Yet another gift registry occasion?!

[Joan.of.the.Arch]

I just read in another forum that when someone was retiring her boss suggested she create a gift registry so that she could complete her china collection. So she did! And evidently people gave her the china she wanted.

Is that really being done? Can you imagine creating a gift registry for yourself when retiring?

Any other jaws dropping here?

[neobudget]

That is crazy. Gift registries in some circumstances can be very helpful. Like with weddings, for instance. It's great to know what the couple would like, and it's fun to help them start off their new life together. But this new craze for gift registries for everything is pure greed -- straight up.

[akrogers]

I think it's absolutely ridiculous... people are looking at it as a more socially acceptable way of getting stuff for free. Like people who "marry themselves" and start a registry.

[Joan.of.the.Arch]

I just googled "marry yourself".... Hmmm, ya learn somethin' everyday.

But one article suggested you might first need to "divorce your former selves." Costumes, symbols, supplies and officiants can be rented for both occasions. Anybody here need a little side business?

[rob62521]

Goodness, the greed factor seems to be growing. Yikes!

[Goldy1]

Marry yourself? lol, but logically why not , huh? I can understand someone feeling that way after buying gifts for others(but dont' ask for more if you do marry huh?).
I didn't have a baby shower for my only child so when people have them for third children, I raise an eyebrow, but there are greater offenses,

Years ago when fresh out of college, I took a lowly status an paying p/t job at a nonprofit.
The executice director was retiring. Her job consisted of 4 hour lunches and leaving at 2 pm regularly so I rarely saw her. Her second in command hired me, and that persont' boss was my boss.
I had spoken to her twice and each time she was unintentionally condescending to me ie saying I was "too young to think about retirement" when the 401K seminar was held;so a gift collection was set up when she was leaving jobs for another (not retiring)
WE were asked to pay $20 toward a fund to buy her a kayak as a leaving gift. I gave $10 saying it was all I "could afford" (which was actually mor elike "all I felt was reasonable)and got crap for it. Why should I pay the same amount as a full timer who worked with her 15 years?
WE had a collection go around for donations to the Humane Society a week later in honor of a volunteer who's pet died. (good cause but where does it end)
I went on a radio talk show rantign about this last year. I am gonna scream if another freckled cut boyschout hounds me to buy candy outside the market again! I hate saying no!
I recently got invited to my dh's husban'd cousin's wedding shower) I have never met dh's cousin let alone his fiance. lol

[DebbieL]

Ridiculous. I've never heard of such nonsense here (I'm Canadian). I really think the whole gift thing has gotten out of hand. For example, we don't really do the big deal grad thing up here with presents that Americans seem to do. I cannot imagine giving a crap if someone's friend's son graduated high school (whoopee). I certainly don't expect my daughter to get anything (except from me maybe) when she graduates next year. I got nothing (and I was an honour student - boo hoo). Retirement from working IS your gift People have taken things too far.

[Inkstain82]

I wouldn't do it, but the person who put the registry up was happy, and the people who bought for them were apparently happy, so who is hurt?

[Joan.of.the.Arch]

Debbie, I'm wondering for how many years the high school graduation has been a big-deal gift-giving occasion in the US. I graduated in 1977 and mailed out invitations. I was so suprised when my neighbor across the street gave me a present. I'd had no idea anyone might give me presents. In fact, no one else did --not parents, not grandparents, aunts, uncles, godparents --- no one. Maybe it was a gift occasion back then but my circle of relations and friends just could not participate in it at the time. Maybe they were just socially naive and did not know. Maybe they didn't care.... I really don't know. I don't recall my classmates telling me about getting gifts either. But they probably would not have mentioned it.

A generation later, in my own child's time (say 2006), there were many parties and gifts for his friends who were graduated.

[Joan.of.the.Arch]

Inkstain, I don't know whether the people who bought for her were happy. Perhaps they felt their job evaluations were at stake. Perhaps they did give but felt extorted by this boss who suggested and circulated the registry. Goldy1 has told how she felt it inappropriate to ask for gifts from her at work. I've been in similar situations, and even before I received my first paycheck from the place. I was there to make a living (and meager at that) not to fund someone's china collection, or whatever.

[disneysteve]

Originally Posted by Joan.of.the.Arch

Debbie, I'm wondering for how many years the high school graduation has been a big-deal gift-giving occasion in the US.

I graduated HS in 1982 and I got gifts from friends and family. I can't remember but I'm sure I must have had some kind of party, probably at the house.

[DebbieL]

I'm glad we don't do all that here. The only thing here is birthday parties (usually for younger kids), baby showers and wedding showers (and I've never heard of anyone "registering" for either of those things). The only thing anyone registers for here is weddings, and I don't think everyone really cares if you buy something off the registry or not (I don't if there's nothing left on it within my budget - I'll just do a gift certificate for that store for them instead in that case).

[wincrasher]

I think alot of you are looking at this the wrong way.

As a single man, I find that registries really take the pressure off me for gift giving. The whole point of giving a gift is for people to want and enjoy your gift. Not giving them what you would like.

If the old girl would rather have and enjoy a few pieces of her china collection instead of a gold watch, or a potted plant, or a sweater she'll never wear, then if you cared about her, wouldn't you get her what she wanted? Actually she's helping you not waste your money.

Most of the time when an occasion comes up, I have no idea what to get them. Christmas is always a major stressor in this regard. The kids are easiest because they have their own registry - they make lists. I wish the adults would.

I think there should be more registries and people should be encouraged by the stores to do it. More people would get what they want and not waste gifts or return them.