The Jones

[Ima saver]

Good article. I always wonder about the lives of the rich friends that invite us to all the great parties. They spend over $5000 for a 5 hour party!! We enjoy their parties, but when we have one, it is hamburgers on the grill out by the creek!!

[shengmei]

Is that an anniversary party? I could imagine spending that much if hubby and I were married for 60 years. Otherwise it really would be a waste.

[Ima saver]

No,, this was just a 50's party for no reason. Plus they spent that much on a Halloween party too. We just go and enjoy, we can't compete and don't want to.

[kealina]

jeez ima... that's a crazy amount to spend...my family only did something like that once that i can remember (and this was my parents and all my aunts and uncles chipping in) was for my grandparents 50th anniversary celebration... other than that we all just potluck at someones house... weddings not counted of course...

[Bookie]

I've been to parties like that, Ima, and they can be fun.

What strikes me about the Joneses is how busy they seem. Their lives are filled with events, acquisitions, excursions and commitments. They schedule their leisure as tightly as they do their working hours. They're forever in touch, on the go, arriving or departing. Their homes are spacious, but when are they home? They glory in having the latest toys, but when do they find time to play? They buy the best for the children they don't have time to parent. They never stop long enough to ask where they think they're going.

I know them, have them as friends (or try to), love some of them, but, ultimately I find them exhausting. What I miss in them is any sense of repose. What I find lacking is any sense of joy. One of my best-kept secrets is the pity with which I regard them, these sadly deluded people who succeed at anything they try and fail at everything that matters.

[markio26]

great description of some of my pals too, bookie..

[Ima saver]

Yes, you are right, they are always on the go. They have trips to take every month! They are always shopping, or visiting, or playing golf, just busy, busy every minute. I personally enjoy just being at home. I live in beautiful mountain scenery, on a neat creek, why do I need to go anywhere and spend money! (Also, the husband does not know how much the wife spends on the parties)

[Duchesse]

The Jones' are jealous of The Frugals .

The Jones' would like to plunder The Frugals' bank account and swap credit scores. LOL

[Ima saver]

You are probably right, Duchesse!! The Jones i know all have manicures and pedicures! (and fancy hair dos)

[mccartygirl]

ANd I know a couple of people I consider the joneses & some are actually paying cash while others are 2 steps from falling flat!!

I was just going to say that Snoopy. Some of those Jones are paying with cash, some can "afford" it and just like to have that stuff. I don't think there is anything wrong with wanting and buying that stuff if you're paying cash. This is probably going to sound stupid on a frugal site but here it goes - If the Roth is maxed, maxed out the 401K at work, have college $$ put aside for the kids, house paid off, no debt, etc - at what point are you supposed to say, "I've saved XX this year, I'm going to spend some" Sometimes I think people get down on the Jones because some of them spend their money, along with saving it. I think it's great being debt free and saving money but when are you going to spend that money?? Is there a happy medium? Again, I know - stupid comment on a frugal site

We take 2-4 trips a year, Disney and Hawaii this year, does that mean it's wrong to go? We take our child on trips so that she can see different cultures, different areas, etc. I don't know, sometimes I think the forums get down on people if they spend money. We also save a lot of our money, I want to be able to enjoy trips now - who knows when it's going to be your last day here.

[Ima saver]

I think it is ok to spend some of it too!! My house is paid for, my only real debt is some land that I bought for investment. I could pay it off, but I am putting a lot of cash in a spec house that we are selling.
I have been on lots of trips, 14 cruises. I drive a real nice sports car and my dh has the hot rod car of his dreams.(paid for) I don't find it necessary to spend money on "stuff" I prefer spending it on something that I will really enjoy.

[lrjohnson]

Originally Posted by mccartygirl

sometimes I think the forums get down on people if they spend money

I don't know what you mean about "get down on people" but I've rarely even seen gentle chiding myself, and only when the person spent money on something they didn't get value out of and didn't want to spend money one. I've expressed numerous times that one of the reasons I save is to be able to travel, and I generally travel internationally twice a year, and I have only ever gotten positive feedback for that. My experience has been that SavingAdvice folk tend to be very kind, and understanding of the reality that people do have different priorities.

[mccartygirl]

This thread is kind of "down" on the Jones. That was my only point. People on this forum are very nice and kind, but I think when talking about the Jones it's kind of negative. The negativity isn't pointed at one person like, "McCartyGirl - you're a such and such for spending money", it's more down in the way that it's an insult to be a Jones or want something the Jones' have. Maybe I took the thread a little to heart because I travel, I get pedicures every 5-6 weeks, get a new vehicle every 3 years, etc. The comments aren't always in a positive light when talking about stuff like that:

The Jones i know all have manicures and pedicures! (and fancy hair dos)

Although, I don't get manis nor do I have a fancy hair do I wasn't saying that anyone is wrong or right, just wondering at what point to people say that they're going to spend what they've saved.

To some others - a lot of the people on the board are Jones' - it's all what one considers the Jones'. And what one has and doesn't have, wants and doesn't want, etc.

I agree LR - we save so that we can travel, and stay at nicer hotels and such.

I hope that no one thinks I meant that they were mean or anything, again, I might have taken it to heart a little too much.

[mccartygirl]

Ima - do you watch The Sopranos? You made me laugh when you said "spec house" because Tony Sopranos wife is always complaining about her spec house.

[Ima saver]

No, I don't watch the sopranos. A spec house is a house that is up for sale, speculative house. I do not mean to put down anyone that has manicures and pedicures or fancy hair do's. Those things are not important to me. Yet, i drive around in an expensive car, when a $20,000 car would get me to all the same places.
I think when we refer to the Jones, we are talking about people like one couple we built a house for. She shopped everyday. Their kids had every toy imaginable. They build one special room just to hold her winter clothes. They leased 7 cars in just one year. But when it came to paying the bills on their house, they did not have any savings to finish the house. We wound up paying their final bill cause it was in our name. They told us, they had no cash, but had a 7500 sq. foot house on two lake lots!(and a big mortgage)

[lucasrd]

Here's a good example...my brother just got married 1month ago. He makes $17k/yr and is still in school. His wife makes 30K/yr.

My wife and I make about $180K/yr. We just purchased a used, but loaded Ford pickup truck for $20K. We've been married for 4 years and are quite stable...

My brother had been saying he wasn't going to buy a new car until he graduated and got a full time job...however, after one ride in our truck, he had a new $25K SUV (with 92 miles) tax, title, license, and extended warranty all financed.....

I swear had he not seen my truck, he would still be driving his 92 Ford Ranger and Her 94 Ford Escort, both of which ran very well and were paid off...but nope, ne had to "keep up" with his older brother...

I tried to talk him out of it..and even found him a 2005 model with only 4000 miles on it, all the same options for $15K...but he didn't care and bought a BRAND NEW CAR....

They just financed a car for over 1/2 of what they make in a year...oh well, not my problem I guess.

[rob62521]

I think much of society wants to keep up with these folks -- look at all the debt!

[sakigt]

Originally Posted by Ima saver

Yet, i drive around in an expensive car, when a $20,000 car would get me to all the same places.
)

What sports car do you drive Ima? Im the same way...Im working towards buying an S2000 in 4-5 years

[Ima saver]

I have a red corvette, also a tu toned blue corvette that I bought new in 1978. My husband has a red 1933 ford victoria hot rod. (Cars are his hobby. He worked 7 days a week, so I indulge him)

[miclason]

I think it's not the concept of spending that people in these forums is against...it's the notion of acquiring debt