Do you trust your spouse with money?

2moretrees · #1 (**permalink**) 10-10-2005, 07:40 AM

My friend has a wonderful husband in every way, but according to her he can't be trusted with money. She has to do all the budgeting and keep him on a tight allowance or their finances will be messed up for months. She went away for a week with friends and found that he had spent $700 on tools that she says he'll never use.

I think it's a sad state of affairs and he should have more responsibility. What do you think? Do you trust your spouse / so with money?

jmjj215 · #2 (**permalink**) 10-10-2005, 09:57 AM

I trust her 100%. I trust her more than I trust myself actually

cicy33 · #3 (**permalink**) 10-10-2005, 11:00 AM

I think that there are always going to be people who go nuts and spend spend spend when they get money and if they are truly wise they will admit and allow their spouse to handle the budget. not everyone is money wise. Like this weekend. my dh has $60 to last him all week. and that is fuel, food and cigs. So what does he do Sunday? Asks the boys if they want to go out for breakfast at Pioneer cabin. An easy $20 bill or more. I went to him after they asked me if I was going to and said, do you realize that you have $60 to get you through the week? He says, oh yeah, and takes them to mcdonalds for a pancake. Still spent money but much much less. He only thinks of the present, never considers the future. basically he figures it will work it self out. This drives me NUTS. but we handle it by me handling the finances.

sweeps · #4 (**permalink**) 10-10-2005, 11:02 AM

Same here, my spouse is very responsible with our finances. Both of us were dirt poor for the first 25 years of our lives... We never want to go back to those days.

Gailete · #5 (**permalink**) 10-10-2005, 01:10 PM

I certainly trust my spouse with our money, because he is smart enough to trust me with it! He hates paying bills, etc. and before we were married used to let them just stack up and had to pay late charges and finance charges even when he had the money to pay. I handle the day to day money management, but we discuss any big purchases. Actually anything frivolous over $25 has to be discussed with our spouse prior to spending.

Gail

MrsChambers · #6 (**permalink**) 10-10-2005, 04:45 PM

My husband can't keep money in his pocket.. otherwise he will come home with something totally off the wall or unnecessary.

DivaJen · #7 (**permalink**) 10-10-2005, 04:55 PM

Dh and I trust each other completely with our money. I truly feel grateful that we do - it sounds as though there are too many couples out there that don't. Dh and I have the same goals and touch base regularly to talk about how we're doing financially and what needs to be changed.

Snoopy2645 · #8 (**permalink**) 10-10-2005, 06:35 PM

My dh cant be trusted I have tried & tried with him I was frugal my whole life & he was very poor growing up so he thinks now he needs everything he has admited if he was in charge we would live on the streets & trust me we would.

I have tried to show him how to pay bills & he wont listen I have tried to teach him to budget hes not interested!!! I know if he was single without me & the kids he would be way worse off because he spends money faster than he can get it I keep things tight.

If he didnt have such bad credit he would have more debts than he does now. I just almost feel sorry for him sometimes he dont even know how to pay a bill but he will graduate in DEC with about a 4.0 grade point average he knows everything about electronics & electrical things. But he cant be trusted when it comes to money.

Russell · #9 (**permalink**) 10-10-2005, 07:03 PM

Well, mine's a weird situation. DW is the one that turned me on to savings and ING but now I think its the other way around. I grew up in a family that was well off and hers wasn't.

In anycase, she's not as excited about trying to get financially rich as I am and I may have some part in it though because once I found this site I contantly talked (ok nagged at times) to her about saving and investing money. In the begining she took interest but now she just kinda listens to me but doesn't show any interest

As far as trusting her with money, absolutely. We have joint accounts for everything.

frugalfarmwife · #10 (**permalink**) 10-11-2005, 03:47 AM

In the past hubby could not be trusted at all, money just flew out of his hands, but I knew this when I met him, his finances were in a horrible state but it "wasn't his fault" (Just ask his mom, her kids can do NO WRONG! It's always someone else's fault! Not his fault ever, ever, all her kids are perfect, lol!)

I got his finances all cleaned up and we did well for a long time, but had what ever we wanted and didn't save.

In the last year a LOT has changed, the land in front of us was about to go into bankruptcy and I worked it out to purchase it, with a LOT of stipulations! Pocket money is a thing of the past, 5 bucks better last at least a week, every charge on the gas CC is ONLY gas, dinner out is a thing of the past, lunches are packed daily, lights are turned off when you leave the room.

Am I a miser? You bet I am but he knew how it was going to be if we had to go into debt for the extra land, we both sacrificed a LOT to purchase it but a few years of scraping is more than worth the peace of mind the investment is worth. This land puts our farm up to 82 acres and it is within a mile of town, the closest undeveloped land in an area where good lots are now going for around 10,000 an acre. We don't have children and this land is our retirement.

Some days I hate being the financial adult, but someone has to do it.

Hubby has been doing a wonderful job of changing the attitude from "it'll take care of itself" to "we have to make this work".

KJ

PrincessPerky · #11 (**permalink**) 10-11-2005, 05:49 AM

I trust DH as much as I trust myself, which is to say a lot, but niether of us is perfect. I think he is a bit more relaxed about time than I am, but he is also alot more inventive, and a lot less cranky (pregnant!)

Bruce Wayne · #12 (**permalink**) 10-11-2005, 06:31 AM

I'd trust mine with my money but we're both quite independant so tend to spend what we each earn rather than relying on the others wages to pay for our activities.

Tree0164 · #13 (**permalink**) 10-11-2005, 06:35 AM

Yes I do trust my husband with money. Money can sometimes burn a hole his pocket and doesn't always think that little thing add up-that is really our only thing we don't see eye to eye on.

He won't go out and spend a $100 just for the heck of it.

tomkat · #14 (**permalink**) 10-11-2005, 12:06 PM

Yes, I trust my husband with money, more than I trust myself! He's a saver, and I'm a spender. My weakness is clothes

. I don't make big purchases, just little small purchases...you know, $20 here, $25 there...it adds up, though!

BAGAGT1 · #15 (**permalink**) 10-11-2005, 08:06 PM

Wholeheartedly. We don't always see eye to eye on the finances, but I never have to worry about her making any rash purchases.

robex · #16 (**permalink**) 10-12-2005, 08:45 AM

Yes, I do trust him. I generally handle our finances, but he doesn't make rash purchases. He's always been responsible, and although he may not be the saver that I am, he's never spent more than he/we can afford. Not having debt is a huge priority with him and our bills have never gone unpaid.

SMB · #17 (**permalink**) 10-12-2005, 09:59 AM

He trusts me, I trust him. I think I'm more frugal than him, though, and more likely to research purchases, banks, etc.--sometimes to the point of being annoying, I'm sure.

Armywife · #18 (**permalink**) 10-12-2005, 12:17 PM

I love him dearly but DH likes spending frivolously. Fortunately, I overstate expenses to cover his spending every month lol...

genchan · #19 (**permalink**) 10-13-2005, 04:07 PM

Yes, I believe that we trust each other unless there is something she is hiding from me that I don't know about

BillsGirl · #20 (**permalink**) 10-14-2005, 05:43 PM

My husband controls the finances 100% around here, My name isn't even on the bank account and it's probably for good reason, I know I stink when it comes to money thats why I let him have control.... don't get me wrong if I really want something I ask and I get it.. but if I had control I would buy every stupid frivalous thing i saw!!