Relationships

Reduce Costs Of A Divorce Lawyer

November 13, 2006 By Jeffrey Strain 4 Comments

Did you ever hear the expression, “the lawyer who represents himself has a fool for a client?” Divorce is one of those events when you really should hire a lawyer rather than try to do-it-yourself. You can’t possibly be objective in what is probably the most emotional legal battle you will ever face. However, if you believe you can file a “no-fault” divorce and you meet your state residential requirements, you may want to consider some of the comparatively inexpensive documents that are available on-line.

Most divorce attorneys charge you based on the amount of time they spend on your case. Breaking up a marriage stirs up many feelings of anger and sadness, so it’s natural to want to talk to your lawyer about it. Just remember, you may be on the clock while you shout obscenities about your soon-to-be ex-spouse, or wonder out loud where it all went so wrong.

Always keep in mind that your divorce lawyer is your hired gun, not your friend or your therapist. As much as humanly possible, save your emotional talks for your pals (who generally listen for free, or maybe for a round or three of drinks) or a counselor, who probably charges a lot less than your divorce attorney does.

Divorce and custody proceedings can be very expensive. One apt description is to imagine that you and your spouse sell all your assets for cash, then race to the top of a tall building to see who can throw the most money out of the window fastest.

The key to keeping your legal costs down in a divorce and/or custody battle is doing your homework and being organized. Divorce laws vary widely in every state, so your lawyer will tell you specifically what information or documents she needs. Generally, you need to provide lists of your assets and liabilities. Be prepared with the following information, for you and your spouse:

What bank accounts are in your name? Include checking and savings accounts, as well as money market accounts, and investment accounts

What is the current balance of each account?

Do you have 401(k) or other retirement accounts? What is the current balance?

What accounts are in both your names (joint accounts)?

Do you have liabilities such as credit card debt or car loans? How much?

Who owns the house and the car(s)?

Do you have stock options?

What assets did you own before you married?

Are you entitled to receive a pension?

What are your expected Social Security benefits?

Did you sign a prenuptial or ante-nuptial agreement?

Did you receive an inheritance, either before or after you got married?

Did you obtain a degree or professional license during your marriage? In some states, your spouse may be entitled to a portion of your future earnings.

Do you own a business? What is the value of the goodwill?

If you will be seeking alimony or child support, prepare a realistic budget of your expected expenses, rather than just a demand for an unsubstantiated dollar amount.

If you present your lawyer with organized information, it will cut down the amount of time (translation: money) he has to spend asking questions and wading through piles of paper. Your money is better spent getting his advice on how to get the best and quickest settlement possible under the law of your state, rather than adding up numbers or listening while you provide personal information that is not, strictly speaking, relevant to your case.

Courtesy of our manager at inexpensivelawyer.com

When Money Can Buy Happiness

August 9, 2006 By Jeffrey Strain 6 Comments

Can money buy happiness? It would be nice to give a definite “yes” or “no” making the issue black and white instead of shades of gray. The truth is, however, that it really depends on a number of factors on whether money can buy happiness. Still, there are some indicators which point to areas where money can help with happiness.

When it comes to basic living standards, studies show that money has a great influence on happiness. Harvard psychologist Daniel Gilbert, who works on questions such as the relationship between money and happiness, says studies show that all we need for happiness is to have enough money for the basic necessities of life. If we have enough for food, clothing and shelter – which he estimates to be roughly $40,000 a year – we have enough money to be happy.

In this sense, for people living on salaries that don’t meet their basic needs, money can buy happiness. A increase in wealth from $10,000 to $40,000 a year will make a tremendous difference in the quality of their life. Simply stated, money makes a significant contribution in the lives and happiness of people who have little of it.

Once these basic necessities are met, however, money doesn’t seem to help a whole lot when it comes to happiness. After the basic needs are met, the next $50,000, $100,000, $1,000,000 or $10 million has little effect on your happiness.

What the additional money can do is buy time. That is, the more money you have, the less time you have to spend earning it. If you make $50,000 a year but have no savings, you still have to work. If you have $1 million in savings earning 5%, you will earn $50,000 a year from interest giving you the same income with no work. In this instance, you have a choice of how you want to spend your time.

Thus the results of the question of whether money can buy happiness quickly shift from the money itself to how you spend the time which the money allows. If you have a lot of money and are able to spend your time any way you want, you’re not going to be happy if you haven’t developed relationships or activities that make you happy. You will simply spend the time wondering how to spend the time — and why you aren’t happy even though you have money. If it were only money that mattered, a person with $10 million would be 10 times happier than someone with $1 million. We all know that this is not the case.

This is all pretty straightforward and people would be a lot happier knowing these facts about happiness and money. Once having the knowledge, it would seem easy to take the steps necessary to make yourself happier in relation to money except that society throws a curve ball into the equation. While we as individuals want to be happy, society wants us to spend and consume. If our main concern is happiness and we know happiness after a certain income level isn’t dependent on money, this causes a lot of problems for society as a whole. Society therefore has cleverly replaced the truth by suggesting that consumption will bring us happiness.

The societal message is clear in the advertisements you see all around you: the way to be happy is to keep up with the Jones’. Spend money to get the latest and greatest gadget and you will be happy. If it doesn’t make you so, then something else you purchase will surely do so. With all the advertising constantly bombarding you telling you that your happiness is linked to spending more, it’s difficult to step back to find that it just isn’t true.

The challenge is to take this new information and use it to your advantage. Knowing this places you in control to take the steps you need to increase your happiness no matter where your income level falls. Those that aren’t earning enough to meet their basic needs need to concentrate their efforts on earning more money to meet those basic necessities. Those who are earning enough should make sure to take the time to nurture relationships and activities that make them happy and not focus solely on increasing their wealth.

Money & Spouses – What Would You Do?

April 25, 2006 By Jeffrey Strain 10 Comments

money and spouses I’ve been reading a blog where the husband is struggling to keep his wife from spending money they don’t have to spend. It finally got to the point where he is hiding money from his wife.

We have tried the counseling but it usually degenerates into screaming matches. Enough is enough. I don’t care to live in a hovel when I get older so it is up to me to save. I will divorce my finances from my wife’s finances if that is necessary. I thought about it before but it is fast becoming a viable option. I intend to consult a lawyer to see how one goes about doing that…

I printed out info on Debit cards and explained to my wife the dangers of using overdraft protection at 21%. I hope she keeps better control of her checking account. In any case she does not have a credit card and the overdraft is limited to 5000. Crazy stuff this!

More recently he posted that he checked his wife’s purse for new credit cards.

I must be losing it. I snuck into my wife’s purse the other night while she was sleeping and checked for any new credit cards. Thankfully there were none…

I know it sounds crazy but spending is every bit a sickness as alcoholism or gambling or drug addiction. I just need to know that I am not getting blind sided…

There actually is a shopping sickness called Oniomania (Compulsive Shopping Disorder) and it can have devastating effects like any other addiction.

What’s your opinion in this situation? If you were in a similar situation (if it is possible to even imagine), how do you think you’d handle it?

This Site Is More Important Than Sex!!

February 17, 2006 By Jeffrey Strain 5 Comments

Okay, Nate isn’t going to believe it, but you read that correct. I’m sure you unconsciously knew it all the time, but there is a valid reason why you came to this site (and why you should tell all your friends about it!) Who cares if personal finance isn’t sexy? The plain and simple truth is the information contained here is more important than sex when it comes to your relationships. As you can imagine, I’m feeling pretty good about this site at the moment because personal finance types don’t get to make statements like this too often.

I know, I know…you won’t just take my word for it (I wouldn’t either). So I’ll pull out the recent survey commissioned by the Fair Isaac Corp. (of FICO scores fame) that found being financially responsible was more important than sexual compatibility for both men and women when it came to sustaining a relationship.

Being financially responsible, however, doesn’t mean you can be a cheapskate. The survey also found that spending a few dollars unexpectedly can go a long way to making a relationship last. Nearly 7 in 10 (69%) thought purchasing four dozen roses “just because” was considered “wonderfully romantic” while nearly everyone (93%) felt the same way when taken out to a nice meal.

Women were especially concerned about finances saying that financial related topics were the top 2 most important factors for a relationship. These included a steady job and paying the bills on time. A good sense of humor ranked third and getting along with her parents, a desire to have children and a clean driving record rounded out the important issues. For men, a good job and good credit history ranked tied for third behind a good sense of humor and the ability to get along with family members.

So there you have it. The next time you on a hot date with your significant other and want to impress her with your responsibility, if asked if you have protection, be sure that the condom you pull out is of the credit card type.