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    New, scared, would love some different views

    Hi all,

    I used to belong here years ago and don't remember my login, oh well. Anyways, I would really love some imput on my situation. Everyone thinks different and if there's something I haven't considered I'd really appreciate the input.

    Situation is bad. We followed the Dave plan years ago. You know how it goes though, life struck us. We, my husband and I, were dual-incomed, no kids at home, just a mortgage, no cc's or debt, lived in our means, fully funded emergency fund, blah blah. Didn't count on job move and things that happens, and then the hubby was diagnosed with cancer.

    Fast forward 2 1/2 years later. Hubby fought but didn't make it. We cash flowed a lot of things and paid off as much as we could, but even with health isurance, co-pays, max out of pocket per year per person, let me tell you, it's not cheap. Big emergency fund gone, save a grand. Small life insurance policy coming, but will in no way come near what medical has accumulated to. Credit score is about to take a huge dive (we were both in the 800's). As it stands right now, the hubby was the single wage earner. I worked up til this past winter but quit job to move closer to hubby's job.

    Anyways, here's where it stands. I'm unemployed. I was about to get licensed for hair (which isn't stable, I know) but broke wrist 5 days prior to state exams. I am licensed in radiology tech, area I live in is saturated, 2 schools within an hour of each other in a rural area churning out students every year. If I were to find work doing that it would be a 2 hour drive. Not real feasible. My debt includes the mortgage which is passed solely to me, a 5k bank loan we borrowed to buy this cheaper, older home (to get rid of bigger, newer, more expensive home when we moved this past winter), and medical.

    A talk with a lawyer has advised medical bancruptcy, which I'm not fond of, but not seeing how I can overcome this medical. Did I mention I needed surgery on wrist that I broke and will be wearing an external fixator for 3 months with another month of physical therapy. So add those copays and max out of pocket on me, along with the hubby. Medical debt if i had to guess (still waiting for them all to get in) around the 40k range.

    At this point, not sure what to do. Not sure about the hair thing. Xray would have me on the road continuously in winter conditions. Should I go back to school?? Am fortunate in that there was a little bit of life insuance to pay off funeral, and some that I'm hoping will be allowed to get me by until I can work. My daughter, 23, had fortunately moved in with us before this last bout of cancer hit a few months back, and will be paying half rent and utilities. I do have a paid for '06 Honda that'a been meticulously maintained with 65k miles on her, so that's a relief.

    Am I forgetting something? Anyone have someone go through a similar situation? I still don't know what I should do for work once I am able to again. I do have 1k emergency fund, would like that higher, but for now, that's it. If all else fails I can dip into hubbies IRA, not wanting to. Just never been here, nor have anyone close to me go through this to know what options are available to me. Never thought he would be gone at 40, and I would have to even conceive of this at 41. Yeah, yeah... term life insurance. I was doing Dave's steps, before that part he was diagnosed. Couldn't even get credit life on this mortgage, I tried, was pre-existing. Shoulda coulda woulda. This is where I'm at now. Would love any input. Thank you.

    #2
    Sorry for your loss

    I am so sorry to hear of your loss. At 41, that is inconcievable to think of that happening. You seem to be in a very difficult situation, both emotionally and financially.
    Here are my thoughts for what it is worth.
    The hair career will not generate enough income to support you through the years. Is relocating to a place where a radiologist is needed possible?
    If it is not, I would consider going back to school in a field where you a fairly certain you can gain immediate employment upon graduation and earn a decent salary. At 41, I don't believe it is too late to start a second career because you have a lot of earning years left. It is difficult to give financial advice when we don't know the entire situation. Are you driven to go back to school? Can you swing life without working and attending classes? Is there a field that you have always been interested in that could offer a promising career.
    With all you have been through, I truly hope someone with better knowledge than me can give you some professional advice.

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      #3
      I am very sorry to hear about your loss and the heartache before that. I am not a believer in bankruptcy but in your case it may help you get a fresh start.

      Career wise you are probably better off as an xray tech. Yes you might have to drive during winter conditions. My husband has a long commute and it is crappy during the long New England winters but sometimes you got to do what you go to do.

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        #4
        I'm so sorry for your loss. How much medical debt are you looking at, and about how much left-over cash at hand would you have? If you would have enough to get you through the next year, I would possibly look at either going back to school or considering another move.

        If you've only got enough for a few months, I would try and find a job as an x-ray tech. It's not ideal, but it will allow you to have an income while you either try to find a new job that's closer, decide if you want to to the hair school thing, or go back to college to start a new career path.

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          #5
          First, I'm sorry for your loss, and your overall reversal of fortunes. I was 37 when I lost my first wife to cancer. Fortunately we had a couple of insurance policies through employers, and very good corporate health insurance.

          When it comes to bills & insurance, though, things fell through the cracks, and there were a few bills & charges that should have been paid, or were mistakes. Often, hospitals & doctors will settle with insurance co.s for less than you would pay- or insurers will reject claims initially, then pay when they're re-submitted.

          So, make sure all the bills are correct- call, ask, complain, re-submit- if nothing else you'll buy time. Also see if you can work out a payment plan.

          Regarding career and other life choices, choose carefully and try not to rush. Grief is difficult, and trying to get through it can lead you into making bad decisions.

          Comment


            #6
            Thanks all for the replies. Did talk today with a Dave Ramsey advisor, will be working together on it.

            Have met with retirement people, all on hold til i get more info. Real estate agent to get a feel for the market. Meeting with accountant next week to find out things. And need to see a lawyer to get his advice as well.

            No rush, no rush. Feel like there are so many things I need to be doing, but know the thing I need to do is wait and see what He has in store for me.

            Again, thanks all.

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