I'm Being a Big Baby, Aren't I?

[shengmei]

Re: I'm Being a Big Baby, Aren't I?

My father used to play mai jong (Chinese poker) with his friends and bring home "winnings" when in fact they were money withdrawn from his bank account in order to make my mom feel better about his gambling.

Not only that, he got drunk and inpregnated a woman in his mai jong club.

Gambling is so not worth it.

[Ima saver]

Re: I'm Being a Big Baby, Aren't I?

Wonder if she had that talk with her husband yet?

[greedy4chips]

Re: I'm Being a Big Baby, Aren't I?

What if you became a stripper or hooker and made tons of money and didn't share it with him?

I know that is a ridiculous question, but it isn't what he spends his time on that bothers you the most is it? What you are looking for is a husband you care share your thoughts and feelings with.

Ask him to cut back to 1 night a week. If he can't cut down, then perhaps he is addicted. I am sure he wouldn't want you to be out doing your hobby while he was home either.

I think it is time for a long heartfelt discussion on where your relationship is and where it is going. My wife kicks my butt all the time to get my priorities back in line! I respect her more and more for having the right things in life prioritized and setting me straight when I wander.

I promoted poker for 2+ yrs on my website. I make $600+/month from revenue. I use to play a ton and it did get out of hand. I was making another $400 the last couple months playing poker. I played low stakes. Eventually I moved up to the $1/$2 tables in an effort to increase my income and did well, but honestly I was spending too much time doing it.

After a little talk we decided that my playing time was hindering our relationship and I cut back cold turkey. After 3+ months I finally played again and have no real desire to play...the addiction lost it's appeal.

[Ima saver]

Re: I'm Being a Big Baby, Aren't I?

Wow, good for you greedyforchips!!!

[pearlieq]

Re: I'm Being a Big Baby, Aren't I?

OP checking back in here...

DH and I did finally get a chance to talk. We've had my brother staying with us for a few days since my mom's birthday is this week, so it took a little while to get a moment alone.

We had a really good talk--no hard feelings or upset on either side. He was able to pretty easily see my perspective on the situations and felt that the things I was asking for were reasonable and do-able.

He was quite chagrined when I brought up the iPod situation, and admitted that he just hadn't been thinking. That's pretty typical of him, and I've know that for years. He's never malicious, just occasionally thoughtless. Now that I've pointed it out, I doubt he'll make the same mistake again.

We've agreed upon a poker bankroll and set up a joint account to hold the money. Any money above and beyond his bankroll will go into the family budget, which we plan jointly.

For my part, I went out and registered for the Spanish class I've always talked about taking. It starts today. I also signed up for a 5 week class on investing. I found a local church to go visit, since it's really high time I get back involved. Finally, I think I'm going to volunteer for some extra shifts at the pet shelter I've been working with for the past year.

All in all, I'm happy with how things turned out and I feel better about the situation. I really appreciate everyone's help in thinking this through!

[Ima saver]

Re: I'm Being a Big Baby, Aren't I?

Wow, you really made a lot of progress by talking to your husband. That is great!

[Broken Arrow]

Re: I'm Being a Big Baby, Aren't I?

Good for you, Pearlieq!

[LuxLiving]

Re: I'm Being a Big Baby, Aren't I?

Congratulations - sounds like you are both making adjustments! Good for you guys!!!

[disneysteve]

Re: I'm Being a Big Baby, Aren't I?

That's great pearlieq! Or should I say "¡Fantastico!"

[greedy4chips]

Re: I'm Being a Big Baby, Aren't I?

Perhaps you should seek a career in negotiations!

Congrats!

[jasminecox]

Yes!. You are.

[GoodSteward]

I hope this worked out.