9th grade or not.

I found out that currently his GPA is only 1.4 They told me that he only has the next 10 weeks to bring it up to at least 2.66 in order to qualify for summer school and then possibility of graduating after doing well in summer school. They told me that it was feasible but he would need lots of help.

Then at noon today, I was made an offer to begin working a 3-month contract installing and configuring a content management system (DotNetNuke) paying $55/hr. They told me that I would need to start immediately due to the urgency of the matter.

I really love my son and don't want him to fail a grade. ???

JW

Need to Be Debt Free

what is consequence if your son does not graduate?
what is consequence if you do not work?

**Scanner** · 03-29-2007, 10:24 AM

I ditto the advice.

Although I try not to get too "cosmic" about a sequence of events, it seems like God/Cosmos is placing this job squarely in your hands for some reason.

For whatever reason, the partnership between you and your child has not been able to muster the grades. And forget about blaming yourself - nobody is blaming, just assessing.

Given the well paid money that's in front of you, I'd take it as a sign to pay for a tutor to give him the attn. he needs the next 6 months and actually think about it maybe for a little bit longer term until he learns to accept responsibility for his own academic career.

I wish you well.

**gackle** · 03-29-2007, 10:27 AM

Help your son. I don't know your entire financial situation, but money isn't everything and your son will know and be grateful that you put him as your priority. To stick with the financial motif, you will be "investing" in his future. Also, if he is allowed to fail, how would that affect his self-esteem? I don't think it would be a decision you would regret in ten years.

**boefixepa** · 03-29-2007, 10:45 AM

There is much more at play here than we can tell from the post you made. Why is your son doing so poorly? Honestly, shcool is so easy (technichally) that most kids do not do porrly because the lack the brains! There is something else going on. Motivation? Emotional Problems? Social Problems? Ect. The lack of not doing the minimum school work required is really just an outward sign of a more likely problem. You may have to 'treat the symptom' to get him qualified for summer school, but the problem will just resurface the next year if you don't find and solve the underlaying problem. I can't say with any certainty which solution would serve your situation better, but whatever you do.....put the child first!!! IF that means working so he can get professional help...fine...if it means making less and spending more time with him then do it. You can figure this out! Talk to him and to qualified consoulers, and not just the school ones, but ones that are use to dealing with teens and the issues the go through.

This is the age where all three of my brothers 'fell of the band wagon' so to speak. Bad grades where just a part of it, not the real problem. I watcahed my parents go through h#$^ trying to help my brothers. I don't know the extent of the siuation, but I can almost garantee grades are not the root issue.

GOOD LUCK!! and don't give up, you can do this!!

**PrincessPerky** · 03-29-2007, 11:20 AM

Originally posted by boefixepa View Post

There is much more at play here than we can tell from the post you made. Why is your son doing so poorly? Honestly, shcool is so easy (technichally) that most kids do not do porrly because the lack the brains! There is something else going on. Motivation? Emotional Problems? Social Problems? Ect. The lack of not doing the minimum school work required is really just an outward sign of a more likely problem. You may have to 'treat the symptom' to get him qualified for summer school, but the problem will just resurface the next year if you don't find and solve the underlaying problem. I can't say with any certainty which solution would serve your situation better, but whatever you do.....put the child first!!! IF that means working so he can get professional help...fine...if it means making less and spending more time with him then do it. You can figure this out! Talk to him and to qualified consoulers, and not just the school ones, but ones that are use to dealing with teens and the issues the go through.

This is the age where all three of my brothers 'fell of the band wagon' so to speak. Bad grades where just a part of it, not the real problem. I watcahed my parents go through h#$^ trying to help my brothers. I don't know the extent of the siuation, but I can almost garantee grades are not the root issue.

GOOD LUCK!! and don't give up, you can do this!!

Ditto

**th_tan** · 03-29-2007, 12:36 PM

If you can provide food on the table and pay the mortgage without the job, then your son should be your priority, no questions asked.

**Ima saver** · 03-29-2007, 12:44 PM

I would hire a tutor!!

**pearlieq** · 03-29-2007, 02:07 PM

I would take the job. The family's security is tantamount.

You will find there are many resources (tutors, teachers, family, friends) to help keep your son on the straight & narrow. The money you earn will give you choices and opportunities.

Your son is old enough to be accountable for his actions. You can offer him all of the help in the world, but he still needs to be motivated to take it. You can't put yourself at risk because of his issues.

**nanamom** · 03-29-2007, 03:36 PM

I agree with the couple posts that ask why he is failing since school can be a cake walk anymore. The other thing I agree with is to put your son first. However, I don't agree that that means making sure he doesn't fail a grade. There comes a time when kids need to be taught about consequences and sometimes that means not bailing him out. Kind of that tough love thing. Depends on why he reached this point. You know him best but don't feel obligated to fix all his mistakes.

**Coleroo** · 03-30-2007, 08:10 AM

I'd say invest in your son instead. Unless he's a genius like einstein or an entreprenuer like bill gates, he's going to need a college education to get ahead in the world, provide for his family, and secure his financial well being. The money you are paid on this job right now - in lieu of helping your son instead - could end up costing your decendants millions in potential revenue years from now.

**tabbycat31** · 03-30-2007, 08:28 AM

I'd hire a tutor. I was failing math for most of my junior year (mostly due to illness being that I missed one straight month of school and the teacher wouldnt make accommodations for me). At the midterm was when I hit my low point, I got a 46 (out of 100). My parents then decided to hire a tutor (who was student teaching in my class so I already knew her) and my score on the final was 83. Huge difference there, and the tutor worked.

**JanH** · 03-30-2007, 09:05 AM

Could you both hire a tutor and also get more involved with his studies at the same time? Some kids might do better with an outside tutor and some with the parents. I wonder if a combination would work? Some students tutor (DD was asked to be one for awhile) and some teachers might tutor, also. Here, I've known kids going to centers like tina suggested. Then you can reinforce what he is doing there.

**tabbycat31** · 03-30-2007, 06:05 PM

what subject is he struggling in? ANd when does your school year end? I would find a tutor (if you have a college nearby, choose a major of whatever subject he's struggling in).

Most college students will have reasonable prices. I'd put flyers or post on your local Craigslist

10 Weeks or 2nd job offer?