Will I save a lot of money by NOT having kids?

[F16]

Originally Posted by hakuna matata

Okay you think about this then--say you are 60 years old and you had kids because someone on a message board thought you should. You resented having the kids, they know it, and they don't visit you because they hate you. So there you are all alone, and nobody thinks about you...etc.

You know what, we all live to help each other. That's the main reason of human existance. When someone doesn't want to have his/her own children, then I think it would be great, when they adopt some child.
And I can assure you, adopted kind will be always greatful to you for saving him and giving him love and care. When someone has the opportunity, including financial opportunity to help that children, why not make a use of that. Living only for yourself, living only for fun and entertainment, is selfish and useless.

Originally Posted by hakuna matata

So for you, clearly you need children to feel complete. Great on you.

I also think that children are given by God, and when they are given, I hope I will take that gift with all responsibility.
Imagine that. I am in hospital. I am sick. And there are nobody to come to visit me, say "Hello, Dad! How are you? We have brought some fresh fruits for you".

Originally Posted by hakuna matata

It was also important to me, but it isn't to everyone and you really have no business telling people their life is not complete without children. Simply isn't any of your business in my humble opinion.

Ok, I am sorry. I was wrong.

[hakuna matata]

Originally Posted by F16

You know what, we all live to help each other. That's the main reason of human existance. When someone doesn't want to have his/her own children, then I think it would be great, when they adopt some child.
And I can assure you, adopted kind will be always greatful to you for saving him and giving him love and care. When someone has the opportunity, including financial opportunity to help that children, why not make a use of that. Living only for yourself, living only for fun and entertainment, is selfish and useless..

Well obviously that would be great and while I might agree with you, there are lots of folks who wouldn't. Doesn't make us right now does it? And it doesn't make those who make that choice selfish or useless. Sorry I truly can't agree with you there.

Originally Posted by F16

I also think that children are given by God, and when they are given, I hope I will take that gift with all responsibility.
Imagine that. I am in hospital. I am sick. And there are nobody to come to visit me, say "Hello, Dad! How are you? We have brought some fresh fruits for you".

.

Again I agree that my daughter is the best thing that has happened to me. Doesn't guarantee that when you are in the hospital that anyone is going to visit you does it? We all know people who were, shall we say overjealous in some aspect of raising their children and now that the children are older, the children have nothing to do with the parent. There are no guarantees in life. Having children doesn't mean they will be there for you when you are older. I am hopeful that my daughter will be, but who knows what the future holds.

My issue with your post was your condemnation of those who choose to not have children. Having children is a very big responsibility and one that should be entered into only with due consideration for all that is involved, and not to create 'purpose' for ones life. Just my opinion--yours obviously varies from mine and I wish you good luck in your life and endeavors

[F16]

Originally Posted by hakuna matata

I wish you good luck in your life and endeavors

tnx so much!

[PrincessPerky]

What happened to friends? I have more friends than kids. lonely old folk are lonely for many reasons, not because they have no kids.... (and plenty did have kids)

IMO it isn't great to think kids are the be all end all...that is an aweful lot of responsibility to lay on a kid. Not fair to the poor kid.

[ScrimpAndSave]

F16, the purpose of my life is none of your business. You obviously are too closed minded to even contend with.

I pity your children.

[LivingAlmostLarge]

I have no chidren yet, and probably will. BUT I think that not having children is fine as well. My best friend will probably never have any and IS great. She is not selfish or stupid, and because she knows herself and her lifestyle. Instead I think it's wiser that she does what makes her most comfortable.

Children are a responsibilty. Geez a lou. Having some for purpose, well you're just asking for bad things to happen.

[Seeker]

Guys,

There are certain posts that really should never exist. A teacher asking the question of "Will I save lots of money by NOT having kids?" Come on.

The question is mean-hearted to those of us who would have loved to have children but simply could not. It's a very inconsiderate topic and has no place in this forum.

Let this topic die please.

[SnoopyCool]

Originally Posted by rob62521

Well put, Princess!

The Genesis verse beforementioned was when Noah was leaving the ark with his family and two of every animal and God told them to multiply because they were the only ones left...the verse was taken out of context.

That's in Gen 1:28, spoken to Adam and Eve.

I think children deserve to go to a home where they are wanted. I love my brood of 4 and may have more, but wouldn't begrudge or be ugly to anyone who feels differently. I may not understand this thinking, but we're all different and come from different places.

Anyway, you may or may not save money by not having children. We manage to save more now than ever, and make just a hair more per year than we did b.c. (Before children). Ours was a matter of getting our ducks in a row and getting educated about how to handle money (ongoing).

[Exile]

You will save thousands of dollars per year and possibly your mental health as well.

[Beccagold]

Originally Posted by F16

Guys, think about this:
You are 60 years old, rich, you are living a high-level lifestyle and evenings you are ALONE in your home. There is nobody who thinks about you, there is nobody who cares is everything allright with you or not.
There is nobody who will support you. There is nobody who will bring you a glass of water. And there will be nobody who will come to say you last goodbye.

I have to admit this is one of my pet peeves in the discussion of having children. There is no guarantee your children will be there for you when you are older. The same argument goes for the only child debate when people say the child needs a friend. There is no guarantee your children will like eachother or get along.

These are not the reasons to have children. My personal belief is that too many people have children for the wrong reasons, i.e. they're supposed to, somebody to take care of them, etc.

[ActYourWage]

Originally Posted by Seeker

Guys,

There are certain posts that really should never exist. A teacher asking the question of "Will I save lots of money by NOT having kids?" Come on.

The question is mean-hearted to those of us who would have loved to have children but simply could not. It's a very inconsiderate topic and has no place in this forum.

Let this topic die please.

I agree. The title of this post does come across as sounding selfish. I am sure the OP isn't that way, but one should use common sense on such topics.

[ScrimpAndSave]

Blah blah blah.

I think it is much more selfish to having children for the wrong reasons or have them and be completely unprepared.

To each his own.

[aida2003]

Originally Posted by ScrimpAndSave

Blah blah blah.

I think it is much more selfish to having children for the wrong reasons or have them and be completely unprepared.

To each his own.

After reading such an answer, I have no clue why you started the topic in the first place. You already had answers

[lgslgs]

Originally Posted by F16

Guys, think about this:
You are 60 years old, rich, you are living a high-level lifestyle and evenings you are ALONE in your home. There is nobody who thinks about you, there is nobody who cares is everything allright with you or not.
There is nobody who will support you. There is nobody who will bring you a glass of water. And there will be nobody who will come to say you last goodbye.

Then get a dog.

[ScrimpAndSave]

And...as selfish and harsh as it sounds...it is really just an honest question.

I didn't ask, "If I give my kids away - will I save money?"

Haha...obviously once they are born, you can never imagine your life without them. I don't think it is right to have them if you really can't afford them.

[gamecock43]

So then I guess your question was intended to be- "how expensive is a child?" and a follow up question is "how expensive would a child cost ME?"

because your choices when raising the kid will affect the cost.

While the answers to question #1 can range from 'not very expensive' comparing low income households to upper class households to 'very expensive', this question is easier to quantify.

And by understanding the basic costs associated with question #1, you can apply it to question #2 which deals with you specifically.

If you dont want kids you dont want kids. I call 'the mall' my natural birth control because seeing screaming children while ragged mothers shop reaffirms I am not ready for kids.

But you being a teacher, your husband being a soon- to- be- lawyer, can afford kids if you wanted them. So if you worry you cant afford them, dont worry, you can.

[ActYourWage]

Originally Posted by gamecock43

So then I guess your question was intended to be- "how expensive is a child?" and a follow up question is "how expensive would a child cost ME?"

because your choices when raising the kid will affect the cost.

While the answers to question #1 can range from 'not very expensive' comparing low income households to upper class households to 'very expensive', this question is easier to quantify.

And by understanding the basic costs associated with question #1, you can apply it to question #2 which deals with you specifically.

If you dont want kids you dont want kids. I call 'the mall' my natural birth control because seeing screaming children while ragged mothers shop reaffirms I am not ready for kids.

But you being a teacher, your husband being a soon- to- be- lawyer, can afford kids if you wanted them. So if you worry you cant afford them, dont worry, you can.

Nicely stated.

[tripods68]

Coulda shoulda woulda have children.....things happen in life. You accept it as they are. In a way, it's a rhotorical question. Of course, you will saved TONS of money if you don't have children. DisneySteve already answered that question.

I think my wife and I would be fine being married without kids. But we wanted to share the abundance of life with our own flesh and blood. We were ready to accept kids in our life, we are both loving parents. We didn't plan to have kids right- a-way, but we were prepared for the unexpected. But the main question should be asked will a child bring pure happiness to your marriage life? If you are not married yet, then its a tough question to answer.

[disneysteve]

Originally Posted by tripods68

But the main question should be asked will a child bring pure happiness to your marriage life?

As the father of a pre-teen girl, I can tell you quite emphatically that the answer to that question is NO!

This thread has wandered all over the place. The orginal question has been answered. Yes, it is cheaper not to have kids.

Other issues have come up: Should you have kids? When can you afford to have kids? Is it okay to just have one kid? Etc. Those are totally different issues and there is no right answer to them. It is a personal decision. Let's leave it at that.