Family of 5 trying to make it on $160k/yr in MA

[Well Spent]

Young couple grapples with budget predicament - The Boston Globe

[Inkstain82]

Simple fact that we come to face with time and again:

Above the line where you can meet all of a family's basic needs (different for all areas, but roughly somewhere between $30k and $50k/year), everyone faces the same financial problems and solutions. Making $60k/year doesn't "feel" any different from making $260k/year. (not that I wouldn't like to try it)

[davrobins]

Agreed. Different fammilies have different ways of living.

If the family is happy, its all that matters.

[feh]

My take - given that their housing expenses aren't terribly high ($1400/month), these people have a serious spending problem.

[disneysteve]

I've said many times that financial problems don't disappear when your income rises. If you don't have a handle on your spending, you could be earning a million dollars and still be in trouble.

And I'm sure 160K for a family of 5 doesn't go all that far in Boston.

[red92s]

As a casual observation, if they didn't drop $9k a year on private high school, they could build a suitable emergency fund pretty rapidly.

I went to college at a highly-regarded public school. Many of my friends went to private high schools. Many ended up paying significantly more for their high school education than they did for their college education. MANY were steered towards public colleges since mom and dad were already fronting $20k a year in high school tuiton for younger siblings. My girlfriend attended college for FIVE YEARS at roughly the same tuition cost of ONE year at her high school.


But hey, they think it's a necessity, and are willing to foot the bill for it. Just don't complain when you are still broke.

Originally Posted by disneysteve

And I'm sure 160K for a family of 5 doesn't go all that far in Boston.

Beyond housing costs, which seem reasonable ($1400) in their case, what would make Boston any worse than most major metro areas? Health Insurance is mandatory I guess. Toll roads? Parking downtown? Gas prices here are not sky high, there is a great public transport system. I guess with the housing part removed I don't see how it would be substantially worse than say, Atlanta, Chicago, Miami, etc.

[disneysteve]

Originally Posted by red92s

I don't see how it would be substantially worse than say, Atlanta, Chicago, Miami, etc.

No, probably not worse than any other big city.

[LivingAlmostLarge]

They don't live in boston if they are paying $1400/month! They live outside, I believe specifically down south at least 30-60 minutes out of the city.

You can barely rent a studio in boston for $1400.

[Goldy1]

I have a degree in education althoug hnot using my degree currently. WHile I certainly understand and respect a parent's decision to send a child to private school for the religious emersion and education, I am a fan of good public schools. Both hire high quality good teachers. In fact, there is less turn over in public school due to being able to get tenure and being paid better etc.
I have seen parents struggle to send little Johnny to private school while in my opinion, the money could be put to a college fund and he could attend a religion class.
But if you can afford it, great, fine. I just hate hearing parents talk about how the teachers are superior while they get character education in public schools.

[wincrasher]

This will get me flammed, but...

My opinion is that private school is just an extension of people's racism.

Especially here in the south, people send their kids to private school primarily because they don't want their kids to attend with all the students of color. Of course no one would ever admit that.

There are alot around here that homeschool for the same reasons and don't have to pay tuition.

Many of these schools are religious based, which seems hypocritical to me.

To boot, the teachers make less money than public school, the curriculum is restricted by religious dogma and there are fewer resources for science, art, etc. So it's not a better education.

[red92s]

Originally Posted by wincrasher

there are fewer resources for science, art, etc. So it's not a better education.

Most of the expensive private schools we traveled to for athletic events had incredible campuses. One had a computer center the size of our library.

[kork13]

Originally Posted by red92s

Most of the expensive private schools we traveled to for athletic events had incredible campuses. One had a computer center the size of our library.

Agreed, a close friend of mine went K-12 to a private school in Atlanta, and it was incredible... beautiful campus, excellent basic science, music, and arts programs, and overall an outstanding curriculum. His parents sent him there (at considerable cost) because a) it provides a top-tier education; and b) it's 100x safer than Atlanta's public schools. Bars and security guards? Yea, no thanks.

I think the difference may be in the level of the private school.... An expensive, selective private school (like my friend went to) really just can't be compared to public schools. They have the money to be superior, and they are. However, I think many of the less-financially-endowed private schools really can suffer from some of the ailments wincrasher mentioned, particularly the narrowness of the curriculum. While some inner-racism may be a factor, very seldom would that be the deciding factor.

[disneysteve]

Originally Posted by wincrasher

My opinion is that private school is just an extension of people's racism.

Especially here in the south, people send their kids to private school primarily because they don't want their kids to attend with all the students of color. Of course no one would ever admit that.

This is exactly why we did not send our daughter to private school. My wife was interested in sending her to a Jewish day school. I was adamantly opposed. As much as our religion is important to us, I wanted DD to be exposed to all types of people, not just those who are like us. You can't learn tolerance and acceptance when everybody around you looks and thinks the same way you do. I wanted her to see kids of different races, religions, nationalities and socio-economic status. The place to do that is public school.

[feh]

I don't have any studies to reference, but I've read that on average, teachers at public schools are superior to those at private schools. Teachers at private schools are generally paid less and aren't necessarily accredited.

[tripods68]

Originally Posted by wincrasher

This will get me flammed, but...
My opinion is that private school is just an extension of people's racism.

I take offense on this ignorant comment. We don't live in the south either. Maybe you should learn other culture first before SPEWING your own GARBAGE. How about try to learn other parts of the world/cultures of less fortunate countries like in the South East Asia (third world countries like the Philippines or Indonesia), where majority of public schools system are substandard, inadequate, hardly comparable to US public system. In these countries, only private schools are "most" preferred. Parents there work triple jobs to afford private schooling. That's how my parents tried to put us through, growing up in the Philippines.

When we moved to the US, my sister and I spent the rest of our schooling in the public setting (middle through high school). Certainly one that I have great deal of fond memories.

Now that I am married we want our kids to experience what my parents couldn't afford to do with us. At early on, DW and I made a commitment to send our two kids to Catholic school. DW and I catholics and we want our children to have a deeper understanding and appreciation of god. Our whole finances are geared towards supporting that commitment. Both of our children go to Catholic school today. And by the way, this school is heavily geared towards math and science, not just religion.

It isn't set in stone, of course, our situation could change at any time. But as long our budget allows it and our kids continue to enjoy their school, they will stay in that setting. While at the same time, we won't hesitate to send our kids to public school either.

Do you still think we are racist for sending our kids to private school?

[mom-from-missouri]

It depends on the schools where you live. Kansas City mo schools are so bad they have LOST part of their funding and are no longer accreditated. The public schools in our little town of less than 3000 have a 18% preg rate in the MIDDLE SCHOOL!!!, and an average of 4 drug arrests in the school PER MONTH. They do have some great teachers, but 3 great teachers cant control the bad teachers and 1800 out of control students (in the district as a total). Not to mention being on the KC and ST Jo news for fighting, race fights and drug sales
We homeschool. I don't want my kids around those kids. If I could pick and choose who they would be exposed to I would send them. But, that isn't an option.

[LivingAlmostLarge]

Depends on where you live. Some private schools are so exorbitant that they are superior to public schools when they cost as much as universities!

[disneysteve]

Originally Posted by mom-from-missouri

It depends on the schools where you live.

Exactly. I work in one of the poorest cities in the country. The public schools are terrible - high crime, high absenteeism, high drug use, etc. Any parents who are able send their kids to private school. It isn't a racial issue at all. It isn't a religious issue at all. The public schools are all African American and Hispanic. The private schools are all African American and Hispanic. The private schools are not religious in nature. It is mostly charter schools. It is totally about putting the kids in a safe environment where they will actually get an education.

[RedThunderBird]

Originally Posted by tripods68

I take offense on this ignorant comment. We don't live in the south either. Maybe you should learn other culture first before SPEWING your own GARBAGE. How about try to learn other parts of the world/cultures of less fortunate countries like in the South East Asia (third world countries like the Philippines or Indonesia), where majority of public schools system are substandard, inadequate, hardly comparable to US public system. In these countries, only private schools are "most" preferred. Parents there work triple jobs to afford private schooling. That's how my parents tried to put us through, growing up in the Philippines.

When we moved to the US, my sister and I spent the rest of our schooling in the public setting (middle through high school). Certainly one that I have great deal of fond memories.

Now that I am married we want our kids to experience what my parents couldn't afford to do with us. At early on, DW and I made a commitment to send our two kids to Catholic school. DW and I catholics and we want our children to have a deeper understanding and appreciation of god. Our whole finances are geared towards supporting that commitment. Both of our children go to Catholic school today. And by the way, this school is heavily geared towards math and science, not just religion.

It isn't set in stone, of course, our situation could change at any time. But as long our budget allows it and our kids continue to enjoy their school, they will stay in that setting. While at the same time, we won't hesitate to send our kids to public school either.

Do you still think we are racist for sending our kids to private school?

I agree with you totally ------

[RedThunderBird]

Originally Posted by wincrasher

This will get me flammed, but...

My opinion is that private school is just an extension of people's racism.

Especially here in the south, people send their kids to private school primarily because they don't want their kids to attend with all the students of color. Of course no one would ever admit that.

There are alot around here that homeschool for the same reasons and don't have to pay tuition.

Many of these schools are religious based, which seems hypocritical to me.

To boot, the teachers make less money than public school, the curriculum is restricted by religious dogma and there are fewer resources for science, art, etc. So it's not a better education.

people are entitled to their opinions --- but not the facts , and your post offends me greatly ----- I live in the famous south , and I glad that my father put me trough a private school --- he was a hard working man , without much schooling ---- but he worked hard , and in the process sent me to a private school --- back them the public school system barely worked --- today it does not exist -- but I believe you know this , and if you don't you should - there are so many things I could tell you --- but I know you don't care about the truth ----- what you have said is shameful ----- but that is a trip I would not ride with you or any one ---- I lived in many countries ---- never knew racism until I first came to this country -- it was idiotic , and I knew that it will fall --- like all idiotic ideas - and it did== I am glad of it , but guilt trips no more --- only for those who feel guilty , I never did ; so what you are saying is racist , and it is shameful