Who paid for your wedding?

[LivingAlmostLarge]

We paid $15k for our wedding and honeymoon 3.5 years ago. And we married 4.5 years ago in front of the justice of the peace.

If my parents paid they wanted a major say and it would have been an over the top wedding. My in-laws never offered.

[scfr]

Marriage Age, both of us: 28 (long ago and oh so far away ...)

Overseas Reception: DH & His Parents (much of the cost recouped in cash gifts from guests)

US Ceremony & Reception: Mostly me. Mom paid for my dress, and DH paid for a videographer because he really wanted one and I couldn't shoehorn one in to my budget. A cousin most graciously hosted the rehersal dinner at her house.


P.S. - Disneysteve, we told you it wouldn't be long after the Bat Mitzvah that you'd start thinking about the wedding costs!

[skylovessea]

I'm 19 and I've been married for about a year and a half.

We paid for the wedding ourselves because we had a secluded beach wedding. We plan on having a traditional renewal of our vows for our 5 year anniversary, and my husband's parents will likely pay because my parent's financial situation isn't exactly suited for it.

[cooliemae]

My DW(35) and I(29) got married three months ago and paid $18,000. My parents did give us a wedding present of $3,000, that went towards the wedding, but other than that we paid for it ourselves.

We were orginally looking at about $12,000, but you know how things go, and i definately couldn't say no to her. I would have changed a thing!

[arthurb999]

My dad paid for rehersal dinner. ~1K
Brides parents paid for rest. ~20K

i have great in-laws thank god

[Cylenchar]

I paid for the justice of the peace and the outdoor reception hall we rented in the state park to do a barbeque to placate the family members who wanted a wedding to go to. Everything (J.o.P, hall rental and food) cost under $1000.

[ktmarvels]

My parents gave me $10,000 and his parents paid for the photographer and rehersal dinner. My parents also helped out with the hotel stay for the bridal party.

I actually don't know how much we ended up spending on the wedding as that "wedding money" quickly got assimilated to "my" money. Though I will say I entered the marriage with money, so I didn't blow through everything!

[fruitbowlk]

My fil paid for our wedding. And he wanted to pay for the honymoon.

[Seeker]

Traditionally, it should have been my family. But essentially, DH & I eloped ; I did not want the headaches (both time and money) that are involved with organizing this; and I don't like being the center of attention.

So, we paid those expenses oursleves (maybe $2k total) and had a small reception for the close family & friends that attended the wedding...probably around a dozen people (think small )

[ithaca]

Married at age 30. Wife's parents gave us a check for $5k, my parents gave us a check for $5k, and we got $5k in gift money from guests. Total wedding costs added up to $16k so we managed to stay close to our budget and only $1k out of our own pockets

[mom-from-missouri]

First one I eloped. Cost was 0. It lasted till the other woman came along...

Second marriage, DH bought the license ($50). I paid for everything else-to the tune of under $500. That included clothes, his ring, the cake, mints and punch and attendents gifts.

We got married in our church, so no fees were involved.

Various family members with nice digital cameras took pictures and put them on CD for us. We have quality photos that were taken FREE, and we only printed what we wanted for our book and the framed ones. (One daughter had a roommate who was majoring in photography-we took some awsome photos as well)

We knew we would be busy the day of the wedding and not get to see all our family--so to be different, we invited all our close friends and family to our rehearsal, when we knew we could visit more. (also some who had to work the day of the wedding). DH paid for the rehearsal dinner, with the help of his daughter who worked at a resturant--she got all the food--pizza, salads, deserts,speg, lasagana, breads..and set up a buffet at church. His 19 year old daughter, by working there got us a 60% discount--I think he paid around $200 to feed around 75 people, with her discount. And, the food was good. The resturant is often favorable mentioned in the KC paper and ST Joseph paper food reviews.

He also bought my rings-but my wedding band was not expensive (my engagement ring is another story and we did not count it in the wedding budget as it was bought long before)

That was almost 3 years ago when he was 46 and I was 45. (Yea, so now you know how old I am now...)

[mnpqrd]

Originally Posted by disneysteve

Where I'm from, traditionally the bride's family pays for the wedding.

Was/Is this a common practice in the West? I'm from Southeast Asia and if I'm not mistaken the groom's family pays for the wedding.

[disneysteve]

Originally Posted by mnpqrd

Was/Is this a common practice in the West? I'm from Southeast Asia and if I'm not mistaken the groom's family pays for the wedding.

I've always figured it was the modern incarnation of a dowry, what the bride's family would pay the groom. Instead of giving a plot of land, a milk cow and some chickens, it became a buffet and open bar.

[sydneysky84]

grooms parents

[kilcher]

Wife's parents bought her wedding dress. We paid for the wedding ourselves. We had a very nice church wedding with a catered meal for about $1200 (not including the honeymoon). We see expensive weddings as a waste.

[sakigt]

$10,000 from dad
$3,000 from mom
$3,000 from MIL
$4,000 from FIL

$20K covered food/booze for 145, honeymoon, rehearsal dinner for 100 people, mariachi band, DJ, limo, gift bags for out of town guests, etc etc etc.

$13k was food/booze/photography alone. We were VERY good about the budget and did stuff like the favors, flowers, gift bags, invitations and lots of little stuff on our own. We also hired a friend as a personal assistant of sorts for the day of that handled all the minor details I didnt give a crap about. We had a BLAST!

[Exile]

DW and I were married 38 years ago. We paid for the whole thing, but it was a private ceremony, and the main expense was the reception, which we had at a steak house for about 50 people. That came to a couple hundred dollars (remembr this was 1970, but even then that amount was not a biggie for that many people). Technically, I could say that my dad paid for part of it because he sprung an unexpected cash gift on us at the restaurant in addition to his and my mother's original wedding present.

[lemmyk]

I am 33, wife 30, married for a bit over 10 years (10/1998).

Wife's heritage is not about bride's family paying for wedding, but they did pay for Dress+shoes, etc, plus paid for/hosted the rehearsal dinner. Also kicked in for the shower. Probably a total of $2500 (about $1000 towards the wedding).

Luckily, wifeys family is huge. Shower had 200+ people (Jack and Jill), and we raised about $4000 cash, and stuff for the condo + the wedding party gave $2000 for appliances for the condo (wedding party was about 20 people, 8 pairs + kids).

My mom and dad gave us $1k each (they were divorced).

We saved for the wedding by living at home and working full-time since engagement (engaged in 1996).

Wedding was about $25,000, and the honeymoon about $4000 + $1000 cash to bring.

Total cost, $30,000.

$4000 from Shower.
$2000 from my Parents
$1000 from in-laws

We must have saved $23,000 on our own, in two years... wow. Never really thought of that.

I was 21-23 during the time, and wife was 18-20. I was making about $23k at the time, wife was about $20k.

Not too bad...

[plumpossum]

We married in 2006. I was 22 and he was 23. It's kind of a funny story because we had been together 5 years, bought a house, had a child, and were listed as beneficiaries in every possible spot for eachother, but then he lost his health insurance through work. The only way to add him to mine was to get married (I already had a family plan being that our son was on it.) So I called him from my lunch break one day and said, "so wanna get married?" We never really had a reason to get married and both hate weddings, it took the health insurance thing to force us into it

Anyway, we were married in the county court house (it took 5 weeks to get an appointment! no quickie eloping here). Caoineag- I also have a very large family (my mother has 11 siblings, my father 5) and when we thought about doing a wedding we realized that no matter how much trimming we did, our guest list would be a minimum of 150 people and there's no way we could afford it.

The license and judge fees were around $80 I think
I bought a new outfit for around $50, he wore something he had
Our parents paid for lunch in a nice restaurant for us, our parents, my brother, and our grandparents.
His parents sent us on a surprise overnight stay in a nearby hotel with dinner included at around $200.
My family bought us a very nice, older dining set for around $200.

Our wedding was pretty unconventional compared to most of our friends'. As you can imagine, being 25 means all of my girlfriends are getting married right now. I've noticed that the norm here is for the mother of the bride to pay for the wedding gown, and sometimes catering. Grooms' families seem to pay for honeymoons. The only girl I know whose family paid for the entire wedding (ceremony & reception) was my brother's wife, and her father is a Philadelphia attorney. I'm not sure if it's that they have a lot of money, or that they are east coasters versus us being midwesterners.