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  • GoodLiving
    replied
    Originally posted by myrdale View Post

    The funeral business is an absolute racket. On problem is most people don't pre-plan (I didn't say prepay) for these things. Also keep in mind, funerals are for the living, not the dead.

    ......

    Also keep in mind, it doesn't matter where they bury you, chances are, within the next 200 years, they are going to dig you up to build a Walmart.

    There is a channel on YouTube, AskAMortician that is excellent. She talks about alternatives to the modern burial process.

    Direct cremation cost are $800 or less.
    Yep, this is exactly why I want my body disposed of as cheaply and environmentally safe as possible. I don't want no fancy stuff that costs way too much. Really dig a hole deep enough and bury me to fertilize the growing of new life....if my body isn't too toxic. I LOVE AskAMortician and her books are great too. I don't want to be embalmed or any of that crap. My family is so small anyways...if I die before my spouse, enough to support them and when we're both gone everything goes to my child. I never expected an inheritance when my Dad died and I'd still rather empty my bank accounts to have him back.

    Leave a comment:


  • myrdale
    replied
    Originally posted by disneysteve View Post
    We spent almost 18K for the funeral.
    The funeral business is an absolute racket. On problem is most people don't pre-plan (I didn't say prepay) for these things. Also keep in mind, funerals are for the living, not the dead.

    Dad really doesn't care that his casket has the rose wood handles with the sterling silver trim, and the silk lined interior. If given the choice, he'd prefer the cheapest box so Mom can keep the savings.
    Embalming is not required by law. We tend to keep the body around for three or four days, cold storage is probably OK.
    You're going to have to pay to wash and dress the body, assuming you don't want to do so yourself.
    You're going to have to pay for makeup, assuming you don't want to do so yourself.
    You're going to have to pay for the crew to open / close the grave.
    There is the cost for tomb stones.
    You're going to have to pay for overhead expenses: hearse, funeral home, staff.
    We have a family plot, but if you don't have that it's another expense.
    There are cost for media shows.
    There are catering cost.
    There are even souvenirs. My mother almost paid $100 for a necklace with my grandmother's finger print for example.

    Also keep in mind, it doesn't matter where they bury you, chances are, within the next 200 years, they are going to dig you up to build a Walmart.

    There is a channel on YouTube, AskAMortician that is excellent. She talks about alternatives to the modern burial process.

    Direct cremation cost are $800 or less.

    Leave a comment:


  • disneysteve
    replied
    Originally posted by Like2Plan View Post
    The problem arises when the executor (or personal representative) needs cash to settle the estate and for final burial expenses.
    My wife and I were really wondering about this. Fortunately, covering all of the expenses ourselves wasn't a problem for us, but I'm sure most people can't do that. What happens for the 70% who live paycheck to paycheck? We spent almost 18K for the funeral. We've also paid the HOA dues, electric bill, water bill, auto insurance, home owners insurance, car payments, etc. since he died in May. As I am the sole beneficiary and he had a substantial estate, all of that money will eventually come back to us, but what would have happened if we didn't have the funds to pay all of those bills?

    Leave a comment:


  • myrdale
    replied
    Originally posted by Like2Plan View Post
    The problem arises when the executor (or personal representative) needs cash to settle the estate and for final burial expenses.
    I saw this first hand with a neighbor "John" who lived down the street from me. John was a very creepy guy who I had to have words with on more than one occasion because he liked to try and get into other's personal business.

    John died of the flu in 2017. Being that John had no family that would associate with him, he left his house to my next door neighbor "Frank" who was significantly more tolerant of this guy's proclivities than I was.

    John was a retired disabled veteran. And despite my private concerns about John, Frank did right by him, by arranging a burial in a local military grave yard.

    From what I was told, John didn't have any significant savings to fund the burial. Frank had to sale the house to pay for the burial. This took a couple of months, and to my understanding the body was kept in cold storage until it was all arranged. This did surprise me as I didn't realize long term storage of bodies was a thing.

    Frank then sold his house and used the remaining proceeds to purchase a larger home for his family.

    Leave a comment:


  • Like2Plan
    replied
    One other caution: if you have more than one beneficiary making everything POD might cause some unintended consequences. (Especially if the beneficiaries are not necessarily on congenial terms. )

    The problem arises when the executor (or personal representative) needs cash to settle the estate and for final burial expenses. If there is a house, there may be bills and taxes, etc, to keep the place running until it can be sold (or another can of worms--property that is inherited by more than one person and the deposition of the property can not be agreed upon and there are bills, taxes, etc)....

    Leave a comment:


  • myrdale
    replied
    Have a list of the accounts also and put that with your will.

    I had originally intended on listing the accounts, 401K, IRA, checking, & savings in the will itself, but the lawyer said that wasn't the way to do it. She said to confirm the beneficiaries just as you did, and then I made a list of them and jim clipped it to the will.

    I've heard Dave Ramsey discuss having a draw or folder of instructions for his family upon his death. That is probably overkill for most of us, but having a short, up to date list sure doesn't hurt.

    And make sure your beneficiaries are aware of what they are (or aren't) getting ahead of time and where to find the paper work.

    Leave a comment:


  • Like2Plan
    replied
    Originally posted by LivingAlmostLarge View Post
    How does the trusts works exactly? If it is a married couple does it need to be revised upon death of one?
    It depends on how you have it set up (and which state you live in). If you live in a state such as Washington State (with a low Estate tax threshold), you might want to get individual trusts--because the threshold is quite low--
    $2,193,000 in 2021, the estate tax above the exemption high (IMHO) and without a trust (in others words--everything passes directly to the spouse), the exemption is not preserved on the second spouse's death.

    https://dor.wa.gov/taxes-rates/other...ate-tax-tables

    Here is an example:
    "This exemption is not “portable” from one spouse to another. If a married couple has a $6 million estate and Spouse 1 dies, everything passes tax free to Spouse 2 by default. But, when Spouse 2 dies, he or she will only get one $2.193 million exemption at death – Spouse 1’s exemption is lost."

    https://alterraadvisors.com/should-i...he-estate-tax/

    (edited to add: I think this situation might make it wise to have assets as close to 50-50 as possible. )
    Last edited by Like2Plan; 07-10-2021, 02:35 PM.

    Leave a comment:


  • Scallywag
    replied
    Originally posted by disneysteve View Post

    You definitely should, especially if you're not on good terms with her. There's nothing stopping her from draining that account at any time. Not saying she would, but she could and you'd have no recourse because legally it's her money every bit as much as it is yours. Also, is it your desire for that money to go to her if you were to die?
    Off topic, but she's the one pissed with me, while I still crave a good relationship with her. But no matter how bad things get between us, she would not drain the a/c because (a) my parents are millionaires and don't need money from me and (b) she is my mother!

    I liked having the joint a/c because it was opened and domiciled in a very very tax and debtor friendly state and now I have to move it to CA, which is neither.

    Ugh.

    Had I predeceased her without knowimg this, she would likely have just cut a check to my daughter. So my concern is not that but owing taxes on my own money when she passes.

    Leave a comment:


  • disneysteve
    replied
    Originally posted by Scallywag View Post
    Now I have to figure out how to get my money out of my joint a/c with my mother. FML.
    You definitely should, especially if you're not on good terms with her. There's nothing stopping her from draining that account at any time. Not saying she would, but she could and you'd have no recourse because legally it's her money every bit as much as it is yours. Also, is it your desire for that money to go to her if you were to die?

    Leave a comment:


  • Scallywag
    replied
    Originally posted by disneysteve View Post

    It's not an issue for spouses since all assets automatically pass to the surviving spouse upon death of the first spouse. Although even with a spouse there can be issues that arise with joint accounts.

    It's more of a potential issue when you have a joint account with someone other than your spouse.

    Here's one article from Kiplingers that talks about it. https://www.kiplinger.com/article/re...t-in-case.html

    That's seriously just f-ed up. Now I have to figure out how to get my money out of my joint a/c with my mother. FML.

    Leave a comment:


  • disneysteve
    replied
    Originally posted by Scallywag View Post
    I thought this happened only if you recieved "new money" that you did not have access to, previously. For example, our bank a/cs are funded fully by my DH but I am a joint holder in all. If I died, would this trigger "taxes" for him, even though he was funding the a/c with his paycheck? That makes no sense, even if he died first and I was the survivor?
    It's not an issue for spouses since all assets automatically pass to the surviving spouse upon death of the first spouse. Although even with a spouse there can be issues that arise with joint accounts.

    It's more of a potential issue when you have a joint account with someone other than your spouse.

    Here's one article from Kiplingers that talks about it. https://www.kiplinger.com/article/re...t-in-case.html

    Leave a comment:


  • LivingAlmostLarge
    replied
    How does the trusts works exactly? If it is a married couple does it need to be revised upon death of one?

    Leave a comment:


  • Scallywag
    replied
    Originally posted by Like2Plan View Post

    There is another problem with making accounts joint besides what you have already pointed out- it leaves the assets vulnerable to lawsuits (and creditor claims and potential divorce settlements) that the beneficiary might be at risk. And, if it is an asset that would have a capital gain--a beneficiary might miss out on part of the stepped up basis. (It depends on the state--and there are different rules for spouses. But, a non spouse might only get part of the stepped up basis)

    Originally posted by disneysteve View Post

    One problem with making an account joint with your heir has nothing to do with them. Let's say my mom makes me joint owner of her accounts since I'm the only beneficiary. If something then happens to me, she is considered to be inheriting the money from me, when the intent was just the opposite. That could create tax issues for her even though it's really her own money. It could also be a problem if I were to get sued for some reason and they go after those assets.
    Where can I find the law on this?

    I thought this happened only if you recieved "new money" that you did not have access to, previously. For example, our bank a/cs are funded fully by my DH but I am a joint holder in all. If I died, would this trigger "taxes" for him, even though he was funding the a/c with his paycheck? That makes no sense, even if he died first and I was the survivor?

    Similarly, I have a joint a/c from decades ago (when I was a teen) with my mother that I've been contributing to even though I'm not on speaking terms with her. She's obviously older and if she goes first, I end up paying taxes on it? Wow!

    So why would anyone even have joint a/cs if this were the case? What's the point of banks offering them, then?

    Leave a comment:


  • disneysteve
    replied
    Originally posted by corn18 View Post
    she does get her deposit back when she dies. I wonder if she has a beneficiary designated for that?
    Probably not. "Little" things like that are the stuff that complicate settling an estate. For example, I cancelled my cousin's auto insurance, so there was a premium refund. That had to go into the estate account. When I cancel his homeowners policy, the same thing will happen. Even if you have a trust and title all accounts ideally, there will still be unaccounted for money that needs to get handled properly after death. The goal should be to get all of the big stuff nailed down as much as possible.

    Leave a comment:


  • corn18
    replied
    This is a timely thread. My MIL is not doing well. She has my wife set up as a joint owner on her checking and savings accounts. Never thought about the implications of my wife dies first. Will have to think about that.

    she does have a revocable trust and has all her investments in that. Wife is co-executor with her nephew. So that should be fairly straight forward. She doesn’t own a house because she’s in a CCRC but she does get her deposit back when she dies. I wonder if she has a beneficiary designated for that?

    Leave a comment:

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