Daughter's House in Foreclosure

jwthornhill · #1 (**permalink**) 02-25-2007, 10:52 AM

Hi,

I know I'm new here but, we were just told today (Sunday 2/25) by our daughter and son-in-law that they haven't made a payment on their house in over 9 months!!

Why they didn't say anything until now. I don't know. But, is there anything that they can do to save their home at this point?

Thanks,

Ima saver · #2 (**permalink**) 02-25-2007, 10:53 AM

I am so sorry to hear that. I don't know what they can do but they should ask the mortgage holder.

cschin4 · #3 (**permalink**) 02-25-2007, 11:04 AM

Sorry to hear that. But, I don't think you should try to "save" the home. Let it go. They obviously can't afford it and if you "save" it they will probably lose it later anyway. Sometimes people have to learn life the hard way.

cicy33 · #4 (**permalink**) 02-25-2007, 11:21 AM

I think it depends on the reasoning why it wasn't paid. Was there a sudden problem, like a lost job, or loss of income or something? Is it actually in foreclosure or just way behind? If it is not in foreclosure yet you can usually talk to the bank and they will work with you. I think if it already is then you either have to pay the amount due in full at that time or lose it.

Snoopy2645 · #5 (**permalink**) 02-25-2007, 07:24 PM

I would try to help them get it together like others stated figure out why it wasnt paid & try to give some financial lessons on paying thier bills before having "fun" or whatever. My oldest is only 12 so I havent been in your shoes yet but I would do what you can to get this straight with them or you may have adult children coming home with a family KWIM??

And my guess is no one wants that LOL I know my mom & I both are best friends but thats because we dont live together & never could!!!

disneysteve · #6 (**permalink**) 02-25-2007, 07:45 PM

I have mixed feelings here. Obviously, you don't want to see your daughter and son-in-law out on the street, but at the same time, what the heck were they thinking and where have they been for 9 months? I guess they were afraid/ashamed to admit to anyone that they were in trouble, but unfortunately burying your head in the sand doesn't make your problems go away. It just gives them time to get bigger and bigger.

Are you truly in a position to help them financially without sacrificing your own well being and your future needs? And forget "lending" them money. You should not give them a penny that you can't afford to never see again. Anything you give them should be considered a gift from day one.

I would want to know the answer to the question posed by cicy33. Why have they been unable to make payments? Did they experience some financial catastrophe? If so, did you not know about it? If, however, the problem was self-induced - wasteful spending, gambling, etc. - then I'd say they need to clean up their own mess. That may sound cold and heartless but what would they do if you weren't around, and what lesson are they learning if you swoop in and bail them out? I'm curious to hear how this plays out.

thebetterlifenow · #7 (**permalink**) 02-25-2007, 09:15 PM

So sad. I wouldn't loan them anything. If you give them money, make it a gift. You probably will never see it again. The best way you can help them is to give them the book by Dave Ramsey called Total Money Makeover and work with them as they go through it. It made my marriage and life a lot better and we are now debt free after a lot of hard work!

They are probably going to lose the house. If you wanted, you could do something like rent them a storage unit for their furniture and get them a moving truck. They are going to have to start from scratch and pull themselves out of this one. We had to. It will make them stronger in the long run and they will respect money more after it is all over.

LuxLiving · #8 (**permalink**) 02-26-2007, 06:48 AM

relevant article:

http://articles.moneycentral.msn.com...e9Options.aspx

Ima saver · #9 (**permalink**) 02-26-2007, 07:45 AM

Good article, Lux!

bjl584 · #10 (**permalink**) 02-26-2007, 10:08 AM

I was unaware that you could default on a mortgage for over 9 months. I thought that after 2 or 3 months, the bank would proceed with foreclosure and remove the guilty party from the premises.

jwthornhill · #11 (**permalink**) 03-09-2007, 06:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bjl584

I was unaware that you could default on a mortgage for over 9 months. I thought that after 2 or 3 months, the bank would proceed with foreclosure and remove the guilty party from the premises.

You are right. It turns out that it was too late to do a deed in lieu.

Tomorrow morning I'll be helping them move into the trailer.

LuxLiving · #12 (**permalink**) 03-09-2007, 06:40 PM

Does your family realize that by filing bankruptcy it stops any foreclosure proceedings?

bigsaver · #13 (**permalink**) 03-31-2007, 08:02 AM

9 months and no house payment. I hope you like the son in law cause it sounds like they are going to be living with you unless you are independently wealthy. That would probably be the best thing to do for them. Everyone can benefit. They can help pay your bills and they will be able to save some money for a down payment.

PetMom · #14 (**permalink**) 03-31-2007, 12:36 PM

This is becoming more common now with the popular teaser mortgage
rates (usually as part of an ARM)
and lack of prequalifying by realtors who might be obliged to encourage
a bigger house for a bigger commission.

A person should always purchase the least expensive house (with
a good inspection by an unbiased (realtors are know to get a more
lax inspection agent to let house 'pass' to hurry sale) inspector
in as good a neighborhood as possible.

It is so hard to do just this as more and more homes now are
being built that are large, beautiful and expensive. Everyone
lusts after the big house then the reality of the big payments
sets in, plus all the other costs associated with a home.

For this couple, a trailer sounds good for now. I have read a
few financial writings on what a good buy this is and they do
not have a land rental if they park it on your property. (Our
family actually knows a plumber who lives in a tent on his
families property - in an area where this is allowed).

b4freedom · #15 (**permalink**) 04-02-2007, 06:57 PM

You need to provide more information. What's the monthy payment? How much are they past due? What are the odds of them coming due?

jwthornhill · #16 (**permalink**) 04-06-2007, 01:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by b4freedom

You need to provide more information. What's the monthy payment? How much are they past due? What are the odds of them coming due?

Unfortunately, they are not alone.

They moved out into a family friends trailer about one month ago.

The monthly payment was around $1200.00 and the odds of them coming due are completely out now.

The last we checked the house was around 11 months in the rear.

Thanks for all of the advice.

LuxLiving · #17 (**permalink**) 04-07-2007, 09:43 AM

How much equity do they have in the house???

I'm not normally a fan of bankruptcy, but in my state when someone files for bkptcy it puts a dead stop on any foreclosure in process. If they have a hunk of money tied up in the house even if they have already moved out it could help them possibly save it - at least for long enough to try to sell it and get out from under the payments.