Please Tell Me What I Am Doing Wrong

[TRISTATE]

HERE IS MY SITUATIONS:
-----------------------
I HAVE A VERY HARD TIME BELIEVING I AM POOR WHEN I MAKE $140K PER YEAR
I HAVE A FAMILY OF 4
MONTHLY EXPENSES
MORTGAGE: $2460.00 INCLUDES TAXES AND HOME OWNERS INSURANCE (THEY DOUBLED MY TAXES 6 MONTHS AFTER I MOVED IN)
CAR PAYMENT= $254
ELECTRIC AND HEAT = $490.00
WATER = $60
2 CAR INSURANCE = $140
GAS TO WORK = 250
TOLLS TO WORK = 260
LIFE INSURANCE = $40
CREDIT LOANS = $400
FOOD AND EXPENSES = ???? WHATEVER IS LEFT.
-------------------------------------------------------
WE HAVE 2 CARS, BOTH 4 CYLINDERS AND HAVE OVER 100K MILES ON THEM. WE ARE NOT BIG SPENDERS...WE NEVER EAT OUT.
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I WORK 90 HOURS A WEEK TO KEEP UP WITH BILLS WITH NO END INSIGHT...
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i put in alot of time on computer to hopefully make it one day in internet marketing while i work a full time in the chemistry field.
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my 401k is tapped out so i can not borrow any money against it. i stopped paying my credit card bills 4 months ago. i have collectors calling all the time. everytime they call, chill just goes down my back. life is just so expensive. i pray to god and one day everything will come together. I just can not figure it out. i see people making alot less money than me living a better life. it just does not make sense!!!!!!!!
on top of it, my house is 100k under water and needs much repair.
-----------------------------------------------------------------
we are really some of the best people ...we are good people and good christians and we do not deserve this.
----------------
any advise will be apreciated.

[Bob B.]

HERE IS MY SITUATIONS:
-----------------------
I HAVE A VERY HARD TIME BELIEVING I AM POOR WHEN I MAKE $140K PER YEAR
I HAVE A FAMILY OF 4
MONTHLY EXPENSES
MORTGAGE: $2460.00 INCLUDES TAXES AND HOME OWNERS INSURANCE (THEY DOUBLED MY TAXES 6 MONTHS AFTER I MOVED IN)
CAR PAYMENT= $254
ELECTRIC AND HEAT = $490.00
WATER = $60
2 CAR INSURANCE = $140
GAS TO WORK = 250
TOLLS TO WORK = 260
LIFE INSURANCE = $40
CREDIT LOANS = $400
FOOD AND EXPENSES = ???? WHATEVER IS LEFT.
-------------------------------------------------------
WE HAVE 2 CARS, BOTH 4 CYLINDERS AND HAVE OVER 100K MILES ON THEM. WE ARE NOT BIG SPENDERS...WE NEVER EAT OUT.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I WORK 90 HOURS A WEEK TO KEEP UP WITH BILLS WITH NO END INSIGHT...
---------------------------------------------------------------------
i put in alot of time on computer to hopefully make it one day in internet marketing while i work a full time in the chemistry field.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
my 401k is tapped out so i can not borrow any money against it. i stopped paying my credit card bills 4 months ago. i have collectors calling all the time. everytime they call, chill just goes down my back. life is just so expensive. i pray to god and one day everything will come together. I just can not figure it out. i see people making alot less money than me living a better life. it just does not make sense!!!!!!!!
on top of it, my house is 100k under water and needs much repair.
-----------------------------------------------------------------
we are really some of the best people ...we are good people and good christians and we do not deserve this.
----------------
any advise will be apreciated.

Please post more detail. What is your net monthly income? List more detail on each debt, interest rate, what is due on each monthly, when each is scheduled to be paid off. Give as much detail as you can on the food and expenses category, cost of cable/satellite service, monthly internet cost, any bill that you pay each month.

As you have already figured out - you have a spending problem, not an earning problem .

What do you have sitting around the house that you can sell?

There are many knowledgable people here that can give great advice. You'll get the best advice if you can post as much detail as possible.

[50Sense]

The math doesnt add up.

If you annualize the expenses you listed it comes out to about 52k, and you make 140k a year.

That's A LOT of unaccounted for income.


I would take a long honest look at your spending -- you can export the last few months of banking activity into excel and get it down to the penny instead of going off of rough estimates. Before you can find solutions, you need to know what is really going on with your money.

[bjl584]

As already stated, the math is off. More than half your income is unaccounted for. What are you spending money on? Can you list a more detailed budget? I think it would be a beneficial exercise for you to track your spending for a month. Write down where every penny goes. Only then will you be able to get a handle on it.

[Michael Thompson]

I think you should record your spendings and write down your budget based on the spendings. You should create an excel file with all your payment, pending payments, interest rate, the name of creditor etc. You have to make a schedule to write your every penny which you are spending daily. DO this exercise daily for at least one month. This will give you better idea to handle with your debts. Good luck

[Eagle]

HERE IS MY SITUATIONS:
-----------------------
I HAVE A VERY HARD TIME BELIEVING I AM POOR WHEN I MAKE $140K PER YEAR
I HAVE A FAMILY OF 4
MONTHLY EXPENSES
MORTGAGE: $2460.00 INCLUDES TAXES AND HOME OWNERS INSURANCE (THEY DOUBLED MY TAXES 6 MONTHS AFTER I MOVED IN)
CAR PAYMENT= $254
ELECTRIC AND HEAT = $490.00
WATER = $60
2 CAR INSURANCE = $140
GAS TO WORK = 250
TOLLS TO WORK = 260
LIFE INSURANCE = $40
CREDIT LOANS = $400
FOOD AND EXPENSES = ???? WHATEVER IS LEFT.
-------------------------------------------------------
WE HAVE 2 CARS, BOTH 4 CYLINDERS AND HAVE OVER 100K MILES ON THEM. WE ARE NOT BIG SPENDERS...WE NEVER EAT OUT.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I WORK 90 HOURS A WEEK TO KEEP UP WITH BILLS WITH NO END INSIGHT...
---------------------------------------------------------------------
i put in alot of time on computer to hopefully make it one day in internet marketing while i work a full time in the chemistry field.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
my 401k is tapped out so i can not borrow any money against it. i stopped paying my credit card bills 4 months ago. i have collectors calling all the time. everytime they call, chill just goes down my back. life is just so expensive. i pray to god and one day everything will come together. I just can not figure it out. i see people making alot less money than me living a better life. it just does not make sense!!!!!!!!
on top of it, my house is 100k under water and needs much repair.
-----------------------------------------------------------------
we are really some of the best people ...we are good people and good christians and we do not deserve this.
----------------
any advise will be apreciated.

Welcome to the forums As others have said there's missing information.

Have you heard of Dave Ramsey? I think his Financial Peace University might be just what you need... Click this link and then click on "Find a Class".

Check it out. You will be glad you did.

Clearly you have a great income but do not know how to handle money.

First, you need to save up an emergency fund (savings) of $1,000.

Second, you need to get on a budget. Track your expenses with www.mint.com

Third, you need to make the commitment to spend less than you make.

Fourth, you need to determine if you're going to use the debt snowball (lowest balance first) or avalanche (highest interest) strategy in reducing your debt. Click this post about ways to get out and stay out of debt. Also click this link for understanding gazelle intensity.

Fifth, you need to save up 3 to 6 months’ worth of expenses in your emergency fund (savings).

You are not the first person to realize that your life is out of control and change is needed. Hope this helps.

Welcome again! You can do it! You can beat this debt!

[JoeP]

i see people making alot less money than me living a better life. it just does not make sense!!!!!!!!
on top of it, my house is 100k under water and needs much repair.
-----------------------------------------------------------------
we are really some of the best people ...we are good people and good christians and we do not deserve this.
----------------
any advise will be apreciated.

Regarding these comments you posted, the secret to living better lives with less is simple: live within your means and avoid debt. Look at your credit loans, car payment, and mortgage: over $3100 a month. No two ways about it, that's a LOT of money.

Also, regarding not "deserving" this, you kind of did this to yourself, didn't you? Regardless of one's religion, this happens when people overspend.

As far as getting out of this, let's wait until you post more details as others have requested. Start thinking of getting rid of a car and possibly buying a beater to free you from your car loan. Can you car pool? Electric and heat are VERY high, can you reduce consumption? How much for cell phones, internet, cable/satellite? Can you put contributions to your 401k on hold?

[disneysteve]

Start thinking of getting rid of a car and possibly buying a beater to free you from your car loan.

Without any more info, I tend to disagree with this. The car loan isn't the problem here. The payment is about 3% of monthly take home pay which is very reasonable.

We really can't give any useful advice without knowing where all the money is going. OP only listed a small portion of his expenses. There is about $45,000 not accounted for. Until we know how that is being spent, it's kind of impossible to answer the question of "What am I doing wrong?"

[Petunia 100]

Well, the first thing which jumps out at me is that last line...."FOOD AND EXPENSES = ???? WHATEVER IS LEFT."

You have to decide what you can afford to spend on food and expenses, then follow through. Stop spending "whatever is left".

[disneysteve]

Well, the first thing which jumps out at me is that last line...."FOOD AND EXPENSES = ???? WHATEVER IS LEFT."

You have to decide what you can afford to spend on food and expenses, then follow through. Stop spending "whatever is left".

It doesn't make sense anyway because "whatever is left" should amount to about $45,000/year.

We need more information.

[snafu]

TRISTATE you seem to be looking at gross income and not your net income, the sum left after deductions. You've not listed interest rates and I wonder how much of your accumulated debt can be traced back to interest charges. Would you be willing to use mint.com or a similar program to work out a budget noting each and every expense and giving it a realistic figure you can afford. What was the outcome of your appeal of increased property tax?

Is your wife onboard with the idea of getting control of finances? I suggest starting by helping your wife work out a menu plan beginning with food at hand in pantry and freezer supported by the on-line ads for loss leaders at your local grocery chains. Inventory each closet and list what is needed for summer. Excellent children's clothes can be found at consignment shops, Goodwill and thrift stores. Work out driving routes so that errands are part of regular travel. When did you last review home and auto insurance? Is coverage adequate and rates competitive? Would it be practical to reduce deductibles?

What home repairs are required? Can you list these from critical most important to least important? What tasks are DIY with instruction from You Tube? What instruction classes are available in your community from Home Depot Saturday AM classes? What free, nearly free entertainment and activities are available in your community to keep DKs involved and active this summer?

[Gailete]

I too am wondering about that electric/heat bill. I thought I had it bad with our propane bill. Are you being as frugal as possible, turning the heat down in the winter and wearing sweaters and turning the air off in the summer and when on don't turn your house into a refrigerator.

I suspect the big problem is what others have also pointed out. You are looking at your gross income as what you 'should' have to spend when in reality you only have your net after taxes, SS, 401K repayments, insurance, etc. Your net is probably only about $100,000 which is a great amount of money for anyone to make but certainly in this time and place not 'rich' at all. The top amount that you should probably be paying for your mortgage including taxes and insurance is $2000 so well below what you are currently paying.

Without more details it is hard to know where you got off track, but I can tell you that for sure you are way overspending. You can't blame that on anyone else whether you are a Christian or not. You need to get a better attitude of gratitude for what you do have. The poor me's never helped anyone out of their troubles.

[jackmiller]

The math doesnt add up.

If you annualize the expenses you listed it comes out to about 52k, and you make 140k a year.

That's A LOT of unaccounted for income.

I came to the same conclusion- need to be honest here with your budgeting and account for everything not just the easy/obvious things.

One easy way to find out where the slippage is is to crate a budget for the basics (mortgage, food etc) and to live on it for a couple months. Guarantee that you will find where the other spending is within a few weeks b.c you will catch yourself pulling the card out for something that is not in the budget.