Has anyone lied to you about their finances

[Ima saver]

Re: Has anyone lied to you about their finances

When I say to my girlfriend, "we can't afford that" she will come back and me and say, of course you can afford it, you have thousands and thousands in saving!!! I guess I should say, we chose NOT to afford it. We choose NOT to waste our money on that particular object. But that is her mindset. She thinks if you have the money, you should buy anything you want. I don't see it that way.

[sarah]

Re: Has anyone lied to you about their finances

I tend not to discuss money with any one outside of my family. My sister and I are very open about money matters but otherwise I am quite closed mouthed.

[sweeps]

Re: Has anyone lied to you about their finances

Have you ever been aware of someone having lied to you about their money situation?

Do you know why they lied? To brag? To cover shame? To prevent you from worrying about them? To convince you of their reliability? To cover that they really had more money than they wanted you to believe? To persuade you to pay for something that they would otherwise have paid for?

Yes, Congress.

[cschin4]

Re: Has anyone lied to you about their finances

Discussing money with others is often a "no win" situation. If you make more than others or are better at managing/investing, then you may come across as bragging. And, there are some subjects that can be kept personal. It is not a question of being truthful but of choosing to discuss personal subjects or not.

[katwoman]

Re: Has anyone lied to you about their finances

I have no issue when it comes to money. Anyone can ask me and I tell them the truth. If they want to know exact amounts, well, that is off limits but fortunately, no one asks, probably because they know I will ask right back!

One thing I don't like and never do is cry poor mouth, unlike other people I know.

[sarah4554]

Re: Has anyone lied to you about their finances

I talk about our finances with my mom because she is a worrier and if she doesn't have all the facts she gets herself all frazzled. As far as other family members and friends I try hard to be vague but when questioned I will just answer that we live below our means. We both make a good living we just don't have the need or desire for the McMansions or the fancy cars it is just not us.

As far as others lying about their finances I know many people that own very expensive homes ($500,000 and up) that live paycheck to paycheck. They are so busy trying to impress everyone with all that they have, but working long hours to barely afford it all.

I never ask people about how much money they make or what their purchases cost but many times people seem to want to share. One afternoon my friend came over and was bragging about their latest purchases, then not a couple minutes later she was complaining that her husband did not make enough money. He makes 83,000 a year (she doesn't work) they just moved into a 420,000 home a year ago, there credit cards are maxed out, and they have already taken a home equity line of credit out on their home.

If this was my life I would go to bed with a stomach every night!

[fairy74]

Re: Has anyone lied to you about their finances

I think many, many times. Actually any time someone says something financial I take it with "the entire salt shaker" so to speak. I enjoy this forum because people are open about finances, without being braggarts.

[boefixepa]

Re: Has anyone lied to you about their finances

This is a hard one. It completely depends with whom I am speaking. I will lie to my mother, or flat out tell her I am not going to talk about it. Same is true if I am talking to another family member and it might get back to her. I just have a real hard time with my family and their gossip. Now my close friends I don't mind talking to them, but we generally talk in generalities. I am still seeing how I feel about talking with my soon to be mother in law, but thing there are looking promising as she has been very open about entering retirement just about the time we get married. I am very open here and don't have any problems sharing the details. So it really depends on my audience and how much I trust them.

[Hez]

Re: Has anyone lied to you about their finances

It doesn't sound like your friend was lying at all. He probably believes that money is really tight. The reason it is tight is because they go out and blow it on things like custom motorcycles. I know a lot of people like that.

I have some friends like that. Luckily we're all pretty open with one another about what we make and how much we spend, but it's interesting what some people view as necessary purchases. I remember this one month money was pretty tight for me, and I was complaining to my best friend about how after taxes I was earning just enough to pay my bills. She said "Don't worry that's all I earn every month" when I know that's not true - she may spend her whole paycheque but a lot of it goes to frivolous things, not just regular expenses like rent, food, phone, transportation, hydro, etc.

[disneysteve]

Re: Has anyone lied to you about their finances

it's interesting what some people view as necessary purchases.

Absolutely. More than once, I've had a conversation with someone and the topic turned to money being tight. I suggested that they cancel their cable tv and they looked at me like I had 2 heads. I'd think they'd rather give up food.

[savvy06]

Re: Has anyone lied to you about their finances

It will depends on whom I am speaking with. My side of the family are frugal and good savers and we're very comfortable talking about money. I know exactly what and how much they have, and they also know everything about us. My husband's family doesn't like to talk about finances of any kind, and are secretive as if we didn't know that they are all broke and constantly getting financial help from my in-laws. It doesn't effect my life so I really don't care. As far as friends, some are good with their money, and some are not, so I'm careful with whom I'm speaking because I don't like to be perceived as being a bragger. But I've noticed that when we're all together, and the topic of money comes up, the ones who are less off are more quiet and a little uncomfortable with the topic.

[rob62521]

Re: Has anyone lied to you about their finances

Yes, Congress.

You hit the nail right on the head with this one!

When I first read this thread, I thought, I wouldn't lie about my finances, and then thought about it, and I'm guilty of doing just that.

My mother died a few months ago. She had some life insurance, but not a whole lot. My name was on her house, and checking account. For the past couple of years I had paid to have her lawn mowed, bought much of her groceries, etc. Her life insurance wasn't sufficient to pay for her funeral and believe me, it wasn't a fancy one. So, until I could sell the house, I paid for the expenses and the rest of the funeral. A relative who hadn't had anything to do with my mom for over 35 years is now on the scene and he was asking how much the funeral cost, if I sold the house, did I inherit anything? I basically either avoided the questions, or gave vague answers. I guess I don't trust his motive for asking. I didn't inherit a lot and I have had to go through a lot of trouble getting stuff paid (hospital bills, etc.) and figure it's really none of his business. He suddenly has taken in interest in me and I'm uncomfortable with the fact he wants to know about what I make, etc. I feel like he wants something.

[timetosave]

Re: Has anyone lied to you about their finances

I've been lying to myself about my finances for years...never to others though. I think it is much harder to be honest with myself, but I'm doing it now!

G

[Elgin526]

Re: Has anyone lied to you about their finances

Yes, Congress.

: :

Funny and sad at the same time!

[shelbylovesmelby]

Re: Has anyone lied to you about their finances

Yes, Congress.

SOO TRUE!

I had a friend who would look like a street pedlar w/ the overcoat & oodles of credit cards hanging off their jacket (on tv paradys it was always fake watches KWIM?) & was proud to show everyone how much spending power she had ect. Then maybe a few yrs later.... I got a call for her to borrow $ or they'd repo her car. Apparently we didn't have our priorities straight from the get-go now did we? Needless to say I didn't borrow her the $ as I didn't think I could afford not to get it back KWIM? Then 9 mo later she got canned from her job for writing a bum check to them & never came up with the $... but came up w/ plenty of excuses. So needless to say she wasn't as well off as she portrayed.