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I had an interesting talk yesterday with a woman who basicallly told me her life story. She saw me reading a book for parents regarding teaching purity to your daughters and that is what started the conversation. She started by saying she felt purity was old fashioned and under-rated (then went on to tell me she was an active member in the Baptist Church, which struck a chord with me as the Baptist I know are very much in favor of purity).
Anyway, she stated her children could date at any age, and she allowed her children to have overnight guests of the same sex at home, because they would "do it anyway". That truck chord #2 with me as I volunteer at a crisis center and am a former director of one. Most of hers were dating by age 12 or 13. She also provided her minor children with cigs and alcohol for the same reason--they would anyway.
She has 6 children. None are married, all 6 have at least one child and still live at home. The oldest is 24. The youngest is 14 and has a 6 week old baby. So, knowing that morally she felt it was ok, I approached it from the financial side. She admitted she and her husband are raising 8 grandchildren in addition to the 6 children still living at home. She said it has been a strain on the billfold. 3 of the grandchildrens births were not covered by her husbands medical insurance, so they paid for that out of pocket. They have nothing saved for retirement and are in their late 40's.
2 of her kids have also been in and out of rehab several times. Only 2 of the 6 are employeed and help out at home with any bills. Some of them have their boyfriends or girlfriends living with them as well (babies daddy or babies momma)
Yet, she didn't see a connection between how choices that parents make with their kids, and choices kids make seem to effect ones life for years and years if not forever.
Do others see this or am I just an old fashioned fuddy duddy???
Anyway, she stated her children could date at any age, and she allowed her children to have overnight guests of the same sex at home, because they would "do it anyway". That truck chord #2 with me as I volunteer at a crisis center and am a former director of one. Most of hers were dating by age 12 or 13. She also provided her minor children with cigs and alcohol for the same reason--they would anyway.
She has 6 children. None are married, all 6 have at least one child and still live at home. The oldest is 24. The youngest is 14 and has a 6 week old baby. So, knowing that morally she felt it was ok, I approached it from the financial side. She admitted she and her husband are raising 8 grandchildren in addition to the 6 children still living at home. She said it has been a strain on the billfold. 3 of the grandchildrens births were not covered by her husbands medical insurance, so they paid for that out of pocket. They have nothing saved for retirement and are in their late 40's.
2 of her kids have also been in and out of rehab several times. Only 2 of the 6 are employeed and help out at home with any bills. Some of them have their boyfriends or girlfriends living with them as well (babies daddy or babies momma)
Yet, she didn't see a connection between how choices that parents make with their kids, and choices kids make seem to effect ones life for years and years if not forever.
Do others see this or am I just an old fashioned fuddy duddy???
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