Advice needed for £26k debt

[johnlewis]

Hi, Hopefully someone could help me.

We have about £20k in debt which includes £12k in credit card and £8k in loans from friends or and a £6000 bank loan! .. we are just about paying the credit cards off each month and we both work and we have about £1000 a month for food etc.. I have said lets not spend £1000 lets save £500 a month but she dont like that and I need to pay the 8k back from friends in jan 2018 or near that date. The cards are on 3% balance transfer and end jan. march and july 08 (I can move them about to continue not to pay much interest)

We have the house on the market for about £450k and I have said once we sell im buying a smaller house and she can buy a smaller house because I cant deal with her and the way she is with money! I will rent my house out and live in her house. and give her 50% of the rent and we pay £250 a month morgage (very cheap as we only owe 50k) and we have a buyer but the buyer needs to sell there house. Selling the house would mean all debts paid back! So im forward thinking about this and want to rent part of the house out. We have a 5 bedroom house that 3 of the rooms could be used. yes its not ideal but it would give about £1500 a month in extra income. However the wife is doing as much as she can not to do this. agreeing to rent a room to a couple for £650 then making it as hard as I can to do it.

Personally, I dont care. I feel that the money we owe needs to be repaid. If it means 12 months of having a house with people in then so be it. She would rather use a room for her clothes then to rent it for £400 a month. The house is Just me, her and a 9 year old child.

What do you think about it? even renting one room to a couple for £650 would mean not selling the house and just use to repay.. will take longer but I can do 3% balance transfer on credit cards etc....

[Nutria]

I have said lets not spend £1000 lets save £500 a month but she dont like that

We have a 5 bedroom house that 3 of the rooms could be used. yes its not ideal but it would give about £1500 a month in extra income. However the wife is doing as much as she can not to do this. agreeing to rent a room to a couple for £650 then making it as hard as I can to do it.

This has to be fixed first. (Are you sure she realizes your joint debt problem?)

What do you think about it? even renting one room to a couple for £650 would mean not selling the house and just use to repay.

Taking in lodgers is a time-honored solution to the problem of needing more money.

[msomnipotent]

I wouldn't want to take in renters with a 9 year old in the house. I can see why she is reluctant to do that, but other things need to be addressed. Not to get personal, but how did you get into debt? Is she not agreeing to saving 500 pounds because she can't see how to cut the budget by 50%, or she just wants to spend money? Is she using a spare bedroom because you don't have closets and the wardrobe is already full, or does she really have that much clothing?

[snafu]

You and wife must find a way to agree on how much money is spent and how much money is saved. Until that happens you will both become more and more dissatisfied.

I suggest you use a marker and paper to write down your net income [how much money comes in] top right, and subtract how much goes out from most important like... HOUSING, mortgage, utilities [electric/heat/water/trash/ phone[s], insurance], FOOD [grocery/take-away/restaurant].TRANSPORTATION [vehicle loan/operation/maintenance/insurance/parking], BANK LOAN [60K, CREDIT CARDS, 8K PERSONAL LOANS.

Does your wife want to keep your relationship or does she want to be free to pay for her stuff herself? Do you see yourself as a 'cash cow?'

I suggest you and wife each go through stuff, marking items you no longer use and don't use For Sale. Take photos of each, write a short ad and list For Sale on whatever on-line sites are popular in your area. It's a lot of work and expensive to move stuff you don't use and don't need. Price at least one half replacement value if in good condition! Trash/recycle anything broken. get it gone. Send old clothes you no longer wear to a charity outlet/church. Items in pristine condition to consignment. You don't get much but it's expensive to move stuff!

[DaveONeill]

That's not such a straight forward position to be in. However, it is done, I would swap swap the high interest debt for low interest and longer term, it might even be possible to roll over your entire debt in to a single loan. The loan could be an equity release from your current mortgage. This will give you a low repayment and remove this stress from the negotiations with your wife. The combined debt can then be paid off from teh sale of the house as you expect.

You could pay off all your debts. Remove stress from your shoulders. Make your friends happy that you paid them off quickly and early. Then you can get to the important question of how to invest and budget for the future.

My 2 cent