$170 investment

[LivingAlmostLarge]

My DH whined incessantly about getting a new car. Basically he wanted to replace his car a 2000 Ford Focus witha newer model. It has bothered the heck out of me.

I have no desire to replace our cars with the SAME thing when we are planning kids. Stupid. Plus we don't want to be the dummies who buy a new car and then sell it 6 months later after you can't stick a baby seat in a 2 door sports car...hmmm funny it didn't fit.

Anyway, I convinced my DH to install a new stereo over Black Friday deals for $170. It has an Ipod adapter which he has been whining about as a reason for getting a new car. "Oh it has a better stereo." Whine, whine, whine.

Do you ever do this? Spend stupid money on something dumb just because it will make you keep something longer? Like a couch cover because you are tired of your couch, but it's still good? Or a new car stereo when the factory is fine?

I figure we'll keep the car only another 12 months, then replace it, so I'm a bit irked that we spent the money. But I couldn't take the whining anymore.

What do you think, a fair compromise? I know he also whines because of JERKS at work have actually said to him "You drive that?" WTF. So he's been embarrassed by the car. But come on! It was brand new when he bought it and if he didn't want to be embarrassed he should have bought a civic or corolla sedan.

Plus screw what others thinks. As you can see I have no shame. I wear a full length down coat to my ankles. I'm sure I look stupid walking to the bus and around work. But people can go think what they will, I'm warm and happy.

[maat55]

There's a difference in the thought process of a person acceptable to instant gratification and an onfire saver. Years ago, I would have felt just like your husband, today, I want to be one of those guy's who looks nothing like a millionaire, but is.

[Ima saver]

Living almost large, I dress in jeans and shirts from Wal Mart's. As long as they are clean, that is fine with me.

[disneysteve]

LAL, I drive a 1998 Camry with 113,000 miles. It is looking pretty run-down but it drives fine and I don't plan to replace it until I have to for mechanical reasons, not cosmetic ones.

I see nothing wrong with spending a reasonable amount of money to extend the life of a more costly item, like the new stereo or sofa cover. Makes a lot more sense than totally replacing the item.

I'm also one who doesn't much care what others think. Others aren't paying my bills or going to support me in retirement so I do what I feel I need to do. If others don't like it, oh well, they don't have to do it.

[LivingAlmostLarge]

The problem partially is having new friends. We've been scientists. But now with the MBA we're meeting a different type of people. People who actually care and give a damn what they look like and appear as.

[disneysteve]

Originally Posted by LivingAlmostLarge

The problem partially is having new friends. We've been scientists. But now with the MBA we're meeting a different type of people. People who actually care and give a damn what they look like and appear as.

Interesting point. Peer pressure isn't just for teens.

I'm a physician. Outside of work, my wife and I have exactly ZERO friends who are physicians. Why? Because physicians generally lead an upscale lifestyle, or at least more upscale than we choose to live. So I understand how hanging out with a different demographic could make him feel like he needs to upgrade things. The answer is either be happy with what you've got or stop hanging out with those people.

[m3racer]

Originally Posted by LivingAlmostLarge

The problem partially is having new friends. We've been scientists. But now with the MBA we're meeting a different type of people. People who actually care and give a damn what they look like and appear as.

There is nothing wrong with caring about how you look. Image may not be everything but it is pretty darn important. With that being said, you don't have to spend an arm and a leg to look professional and upscale.

[m3racer]

Maybe next time he should buy a car that he truly likes. That way he can hold onto it much longer. I think a lot of people buy cars that they are not completely satisfied with for whatever reason. It might make more sense to spend a little more $$ upfront and get a car that he'll baby for many years.

[Joan.of.the.Arch]

I think that you made an excellent compromise. And heck, yeah, I "fix things up" to extend their life....Haven't I read that Warren Buffet drives a 1975 Nova, or something like that? Maybe you can Google that and have hubby ready to humorously respond with that inspirational tidbit when people seem to judge hm poorly for the car he drives as an MBA.

Hey, when our child was born, it did not even occur to us that a baby car seat would not fit into our two door Toyota Tercel. Of course, it fit. It may have been a little more trouble than putting it in and out of a four-door, but so what? Big deal. I know some parents have gone immediately to a mini-van as soon as they were expecting their first, and that car seat issue was the justification. But with a mini-van, one has to climb all the way in and out of the car to secure the seat in the middle seat, which one does not have to do with a little car. You just lean in. Which is really easier?

[snafu]

While caring about appearance [to some extent] shows you value yourself I don't think it relates to your car unless it's a rusted-out beater, one day away from junk. As an MBA he is an experienced researcher so he might spend time researching the trends and figure out what the best vehicle might be for your future.

Plan to transfer the new stereo to the next car and it won't feel like a waste of $170.

[Bimmer]

If you're planning to sell the car soon, then it is a waste. However, if a $170 investment will help make your husband's commute more enjoyable and make him want to keep the car for a couple more years, I see no problem with that (as long as you can afford it). I also feel that since a car is place where a lot of time is spent (it is for me anyways), why not make it a bit more comfortable/enjoyable?

It is like I have seen on this board: It is OK to spend some money every now and then. I am learning that it is wise to save and spend carefully, but if you tighten up too much you will go crazy.

[LivingAlmostLarge]

You haven't meet academic science people have you? They are pretty um, well not exactly presentable most. So we haven't had to work at looking good. We do. MBA are a totally different ballgame. And you can't tell me not. I've seen both.

My DH has worked for a nobel laureate and he drives a honda civic hatchback. He's not unusual. Warren Buffet's cheapness is unique amongst wealthy business men. More professors look like bums than you can imagine. So there is a very different mindset and culture.

He bought this car and he loved it. It was his first and only car and he saved a long time for it.

A 4 door minivan, you can stick a baby in the second row. Like a sedan you can attach it to the side seat. By the way I have a 4 door corolla and a car seat will fit just fine for us.

BUT we're not my roomie who at almost 6'4 barely fits in our cars. No way to fit a baby if he marries a tall women. Actually it's physcially uncomfortable for him to drive my car because the seat doesn't go back far enough for his legs. Not us but for some, small cars won't work. I realized when he started riding with us and looked like his likes just bunched up in the cars.

I don't know, but I'd like to keep the car until 2010. Have a baby 2009 and a new car the year after we figure out what we really need and want.

[Christophercarl]

I agree that there is nothing wrong with spending a little more money to extend the life of a more expensive item. It's hard to change how people think though, and if he feels uncomfortable driving the car, it's something psychological that only HE can change. If he doesn't see the problem with spending the money to make himself feel better, then it may always be a struggle between you guys when it comes to financial matters.

Just try to be creative in finding ways to change his way of thinking. It will be hard, but if you can overcome it you will be much happier and will obtain financial freedom much sooner.

[MonkeyMama]

I understand why 4 doors if nice with a baby - but I agree with Joan. People get pregnant and they buy a SUV or a minivan - which really makes little sense. (When you have 3 kids+ you have little choice, on the other hand, with carseat laws).

I am sure a carseat would fit in there fine. Not a giant carseat. But there are plenty of decent carseats that fit in subcompact cars.

(We have a 2001 Ford Escort).

Along the same lines, I had to say are people putting down the age of the car, or just the car? (Again, I say this as someone with a very similar car). We've had a lot of insults about the brand and the size. So I am not sure if going newer will help much in that regard.

Our car does have 4 doors though, which I Admit is nice with carseats. I will give you that. But again, it's just a luxury - not a necessity. If he likes the Focus, I say let him keep it. Is he going to work? When we had our first child I had a convertible - which would not fit a carseat - any carseat. I drove it 6 months before I gave it up - my spouse stayed home and I just never had to drive the kids anywhere. Now we have a minivan too but I love having both extremes - a subcompact and a minivan. They both are useful to have. Just another angle. IF we had 2 kids and just our subcompact and smaller sedan, I'd have no beef. We don't tend to go BIG with everything though. We always had a modest stroller and stuff like that. We tend to use the subcompact for road trips too, now that the kids have graduated from their bulkier baby carseats. Better mileage. I can see that changing when they are much bigger. But they are so little now the car is plenty comfortable for us. We never much got the "bigger is better" thing.

[LivingAlmostLarge]

Size, type, style (hatchback) of car. It is an older car, and it will definitely go. Our 4 door corolla is perfect for kids. It's spacious enouhg for us.

He doesn't want the focus, but the $170 stereo might have bought me a while longer before he wants a newer, nicer car.

I'd like a station wagon personally. I figure we'll keep our two dogs and likely add a bigger dog when the older one (he's 13) dies. I think an old english bulldog instead of a bichon. So we'll need space and I want 4 kids, but we've settled on trying 2.

I like practical cars. Something a bit bigger, like an accord or camry would not be awful. It would be doable for a bit, but I'd prefer a outback or different station wagon.

[scfr]

If image is important in his job, would switching cars help? Let him drive the Corolla and you drive the Focus?

For what it's worth, we personally know several successful business owners who drive cars that are pretty much beaters ... Once you reach a certain level of success, you don't have to give a you-know-what what others think of you. Our former next door neighbor owned a nice internet business, and he drove a Ford Focus. Not because that was all he could afford, but because he was smart enough not to throw his money away on a depreciating asset, and since he owned the company there was no one to look down on him.

[Tree0164]

Even if you replace the car in a year it is only a $15 a month cost for the stereo adapter. That is better than a $250-$300 monthly car payment.

As far of the image thing, I really don't give a rat's you know what. Both my husband and I drive older cars. I buy clothes on sale and clearance and we look decent.

[FrugalFish]

My DH has worked in many jobs, in several fields, and it's always interesting in which ones people are concerned with image, and which ones you find the frugalites.

The most image conscious jobs he's been at have all been the lowest paying- is that strange? These were the jobs where everyone had to drive a new car, wore designer clothes, and went out to dinner as a group a couple times a week. The eating out was the thing that bugged me. It gets expensive, but it's a social investment; if you don't go with the group off work, you aren't really part of the group at work. You don't advance without belonging, so I understand the pressure and that it can have some impact on work performance.

[noppenbd]

Originally Posted by LivingAlmostLarge

Do you ever do this? Spend stupid money on something dumb just because it will make you keep something longer? Like a couch cover because you are tired of your couch, but it's still good? Or a new car stereo when the factory is fine?

I figure we'll keep the car only another 12 months, then replace it, so I'm a bit irked that we spent the money. But I couldn't take the whining anymore.

What do you think, a fair compromise?

I think it was a great investment if it really makes him happy enough to keep the car for another year. In a similar vein, we like to have our cars detailed from time to time since it gives them that "new" feeling and lets us keep them that much longer. Also, this summer I bought a bunch of replacement parts for my grill so I can keep it a few more years. Probably didn't need to replace every piece that I bought but it satisfies my urge to spend a bit.

[LivingAlmostLarge]

Definitely about the eating out. I think part of the porblem is he views cars as liquid investments. That he doesn't care if it's a bad investment, he just sort of likes it.

Example, we were watching football, and there was an ad for LEASING a VW for $260/month. He got very excited and said he could do that. I reminded him that we just got him a new car stereo.

His rebuttal is that leasing a car for what his car is worth say 3 years at $250/month would be great. That way if we have kids and the car doesn't fit our lifestyle just trade it in and get a new car. Arrrgh.

Why can't he just wait and let it go? Figure out what we need and then get something at that point in time. I'm not against a new car, yes not even a used car, but I just want to wait and see what we need.

We might have 2 parents living with us watching our child. In which case I want a minivan with 4 adults, one baby, and 2 dogs full time +/- extra people. I think it's reasonable.