What is the costs of kids?

[questions]

I just learned that my wife is pregnant with our first child and while I'm thrilled, I am also the one that does the budgeting and I am trying to run the numbers. The issue is that i have no idea what costs I am going to be facing. I'm hoping that you can provide me with some first hand knowledge of what the costs i should expect for the first few years will be and some hints on how to keep costs down that maybe a first time parent wouldn't know about.

I know the generic answer is going to be "a lot" but any hard estimates would be appreciated that I could plug into the budget. Also a list of all the items that I will need that I don't have so I make sure I'm not missing any. Any and all help is greatly appreciated.

[disneysteve]

A baby needs food, clothing, shelter and lots of love. Beyond that, everything else is a luxury. Keep that in mind as you move forward, and congratulations by the way. Don't let anyone talk you into the $800 stroller, solid maple high chair or hypoallergenic, antibacterial microfiber shopping cart seat liner.

You are entering the best possible time of year to be preparing for a new baby - yard sale season. Most items get resold for pennies on the dollar - about 10% of original value is typical. So plan out some Saturday mornings to stock up on everything that you want and save yourself a small fortune. That's what we did and best of all, when we were done with the items, we resold them at our own yard sale, generally for the same price we had paid and sometimes even a little more. That greatly defrayed the costs of those first couple of years.

[MonkeyMama]

There isn't much a new baby really *needs* but diaper and formula. Be discerning in what you buy - don't buy every baby gadget just because your friends have them. I think the only thing we really splurged on was a proper/safe/top notch carseat. For just about every other baby item we bought used and sold for the same price when we were done. (Basically a free rental!). Not a lot of baby expenses. We did buy a new crib which was used for about 4 years (2 kids) and eventually sold. We didn't buy any other baby-specific furniture. Felt most of it was a waste. I am not a yardsale person, but you get the same results with ebay and Craigslist. One thing I never really understood was the cadiallac type strollers/carseat systems everyone hseems to have. I liked something smaller and easier to carry around, myself. I rebelled against the "bigger is better" mentality of the last decade.

Many people here will underplay the expense of kids. Most of us agree that a lot of the stuff people spend money on early on is just silly. Even to the extent of "needing a bigger place to live." Babies don't take up much space.

That said, don't underscore the potential financial hardships children bring. Lost income or daycare - either is VERY expensive. Medical bills are often a biggie for people. We have healthy children and didn't pay much for maternity/delivery, but our health insurance cost 10 times what it did when we first had kids. (Mostly because I now cover 4 people insetad of just myself. Rising costs of health insurance is a doozie, too).

I did breastfeed my kids primarily, but don't fool yourself. A nursing mom needs to eat a lot of food to nourish her kids. Nursing is not really free. Likewise, my children, since toddlerhood, have mostly eaten like full grown adults. They are almost 6 and 8 now. Early on we spent a lot of money on diapers and daycare (help since no family here - just part-time daycare) while losing substantial income. These days, the big expenses are feeding them. Don't really spend a whole lot on clothing and toys. But food and medical insurance would be the expensive part these days. I Still question how profitable 2 incomes would be with daycare, at this age. Even though daycare is significantly cheaper now than it was at the baby stage.

Anyway, everyone's expenses will be unique based on their situation. I don't think you will get a good solid answer about how much baby cost. But you will get ideas to keep costs down, here., and things to think about.

[Redraidernurse]

Tips on saving money:

Your wife breastfeeds the child for the first year of its life. MUCH better for your child and your wife and less expensive.Token Fat White Chick: Facts About Breastfeeding
You use cloth diapers instead of disposable.
You resist buying brand new baby items (clothes, high chair, etc) - shop on craigslist, consignment shops, garage sales.
Ask yourself if when you are buying a baby item if the baby really NEEDS this or is it a luxury?

I disagree with the above poster who said the nursing mom needs to eat a lot of food to nourish her kids. Breastfeeding burns about an extra 500 calories a day. If your wife want to lose some weight after nursing then eating a normal healthy diet is fine - some women who breastfeed think they need to eat a substantial amount of food and have difficulty losing the post-pregnancy weight. As long as she is eating a normal healthy diet, staying hydrated, and not having milk supply issues, then your grocery bill should not rise substantially.
And my toddler hardly eats - even now at almost age 2 it does not affect our food bills hardly at all.

[snshijuptr]

As DH and I consider getting pregnant sometime soon I've had a bit of experience with baby cost calculators. I like Baby Cost Calculator | Tools | BabyCenter for a specific but quick calculator. Personally I did not check most of the baby furniture and assume I will buy clothes at thrift store. Remember that if someone throws you a shower, some of the one-time expenses will be covered. I know my family usually takes care of car seats, strollers, and most of the initial clothes, diapers, etc. Look on craigslist under baby+kids to get some great used estimates.

[MonkeyMama]

Originally Posted by Redraidernurse

I disagree with the above poster who said the nursing mom needs to eat a lot of food to nourish her kids. Breastfeeding burns about an extra 500 calories a day. If your wife want to lose some weight after nursing then eating a normal healthy diet is fine - some women who breastfeed think they need to eat a substantial amount of food and have difficulty losing the post-pregnancy weight.

I think this is a good example of why everyone's financial situation is so unique. Food is a huge expense in my household. It won't be a huge expense for others.

Some women do need a substantial amount of food to maintain their weight and nurse their children. Everyone is different. I know my kids eat far more than average. For reference, we are underweight and high metabolismed. Kids get it from both sides, so probably why they are such bottomless pits. Eating less isn't exactly an option - losing weight certainly wasn't a goal of mine while nursing. But my caloric needs were astronomical when I nursed.

[ua_guy]

I believe the average over 18 years is about $250,000.

If sex came with a warning of "you will be sentenced to the next 18 years and up to $250,000 in fines" in regards to making a baby--people would be a LOT more interested in birth control and condoms.

/inflammatory remark. I am curious to know, though, how much a single kid costs our 'system' when they are on welfare.

[mom-from-missouri]

Some younger friends of ours just had their first baby, now 6 months old. They haven't spent but a few hundred dollars over the past 6 months.

She obtained her crib, high chair and stroller from garage sales for under $50 total. Shower gifts included people going together to buy car seat and swing.

She sewed several baby outfits, but also got several as shower gifts.

She did spend about $200 on cloth diapers and diaper covers. She got the ones that will fit until the baby is toilet trained.

She is nursing 100%.

She takes her baby to work with her (she is a part time nanny for 3 families--mornings at one, afternoons at another families, and evenings for the third family one night a week. So, she pays no child care.

She carefully calculated the amount she is saving by not buying formula and disposable diapers. (This is the good part now...) AND, she puts that amount every week when she gets paid, into a savings account for the babies college. Once it gets up there more, she plans on moving it into mutual funds or something with more earning power. Already they have about $1800 in the account, even after taking some money out to buy the cloth diapers.

Basically the same things I did.

[DebbieL]

Each child is different. I nursed and didn't find I had to eat anything "extra". DD never in her entire babyhood wanted more than one breast at a feeding. My daughter is actually 18 now and still eats probably the equivalent of some people's 3 year olds. She's just never been a big eater. I really notice the difference when her (very overweight) friend comes to stay the night. The friend could eat us out of house and home, but my daughter barely puts a dent in the budget. Somehow DD has grown to 5'7" and 117-120 pounds, but how that happened is beyond me. She never ate more often than every few days during her toddler years. Literally you couldn't make her eat, then every 3-4 days she would actually eat something. She survived on a bit of milk/juice I guess. I never worried about it because she grew normally and was on target or early for all the things she should be doing. The doctor never worried.

We got most baby stuff given to us by grandparents, family and friends (Crib, car seat, stroller, etc). People will give you tonnes of baby clothes. To be honest the only thing DD wore early on were sleepers. We used the same few sleepers all the time. The tags never even came off most of the cute outfits. Babies don't need shoes either until walking, so that's a big waste of money. I know they are adorable looking in the tiny sizes and hard to resist, but we never even put a pair on her feet until she was about 10 months old (walking).

I stayed home with her, so daycare wasn't an issue, and my dad retired around the time she was born, so luckily I had free childcare whenever I wanted and after I did decide to work. My parents were such a huge help. Daycare expense is a killer, and I suspect will be your #1 expense if you require it.

I'm in Canada, so medical expenses are a non-issue and I can't really comment on those.

[woodie96]

ua_guy

LOVE THE WARNING!!!!!
Made me chuckle....

[Scanner]

I will say this - I agree with this book I just read - Cut Your Grocery Bill in half.

If you have a boy, you'll experience food costs at two times in their development:

A. As a baby - let's just say go to Walmart for formula if you are supplementing/bottle feeding. Their lactose-free brand was the cheapest and my kids tolerated the best. I wish I could help you on cost. . .maybe they went thru 1 can/week of the dried powder? Go with dried over the canned infant formula.

B. AS a teenager, your food costs will double back on you, especially if you give birth to a male. Cheap proteins - tuna, peanut butter, and eggs will have to be your staples. Their metabolism is going "anabolic" and it's practically impossible to satiate them.

[JoshuaHeckathorn]

We just had our first child 3 months ago. The first thing that was a real shocker for me was preparing for the medical expenses we were about face. Incredible!

I'm not sure what your health insurance situation is like, but we are both self-employed and have HDHPs with HSAs. My wife's HDHP did cover maternity. The final bills just rolled in and the total was around $10,000 in out-of-pocket expenses for a normal birth with no complications. Our healthy daughter is worth every penny, but the amount of bills that came rolling through was a real eye opener for me.

[greenskeeper]

What is the costs of kids?

priceless

no budget sheet can put a price on the way my son makes me feel each an every day with the new things he learns.