Just thinking Question

**LuxLiving** · 10-21-2006, 06:45 AM

Re: Just thinking Question

The Hubster and I have discussed this - I get the feeling that with sooooo many Highly Visible people who just happen to 'make it' Hollywood style or sign that multi-million dollar sports contract or bust into a fortune by chance in the dotcom world or win it all on a poker gameshow or get that lucky break of appearing on a reality show nowadays - that MANY MORE (dare I say a majority?) of the younger set feel their turn is just around the corner when they too will bypass all the hard work and will arrive as if by magic into their new found wealth and fame.

Good question. I look forward to reading the replies.

**JanH** · 10-21-2006, 09:26 AM

Re: Just thinking Question

We didn't have money in the 80's. So I can't help you there. All I can remember is that interest rates on things like cars were very high cos we had to buy one during that time when ours quit. We had two little kids, had a rented house and a lemon of a car with high interest rates. So we lived in our own little world I guess. The end of the 80's and the early 90's were the beginning of the entitlement era here. Hubby recruited from colleges for his job and the demand was high. Kids were graduating with starting salaries of up to 60,000 for those in real demand. We started out the beginning of the 80's at 25,000. So you can see where they started the buying spree. Also, some of the kids hired in at all levels didn't have a good work ethic. They didn't want to put any effort in and felt entitled to the pay without it. That's what worried me before the credit boom. Now I worry about these kids getting in over their heads with credit. It sounds like from this forum that a lot of the younger set here have their head on straight. That's wonderful.

**budgetmom** · 10-21-2006, 10:08 AM

Re: Just thinking Question

I didn't see any of that money in the 80's. We were a pretty poor bunch my whole life. It's been difficult trying to break the cycle of all those learned behaviors. It seemed like there was lots of money floating around elsewhere though. Friends and neighbors always "had" and even though the family business was loosing money (according to my uncle) he still managed to buy 2 homes from the ground up in 5 years and sell one of them off, keeping the other one for himself.
As for the entitlement theory, well, I'm inclined to agree. I see it every day with DH, who is of that generation more than I. Case in point, he is going to start fishing for a raise at work. But...he goes in to work most day late-things of this nature. I tell you who would want to give someone more money for doing that? But the feels that he is intitled to do that and that he is intitled to a raise because of his base certifications in his field. I beg to differ...

**lgslgs** · 10-21-2006, 10:26 AM

Re: Just thinking Question

Have you ever read the book "The American Frugal Housewife"? It was published in 1833, but is readily available in reprint.

She mentions folks who live beyond their means, spending foolishly to keep up with neighbors, fashion, or image - and also talks about plenty of them going into hock to do so.

After reading that, I'm pretty sure that people now are no more excessive than they were in the past. The things they waste their money on might change from generation to generation, but it's nothing new. The 1800's fancy fabrics, laces and carriages are no different than the 1980's cars and suits and the 2006's granite countertops and over the top "outdoor spaces" patio junk.

Lynda

**humandraydel** · 10-21-2006, 12:10 PM

Re: Just thinking Question

Originally posted by lgslgs

Have you ever read the book "The American Frugal Housewife"? It was published in 1833, but is readily available in reprint.

She mentions folks who live beyond their means, spending foolishly to keep up with neighbors, fashion, or image - and also talks about plenty of them going into hock to do so.

After reading that, I'm pretty sure that people now are no more excessive than they were in the past. The things they waste their money on might change from generation to generation, but it's nothing new. The 1800's fancy fabrics, laces and carriages are no different than the 1980's cars and suits and the 2006's granite countertops and over the top "outdoor spaces" patio junk.

Interesting book, I want to read it! Another good example of this is the ever popular "Walden" by Thoreau. One of my favorite parts of Walden is when Thoreau tells a tailor how he wants a suit made. The tailor says "Oh, they don't make them like that anymore!" Thoreau's response is "Who are THEY and why do I care what they think?"

**cschin4** · 10-21-2006, 12:32 PM

Re: Just thinking Question

I remember the 80's. At least then, hard work was thought of as a virtue and the "work hard/get reward" was still a popular notion. Nowadays, the thought of "working hard" is not something people want to do. Now, our culture worships people who "get something for nothing". Actually, I think that is a good slogan for our present culture. The "Get Something For Nothing" generation.
And, if you can somehow screw the system to enrich yourself, then we think bully for you and wish we could do so ourselves. I find it hard to teach my kids the virtue of thrift and hard work when the world around them is telling them to scam their way into a fortune.

**tinapbeana** · 10-21-2006, 03:56 PM

Re: Just thinking Question

*child of the 80s raising her hand*

let me just say my family was poor during the 80s, no ifs ands or buts. with that said, i went otschool with a lot of kids that weren't, and yes, they felt they were 'entitled' to *insert stuff here*. they felt this way because their parents, wage earners in the 80s, raised them to feel that way. a generation doesn't just become something, a generation is shaped by those before it.

the current generation for the most part was raised in households where both parents where neck deep in the rat race; yuppies roamed free, beemers and izod and dexters and keds were all the bees knees. the wage earning yuppies of the 80s raised the children of the 80s to expect that as their normal life. (on a tangent, movie/thriller buffs may want to reference the movie "American Psycho").

in contrast, a lot of 'boomers' were raised by parents who experienced the depression. the experience of those parents definitely shaped the way they raised their children, and the way those children were raised shaped the adults they became.

**StressLess** · 10-22-2006, 06:44 AM

Re: Just thinking Question

You really got me thinking! I actually checked DH's reference book on tv shows to test my memory and my theory.

I don't notice such a difference between the 80's and now. But there was a huge difference between the 70's and the 80's, which may make people remember it as an especially spendy decade in contrast.

I finished h.s. in '74, so I was old enough to be aware of what was going on around me. At least at our house, it felt like a dark cloud was hanging over the whole country. There were lots of issues like Vietnam, Watergate, the energy crisis, the Iran hostage thing and inflation hanging over our heads. My dad was getting older, and each time he lost a job it got harder and harder to find another one. It got tiresome, and I think when the 80's came, Reagan made lots of people feel more hopeful, and they were ready to spend.

What I especially remember is that in the 70's, if things were tight at least it seemed like everyone was in the same boat. There were a LOT of tv shows that featured working class or downright poor families, managing to keep their dignity and a sense of humor from week to week. By the 80's, they were largely gone and replaced by shows full of glitz and glamour.

Examples:

1970's--All in the Family, Sanford and Son, Good Times, What's Happening?, Alice

1980's--Dallas, Dynasty, Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous, Miami Vice, The Cosby Show. (I concede the 80's had Roseanne.)

I don't see where the upscale stuff has ever subsided. I mean, you are just not going to see a show nowadays like that All in the Family episode where Edith cooked horsemeat for dinner because the grocery budget was so tight!

Edit: As far as amassing wealth vs. buying on credit--I remember the stock market being big in the 80's, until the crash in '87. There was talk about the "wealth effect," with people spending more because the stock in their retirement accounts went up so high and they felt rich. Recently, it's been more about feeling rich because of your house's value going up. Same problem, as far as I can see. The stock or house only have value on paper, until you sell them. You are counting chickens before they are hatched.

**kealina** · 10-22-2006, 01:18 PM

Re: Just thinking Question

Originally posted by MonkeyMama

There appears to be a lot of greed and feelings of entitlement in our society.

My sister is the same way. I have no idea how we were raised by the same parents - she has such a strong sense of entitlement.

This is definitely the "I want it NOW" generation coming up into adulthood.
What do you think??

i definately agree that there are many people with entitlement issues and i also agree with tina that many of them came from parents that raised them to feel that way...of course, like the original poster, sometimes i wonder how parents can raise two siblings to come out more different... both DH and i have siblings who are soooo spoiled it's amazing because you wouldn't know we come from the same parents... in both cases, it's usually because of some type of guilt or overcompensation and a few other causes...

as for me, my perspective is simple and old-fashioned and and even my friends in high school were from struggling families. i wasn't really exposed to excess until about 6 years ago and sometimes it still really boggles my mind... i could get into some family examples but then i might start ranting... let's just say that there is behavior all around that sometimes causes me worry that eventually they will be knocking at my door with their entitlement and debts... DH and i discuss it occasionally wondering how it will all work out and it worries us...

**sarah** · 10-22-2006, 01:34 PM

Re: Just thinking Question

Fascinating Thread

**Ima saver** · 10-22-2006, 02:06 PM

Re: Just thinking Question

We moved to the mountains in the 80's, so we lived in a pretty, poor rural environment. My husband got a job building houses for $7.50 and hour and I waited tables for $2.01 an hour plus very few tips. So, we lived on about $400 a week, but life was good. I have never felt entitled to anything unless I work real hard for it.
I saw on Dr. Phil Friday about a young woman who felt entitled to expensive stuff. She ran up her credit card to $38,000, lost her job, but still keeps on buying and buying. She says she deserves it! She just bought at 52 inch plazma tv because she deserves it. she lives at home (about age 30) and pays no bills.

**shelbylovesmelby** · 10-22-2006, 02:16 PM

Re: Just thinking Question

I don't know about the excess' of the 80's as I too was pretty young to recall much.

Also my mom was one of those who was collecting unemployment more than working so I don't know about greed, I had to learn & accept less to survive.

**shelbylovesmelby** · 10-22-2006, 02:24 PM

Re: Just thinking Question

Originally posted by Ima saver

I saw on Dr. Phil Friday about a young woman who felt entitled to expensive stuff. She ran up her credit card to $38,000, lost her job, but still keeps on buying and buying. She says she deserves it! She just bought at 52 inch plazma tv because she deserves it. she lives at home (about age 30) and pays no bills.

Ok that's about as sick as the family on one either wife swap or trading spouses (can't recall wich one) but the 14yr old thought her friends would not like her if she didn't wear designer clothes. The girl, 12 yr old sis, & her mom thought nothing about spending $260 on a pair of JEANS!

HELLO!?!?! The mom spent 30K on an area outside for Yoga (I think, or meditaion of some sort) & never uses it. Doesn't even bat an eyelash! Heck the dad even told the 14yr old who threw a fit when the more frugal mom gave her a plain t-shir, jeans, & hankerchief to wear, & dad promised her $5k if she'd shut up & suck it up!!!!

Heck they didn't even know what bleach was when the frugal mom told her either you clean out this chicken pen for the rabbit, or the rabbit is dinner!

I wish I was given $5k everytime I'd been puked on by a child of mine or had to clean something gross up ect!

If they need another child & some grand kids where do I apply?!?!?!

**Ima saver** · 10-22-2006, 02:33 PM

Re: Just thinking Question

You do mean $5 dollars don't you, certainly not $5000? For $260 , I could get about 26 pairs of jeans, not that I would need that many.

Just thinking Question