Toss good money after bad?

[FrugalFish]

You sound frustrated. It sounds like your DH is being a little selfish at the moment. When my DH use to do anything like that, I'd pull out the Mr. Spock quote about the needs of the many outweighing the needs of the one...

Have you tried to fit a rear facing child seat in your corolla? Especially when babies are little, those seats have to recline a little more and they take up a lot of room front to back. Installing a car seat gave my DH pause for thought- he was really frustrated with the room it took in our small car. The front seat had to be all the way forward for better than a year, until DD was big enough to face forward. We were not in the market for a car at that time, but had we been, the car seat issue would have had significant bearing on what we decided to do.

Goodness, if you do end up having twins, or another kid sooner than later, and one of you is taller than 5ft, it might not be possible to fit everyone into a smaller car. Definitely not the dogs. Even in our doable situation, I felt like I spent the first year sitting against the windshield and did not like it one bit. If we traveled much, it would have been a no go. DH is only average in height and he could not fit in the seat when it was as far forward as need be to accommodate the seat behind.

If you're in the market to buy your next car, I think it's very reasonable for the coming baby to be a major factor in deciding what to purchase. DH needs to get over himself and accept that he may have to drive an unfun car for a couple of years- hopefully he won't care once he sees that little face.

[LivingAlmostLarge]

Thanks, I think I may have to play the spock quote sooner rather than later.

We'd previously decided that we would wait until the baby came to make a decision. It was too intangible, too many risks that we could possibly not have a baby due to many reasons.

It's still hard to argue because I'm not having a normal pregnancy. I'm not sick, no weight gain, my pants are finally getting tight, and I still haven't felt movement at 5 months. I know this is wearing on my mental psyche and my DH's. It doesn't quite feel real yet to either of us, so it's hard for us to even buy anything for the baby. Used stuff okay, but something new from the store?

No way. We can't even bring ourselves to buy a new blanket or clothes. We put down a toy we really wanted because we feel like we're jinxing ourselves.

And the carseat fits in the Corolla, but it's tight, hence the need for a bigger car for sure. But since we haven't bought the seat, or know what we're buying, my DH feels we should just pick a car. I can't blame him, but then we can't settle on type of seat yet because we're still trying to wrap our heads around the baby yet.

It goes against all logic. You should be feeling moving, having morning sickness, being tired, getting fat, showing a belly, slowing down, etc. I haven't done that so it feels like a normal fall. It's surreal.

[KTP]

Originally Posted by wincrasher

Then then there are safety features. Airbags are great, but cars are proven to be safer in accidents than SUV's and minivans. I love my Honda Odyssey for it's utility, but I know that my Hyundai sedan would be much safer in an accident.

Trucks are far safer than cars though. Every accident between truck vs car you hear about the truck driver escaped with minor cuts and the car driver is dead or critical condition.

I guess there is something to be said about having a huge chunk of iron and metal between you and the other car.

Now semi trucks, there is your safe vehicle. They can smash through anything and get out unscathed. A bit hard to park in the city though...

[wincrasher]

That is not true.

Studies have shown that vehicles with disparate bumper heights, the higher usually being a truck or SUV, the higher bumpered vehicle will cause more damage to the lower car.

In all the other scenarios, the SUVs, vans and trucks folded up rather easily. The newer models now have bars in the doors and such to protect the occupants in side impacts. Cars have much better side protection and are required to have better roll-over protection too. Their low center of gravities also make them less likely to roll as well - which is a big killer.

[autoxer]

Originally Posted by LivingAlmostLarge

I made my DH the offer of driving the corolla and I get the baby mobile. Trust me I want a minivan. He made a HUGE face when I suggested a minivan. Said no.

Said no to driving my corolla because it's not FUN. He wants to like what he drives.

So I keep digging my heels in and refusing to buy a newer stupid car that I think is dumb because he refuses to buy a car I think is practical.

And yep, we have two dogs. I'd be happy with a Toyota Camry actually, I think a full size sedan would be perfect compromise. NOT an SUV or minivan, but the perfect step up to a minivan.

And he won't do Kias or Hyundais. He's very biased and he doesn't really want an American car either, not that I can blame him after our experiences.

I guess I have a lot in common with your husband, because I don't like driving my wife's corolla. I also don't like minivans, or kias. And I certainly won't spend lots of money on a car that I don't like.

I don't see the problem with the Toyota Matrix. It has just as many seats as the corolla or the camry, but a lot more cargo volume than either one. The Camry may be 2" wider and 17" longer, but that doesn't make it any more practical than a Matrix. The Matrix also has more headroom than the Camry. The only thing the Camry has more of is rear hip room.
Toyota Side-by-Side Comparison

Have you gone to a dealer to sit in one to see how 'subcompact' it actually is?

[LivingAlmostLarge]

Yep, and I like 4 the bigger back seat. More space is lovely. I prefer a minivan but I'll wait on that.

[zetta]

It's still hard to argue because I'm not having a normal pregnancy. I'm not sick, no weight gain, my pants are finally getting tight, and I still haven't felt movement at 5 months. I know this is wearing on my mental psyche and my DH's. It doesn't quite feel real yet to either of us, so it's hard for us to even buy anything for the baby. Used stuff okay, but something new from the store?

You're about 20 weeks? Hang in there -- you should be having an ultrasound soon, and seeing that baby on the screen will make a big difference. It's not that unusual to not have morning sickness (I didn't even with twins), and if the placenta has an anterior attachment it's quite common not to feel movement yet. With our first we didn't buy a thing until an ultrasound at 22 weeks showed everything to be ok.

If you go to Babies R Us, they might let you try some of their floor models in your car just to get an idea of the fit.

[LivingAlmostLarge]

Got my u/s on Friday, it's a GIRL! Excited.

Anterior placenta and tilted uterus means the baby isn't likely to show or move until another 4 weeks.

[simpletron]

Have you thought about a mazda 5? someone at my office recently got one and it looks like a minivan trying to be a car or a car trying to be minivan. it is much bigger than car but also much smaller than a full-size minivan. it has seats for six but doesn't really have the necessary cargo room for six. it looks a lot like a hatchback, but has sliding doors like a van. it is a weird car from my point of view, but seems to be the car that would be a compromise between your wants and his.

[LivingAlmostLarge]

I believe we'll be looking soon because today we got a free infant car seat and stroller combo from a coworker. Well I'll get it at the end of the month.

At that time, we'll have the real deal to try in every car/hatch/van we try. We can see truck size. We can see what we really need/want.

[tripods68]

I'm sorry, FORD FOCUS is a PIECE OF CRAP. That's how I feel about it since I owed one before. Now I drive only japanese cars (owed Honda and Altima). I agree with your husband don't fix it. Put it on Craigslist or sell the parts junkyard.

ANy japanese car is an upgrade from Ford Focus. You should look at the new Camry, Accord, or Altima around $14K to 16K used.

Personally, I like the newer car like the new Altima, Camry LE, Accord, Mazda6 which are great for family car sedan starting low $18 to 21K range.

[MonkeyMama]

Congrats on the girl!

Another car to look at is the Pontiac Vibe. The inside is all "Toyota."

I didn't realize before that it was the "same" as the Matrix. I thought the Matrix was much smaller. I just had to add that the Matrix/Vibe is a decent sized car. Maybe good for some middle ground. I think it would be good to make you both happy. My in-laws always buy the Toyotas' "American twins" and they have a Vibe.

You won't know until you car shop anyway. My dh's Ford is teeny tiny on the outside, but far more storage space and room than you would ever imagine. The small cars are hard to pin down until you ride in them and fill them with crap.

I still think what you want/need will change when the baby arrives. I still wouldn't rush it just for that reason.

[LivingAlmostLarge]

Mazda5, might be out of our price range unless used! If my DH would consider used we could be doing better.

Please tell me I'm not crazy for trying to stick to a cash budget. I know one other reason we're not buying a car, beside deciding, is we have a pretty rigid cash budget. $15k. If we can't buy it for less than we're not buying it.

If we wait longer, we have more time to save obviously. I know it sounds stupid, but I'm not sure I am really comfortable with car loans right now.

[tripods68]

You live in the cold weather with ice and snow, i would seriously think about driving an AWD like a Subaru Legacy family sedan.

Just my 2 cents.

[LivingAlmostLarge]

Nope, my DH won't do it. Refuses AWD, thinks it's stupid. You don't need it. He grew up in the great white north without it, doesn't like the gas mileage and repairs. I suggested subie legacy, no go.

[LivingAlmostLarge]

I should do a quick update, that my DH is changing his mind at a rapid pace.

I may have a car I want sooner rather than later.

He didn't want anyone to help us with the baby, that changed this week after we went to childbirth class. He wanted to formula feed the baby so he could help instead of breastfeeding, that changed as well after birth class and will change probably more after we go to lactation class.

We also got our infant seat and boy is it tight in both our cars! Yikes. Plus the dogs need to be trained to not jump around.

So the car issue is now going my way. He is now agreeing it's stupid to buy another car that is the same size as our cars, when the stupid infant seat is pushing both front seats up when it's rear facing in the middle.

We have a maxi cosi infant seat and will also be using a Graco infant seat. Then changing to a Britax convertible.

Sigh, I love getting all this stuff and my DH changing his mind without me arguing.

[FrugalFish]

Glad to hear an update and that DH is becoming more reasonable. I loved watching the baby become real to my DH, it was very sweet.

Sounds like you have a good guy there.

[disneysteve]

Thanks for the update. I had a feeling that once he was confronted with reality, he would change his mind. Some people need the hands on, visual demonstration rather than just the verbal explanation.

[LivingAlmostLarge]

Frugalfish and DS, exactly. It wasn't until he installed our car seat and folded the stroller that suddenly OMG, HOLY COW the SIZE! The size everyone else bitches about became real.

We test drove it and I had to push the seats foward. I'm not too tall so it was fine, but my DH is leggy, while not exceptionally tall.

Plus we know that an accord even is a tight fit. Our neighbors (knock on wood) due today installed their Britax Roundabout. It didn't fit in their Civic Hybrid, and is tight in the accord when rear facing. He helped them install it so it was just becoming more spatially real.

So I figure next fall we'll get a car when we determine when to have our second kid, the dogs, and baby situation and car seats.

Plus by not rushing out and buying a car that didn't fit, we just saved a year of college savings for our little one. Now we can buy one car instead of buying and selling and dealing with transactional costs of cars.