"I take care of my things. After all, those of us as has few things to begin with must take care, lest we have fewer." - Erica Eisdorfer
logo

Go Back   Saving Advice > Financial Chit Chat > General Discussion

General Discussion Please read our Forum Rules before posting
Feel free to talk about anything and everything about money.

Reply
 
LinkBack Thread Tools
  #1 (permalink)  
Old 01-02-2009, 02:54 PM
irmanator irmanator is offline
$ Saving College Freshman
 
Join Date: Aug 2007
Posts: 647
Points: 3825.00
Donate
Default car repairs

My dad is bailing me out again, against my will kinda. I asked him a question about a problem with my car and commented that this was a sucky time cause i really couldn't afford this right now. So he took it into his own hands and sent a tow truck and had it brought to his trusted mechanic. I told him i would pay him back at tax refund time and he wont let me. I know this is not so terrible a problem however it interferes with my need to be a responsible adult. But i can't exactly refuse it right now. I am 37 and he is retired and 72 I don't want to take his money permenantly. what would you do about making him take money?
Reply With Quote
  #2 (permalink)  
Old 01-02-2009, 03:25 PM
GREENBACK's Avatar
GREENBACK GREENBACK is offline
$ Saving College Senior
 
Join Date: Sep 2008
Posts: 1,537
Points: 8455.00
Donate
Default

Buy him a nice gift at some point and be gracious of his gift (car repair) to you.
Reply With Quote
  #3 (permalink)  
Old 01-02-2009, 03:38 PM
maat55's Avatar
maat55 maat55 is offline
$ Saving Post Graduate
 
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Oklahoma
Posts: 3,481
Points: 18557.00
Donate
Default

Are you building a small EF to keep this from happening in the future. I would also save and insist he take my money for the repairs, after the EF. Allowing him to fix your problems is part of the reason that at 37 you needed his help.
Reply With Quote
  #4 (permalink)  
Old 01-02-2009, 03:40 PM
GREENBACK's Avatar
GREENBACK GREENBACK is offline
$ Saving College Senior
 
Join Date: Sep 2008
Posts: 1,537
Points: 8455.00
Donate
Default

Better advice than mine maat55 but still do the gift when you can.
Reply With Quote
  #5 (permalink)  
Old 01-02-2009, 03:59 PM
irmanator irmanator is offline
$ Saving College Freshman
 
Join Date: Aug 2007
Posts: 647
Points: 3825.00
Donate
Default

um the reason i am uncomfortable with this is because he hasn't really done this before, but last month i repaired the heater core (450$) then I took it in for inspection not expecting anything wrong because it is a decent car. Was told it would need springs and someother stuff totalling 1200 so i was content to park it and carpool to work till taxes. Then he took over that stuff got fixed and the only reason i even told him about this was because i thought new problems were due to to bad workmanship on his mechanics repair so since he handled that and mechanic did not know me i felt he should take it back. but it was not negligence.

long story short--- he never used to do much of anything for us since the divorce when i was 5. so I didnt expect him to fly in and be my savoiur and am uncomfortable with it. I am used to taking care of myself maybe in a backwards way - but struggled on my own--
Reply With Quote
  #6 (permalink)  
Old 01-02-2009, 04:21 PM
maat55's Avatar
maat55 maat55 is offline
$ Saving Post Graduate
 
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Oklahoma
Posts: 3,481
Points: 18557.00
Donate
Default

Does he live close? How did he know of the problem? If you are uncomfortable, save up an EF, save for the repairs, pay him back, then thank him nicely. Or you could do as GREENBACK suggested and give him a gift. Under the circumstances, a gift may be nice.
Reply With Quote
  #7 (permalink)  
Old 01-02-2009, 05:59 PM
irmanator irmanator is offline
$ Saving College Freshman
 
Join Date: Aug 2007
Posts: 647
Points: 3825.00
Donate
Default

yea I will try that my brother says he will let him pay for taking out to dinner so if he still refuses money i will do that i guess. Also i have been trying to get an ef but everytime i get close something breaks.
Reply With Quote
  #8 (permalink)  
Old 01-02-2009, 07:31 PM
maat55's Avatar
maat55 maat55 is offline
$ Saving Post Graduate
 
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Oklahoma
Posts: 3,481
Points: 18557.00
Donate
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by irmanator View Post
yea I will try that my brother says he will let him pay for taking out to dinner so if he still refuses money i will do that i guess. Also i have been trying to get an ef but everytime i get close something breaks.
It seems like problems come in spirts, hopefully you will get ahead of them soon.
Reply With Quote
  #9 (permalink)  
Old 01-02-2009, 09:07 PM
mom-from-missouri mom-from-missouri is offline
$ Saving College Senior
 
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: Northern Missouri
Posts: 1,743
Last Blog Entry: no grocery shopping update
Points: 24265.30
Donate
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by irmanator View Post
long story short--- he never used to do much of anything for us since the divorce when i was 5. so I didnt expect him to fly in and be my savoiur and am uncomfortable with it. I am used to taking care of myself maybe in a backwards way - but struggled on my own--
Maybe he is doing it because he feels he needs to do it for himself--like maybe he is trying to make up for it now????
I would have a heart to heart with him. If he can afford it, and it makes him feel better, let him do it this once. It may make him feel better about not being there much before. As we age, we see things differently and maybe he is just needing to make peace with himself...
__________________
mom-from-missouri

http://countrysidechristianacademy.blogspot.com/
Reply With Quote
Reply



Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off



Powered by vBulletin®
Copyright ©2000 - 2012, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
SEO by vBSEO 3.0.0 RC6 © 2006, Crawlability, Inc.

Copyright © 2012 SavingAdvice.com. All Rights Reserved.