I don't believe in allowances

[Diolla]

Re: I don't believe in allowances

I don't give my son an allowance.

I give him the money I have budgeted for school expenses and it is up to him to distribute it (pay his lunches, bus, school supplies) I never ask for it back so if he saves some by walking home or not having pizza for lunch he gets to keep it. I also don't supplement it so if he spends more (like for an extra slice of pizza or an extra fancy backpack) he has to come up with that from his funds.

He has chores he has to do around the house because everyone has to work to keep things running smoothly. He has to take out the trash and take care of his dog, sort and take out the recycleables. He also makes dinner once a week.

If he does extra like mow the grass, wash the car etc...I pay him. He also collects cans, babysits and does odd jobs. I also pay him for 'A's. He has to work hard to get an A and gets paid accordingly for working hard for those A's. I don't charge him for C's but anything under a C the punishment is alot worse than any money I could charge him.

He sets aside 10% of everything he earns for savings, gives 10% to the church and pays 1/2 the cost of his math tutor from his money. I am very pleased with him.

[boefixepa]

Re: I don't believe in allowances

Diolla! Sounds like you are doing great with him! Good system!

I've also noticed the kid makes a big difference. There are natuaral spenders (everyone in my family but me!) and natural savers. I'm neither. As a kid I tried to save for things, but the money was stolen, or begged off of me, so I learned to get what I needed quickly or hide the money. Though I was often a participant in the hunt for hidden money in my house. When I needed to save for something I was fine, I just had to hide the money. But just saving with nothing in mind never entered my mind as a child.

[LuxLiving]

Re: I don't believe in allowances

There where times I really felt like I was getting the short end of the deal. Especially watching so many of my friends who were given so much more, and I honestly think my parents would have given me more if they had it to give, they didn't. In the end I turned out with a really great work ethic and a do-it-myself additude. My brothers...well they ended up with an entitlement attitude....can't figure out how sometimes, but they did. One thing I did learn looking back is that life is not fair. Comparing your position in life to someone you think is better off than you does nothing to improve your situation. I learned if you work hard and you don't get want you want...work harder. So far I've never not gotten what I want. So it's worked so far...where there's a will there's a way!

Neat article - religious slant on comparisons:
Rooting for the Joneses!

http://www.beliefnet.com/story/165/story_16503_1.html?WT.mc_id=NL54

[Bookie]

Re: I don't believe in allowances

*Note to self: Delete Broken Arrow's allowance as a budget line item.*

[vsjhoc]

Re: I don't believe in allowances

*Note to self: Delete Broken Arrow's allowance as a budget line item.*

Does this mean Bookie is BA's dad?? Is this like the end of Star Wars???

[boefixepa]

Re: I don't believe in allowances

Good article LUX and so true!

Steven Covey coined the idea, sacrity mentality. It means that if another person has some kind of good fortune then you are somehow excluded. AKA - from my sister - 'grandma never made me a quilt!' . He has a name of it's opposite, but I don't remember exactly what he called it, let's say surplus mentaly, that there is more than enough for all and then some. If you have that attitide the respone would be, 'oh, what a wonderful keepsake to pass onto your children,' See the difference....attitude and perception go a long way

[Broken Arrow]

Re: I don't believe in allowances

*Note to self: Delete Broken Arrow's allowance as a budget line item.*

[Luke] Nnooooooooo!!!!!! [/Luke]

[Ima saver]

Re: I don't believe in allowances

I think broken arrow is looking to get adopted! I told him i had his room ready!

[Broken Arrow]

Re: I don't believe in allowances

Hey, Ima er mom. I need $50 to go to the movies with my buddies!

[Bookie]

Re: I don't believe in allowances

I think broken arrow is looking to get adopted! I told him i had his room ready!

Julie, we need to talk privately first -- It's about the sushi thing.

[naturalwoman]

Re: I don't believe in allowances

my daughter works for her money too. occassionally she will get a bonus and i will give her $1 or $2, but not often.

[Broken Arrow]

Re: I don't believe in allowances

Julie, we need to talk privately first -- It's about the sushi thing.

Better make that $150, mom! My friends and I are going to go eat afterwards.

[nhangel]

Re: I don't believe in allowances

I also agree I always had to work for anything that I wanted. Now that I am older I am so glad that I was taught that way.

[PrincessPerky]

Re: I don't believe in allowances

just wanted to say ditto, I posted a way to long comment on ATATATs blog, so I will refrain from boring the world with it again.

I will just say, I only pay kids to do 'MY work' not their own...and for the most part I don't do that either (you want me to put the towels away, that you can't reach, how about you put my socks away while I do that...)

[cptacek]

Re: I don't believe in allowances

I started working on the tractor when I was 10. My dad would sit with me for the first few rounds, so I wouldn't hit a fence or anything with the disc, but after that he would leave either to another tractor or some other farm work that needed to be done. We also did other farm work like building and fixing fence, cattle work.

Our system at home was "if you worked outside with Dad, you didn't have to make supper, set the table, or do dishes for Mom." That worked out great for me at the time, because I would work outside all day and then didn't have to do anything when I got home. But, if I didn't go with Dad, we would have to do dishes, clean the house, wash clothes, anything else that Mom needed done.

I say at the time because I have a very hard time making supper, setting the table, doing dishes, cleaning up the house, etc, now. I don't think I have the skills for it (I do have the skills to do it, but I don't THINK I have the skills to do it). I remember when one of my sisters was about 13 and she made an entire meal for our whole family and had it ready (and hot!) when we were coming back from working...there were at least 10 people she had to cook for that day, so she was really hustling. I remember, I don't think I could do that, and I was in college already!

We didn't get paid for any of the farm work. That was the family busines, so if we wanted the family to make it, we had to do it. My dad and uncle also started a roofing and siding business. My uncle had two daughters and my dad had four daughters old enough to work on the roof, so that's what we did (as well as the farm work) for about 8 years...I did it all through high school, and summers during college. That sure made us want to get our educations! We did get paid for the roofing, but we started out at $2 an hour...I think by the time I was out of school, I could have done any job on that roof, and I topped out at $8 an hour.


We were in 4-H and always had sheep that we would sell at the county fair. That money had to last us through the year, and most of us saved it up for college...when you are 20 miles from the nearest town and an hour from the nearest Walmart, you don't tend to spend that much money.

My parents provided us with a car and paid for gas (note, I didn't say "bought us a car"...it was truly the family car) We never got an allowance, that's for sure. But, I don't remember wanting something I couldn't buy, cause if they didn't buy it, I could dip into my lamb money. I didn't too often, but I could.