How expensive are kids, really?

[pearlieq]

Some helpful replies on another thread I started got me to thinking. How did having a baby affect your budget/expenses?

DH and I were planning to start a family this year and I had intended to set aside about $2,000 for "start-up" expenses.

Honestly, I wasn't anticipating much of a change to our budget except for that. We figured in a college fund, but otherwise I was planning to breastfeed, use cloth diapers, and get most of my baby supplies and clothes from garage sales and thrift stores.

I was figuring between some supplies and maybe an extra co-pay or two that the baby wouldn't cost more than an extra $50-$100 per month. And I was figuring that would mostly be offset by the fact that we wouldn't be going out as much.

Am I in for a rude awakening?

[Feel free to have a chuckle if I sound like a total rookie. But make sure you set me straight!]

[vsjhoc]

I have absolutely no experience in these matters, but this article entitled "The Hidden Costs of Parenthood" may help.

[tinapbeana]

ok, no kids here but one of my co-workers is expecting and another has 5 (ACK!!!)

co-worker w/ 5 had their last one 4 months ago. cost of the delivery was 15k, i think 80% covered by insurance. one that is expecting now is having to pay $300 out of pocket for pre-natal and an estimated 2-3k OOP for the delivery.

this is assuming no complications, and of course your insurance may vary...

need to find out how much it will cost to add a child to your current insurance coverage. here employee & family is about $100 more than employee & spouse.

items that will likely need to be bought new: car seat.

[pearlieq]

Originally Posted by vsjhoc

I have absolutely no experience in these matters, but this article entitled "The Hidden Costs of Parenthood" may help.

Thanks for the link.

Oh my goodness! I just read this and I think I need to go curl up in the fetal position for a while.

$2800 for marching band!?!

[MonkeyMama]

You are in for a RUDE awakening.

Personally I don't think the costs of children are what you think about ahead of time or even what is in these articles.

One thing depends if you are goin gto stay home or not.

Frankly I do not spend much on the kids as a whole, they are not expensive at face value with food and clothing (my kids are 3 & 1).

Formula and diapers are huge in the beginning. I pretty much breastfed both babies, even working and all, but a can of formula is ridiculous - maybe $10-$20 - I don't even remember - just pricey. Even if you intend to breastfeed it might not work out so you have to include it in your budget. I used formula as a supplement after the first few months. The first one was barely on formula, and the second one was on it for 6 months I believe - had much more issues. Diapers are pricey too - count 4 years - kids train late these days.

For us though the really expensive part is healthcare. When we decided to have kids we were paying $200/month at most for our coverage. Today we pay $900/month for the same plan with a family of 4 - and it doesn't seem to be going down - 10-40% increased evey year. Plan ahead for it, I Wish I had any idea... (Higher premiums mean better coverage though - entire pregnancy, deliver, infant checkups cost $300 at most out of pocket)

My oldest is 3.5 and my dh has not worked in 4.5 years or so. In our original plan he would return to work in another few years. This seems less and less likely and prudent as time goes on. Today he can not even find a minimum wage job to supplement our income. IT would be great and help but no one will hire a guy who stayed home 4 years to raise kids is about what it seems. ??????

These are some of the pricey factors of kids. On the other hand, the extended family spoils them with toys, their clothes are 2nd-hand, they will go to public school, they are happy to play make-believe and go for walks to the park. This part of raising children may be less expensive than you imagine. But look at the bigger picture of how you want to raise them in the early years and how some of the costs of the bigger picture will be. A spouse out of work 5-10 years costs a lot more than just lost wages I am finding out. Daycare around here is $1k/month per kid at best, but depends on the area - not so much in lower-cost areas.

This is not even getting into what if you can not get pregnant and start pricey medical procedures, or alternately you have a problematic pregnancy and take unexpected time off work, or a sick child, or a disabled child that needs care. All things to plan for the best you can. These are the things to really think about.

Good Luck. Don't want to scare you. But truly the more you think and plan ahead the better off you are. Just some of the things I wish I had foreseen a little more.

All that being said too I wouldn't care how much they cost, they are priceless.

[fairy74]

I'm due in July and we are putting $8,500 in our baby fund (insurance costs will be about $1000 out of pocket). My SIL runs a daycare so a little break there ($400 a month) plus supplies and insurance ($200) so I see around $600 a month in baby expenses, however I assume we will be able to cut $200 off the going out/entertainment budget). Like you, I am planning to do it as frugal as possible.

Also articles that talk about how much it costs to have a child, often price everything brand name and brand new, include the cost of formula and every do-hickie ever known to man. I really believe it can be done much cheaper...Just my two cents. Don't get too depressed pearlieq

[MonkeyMama]

Hey that article was pretty good. But the article also mentions a lot you can avoid if you are frugal-minded.

We actually spent a lot on new stuff before the first was born because we had the money, but frankly you can get anything pretty affordable (& nice since people go through them so quick!) 2nd-hand. Like Teana said - only the carseat really has to be new. We have spent about $800 in carseats (2 in each car) and we went best of the best. But were extra frugal in everything else to make up for it. IT was a long while before we even bought a carseat for our 2nd car, just worked up to it - maybe $200/year.

I have been buying a lot of 2nd hand stuff and turning around and selling it for what I paid just a year or 2 later. From that aspect it is not that expensive if you are willing to go used.

[frugalmomof1]

For me, the biggest expense after having a baby is health insurance, which is about $30/week. My insurance is pretty good...I had an emergency C-section, and it cost me about $500 out of pocket...DS was in the NICU for 3 days, and that did not cost me anything.

I breast fed at first but started supplementing right away...DS just didn't 'catch on'....I used formula full time when I returned to work after 3 months....at first I used Enfamil because they sent me a million coupons. Then I bought some Target brand formula and DS didn't have a problem with it. Target brand formula is about $10 less per can. Just something to keep in mind if you can't breastfeed for some reason....check with your peditrician first, of course.

I don't pay for child care because DH and I work opposite shifts. I received an almost new crib and changing table from a coworker, and got a high chair, bassinet, an infant car seat and a toddler car seat at my baby shower...not to mention a TON of clothes, and everything else I needed to set up the nursery.

Aside from diapers, formula and baby food, the only other things I have bought for DS are things that IDH and I want him to have. Make sure you check out websites for baby items...you will be amazed at how many coupons you get in the mail. I haven't had much luck in my area, but Craigslist and freecycle can be a great place to get gently worn clothes, toys, furniture and coats.

With my next baby, the only thing that I will do differently is make my own baby food. $1+ for a pureed banana...please...lol.

I honestly thought that having a child would be much more expensive, but so far it hasn't been too bad. I know it won't be that way when he is older, so I am enjoying it now.

Good Luck!

[LivingAlmostLarge]

I don't know, they can't cost that much or else people with like 10 kids wouldn't be making it. Or seventeen and debt free, that was an article on MSN news. Yeah, I couldn't believe some would actually birth 17 kids. That's a lot of pregnancy. There seems to be a lot of people with many kids living on very little money.

A friend who was going for 12, has 5 already, said the amount you spend on kids is proportional to your income. The less money you have the more you make do with less. The more money you have the more you spend per child. Then when you make like him $30k and 3 kids you still make it by cutting corners. People say it can't be done but it can, but you make a choice to live like that or not.

I personally choose not, but he had a great point. I think it's proportional.

[boefixepa]

There is a great article on this in the tight wad gazette if you have it. It is going to effect you, no doubt about that, but it is going to be your decision how much you spend in the end.

FYI - The baby will have no expectations other then a clean bum, a full tummy, and arms to hold him/her. Everything else are YOUR expectations.

[PRICEPLUS]

Originally Posted by boefixepa

FYI - The baby will have no expectations other then a clean bum, a full tummy, and arms to hold him/her. Everything else are YOUR expectations.

That is a a pretty accurate take on it I'd say!

Reality Check: The only thing of any real value that you will leave behind are your children!

[froggie]

Don't get too scared... it sounds like your planning ahead as much as possible and like boefixepa said, a baby just needs to be loved, fed, and cleaned. Dh and I were worried about affording children and my mom said that if we all waited until we thought we could afford children, most of us never would have them!
Best of luck to you all and I hope that you're on here making a big announcement soon!!!

[zetta]

My baby is 15 months old now, so here's where our money went for the big purchases (in San Diego). I'm in a position to buy new when I want it, but I also like getting a good deal at a garage sale or resale shops. Not everything on my list below is essential, so you can cut back where you see fit.

Even if you breastfeed, be sure and ask for free formula samples at every doctor's visit. I ran into issues with my milk supply at around 4 months, and because I had stocked up on the free formula during the early visits I saved quite a bit of money. If you don't use them you can always donate them later. Also, use up your formula coupons before they expire! I got caught out with quite a few of those.

I made some of my own baby food, but found that even using frozen veggies I wasn't saving enough to make it worth the effort. I calculated that it was about a 20% savings -- but 20% of $30 is only $6.

I use the most expensive brand of diapers (Pampers) because I like them the best. Target and Costco brands are about half the price. I've heard that cloth diapers can be quite expensive initially (you need multiple sizes as they grow), so do research and the math before making a decision. Of couse you save a bunch when you use them for a 2nd kid.

There's also a Carter's clothing outlet where I often find new clothes for $5-$7 (as opposed to $10-$20 new). You can get resale clothes for $1-$5, but some are very faded so you have to be willing to dig.

My equipment list (below) for the first year comes to $1540. I'm sure I've missed some things and the little extras add up so $2000 sounds quite reasonable. I might suggest budgeting closer to the $100/month for diapers, formula, food, and extras. And check out the increase in insurance with your husband's employer, since everyone's rates are different.

Currently I seem to be spending about $75-$100 per month on things like toys, clothes, and misc purchase from Babies R Us. I'm spending about $50/month on diapers and $40/month on whole milk and baby food, so I'm closer to $150 - $200 per month for baby. I think our insurance is about $100 extra per month.

If I had to, I could probably cut back to $25/month on toys, clothes, and misc, $25 on diapers, and maybe $30 on milk and food, for a total of $80/month for baby.


0-3 months
combo stroller/car seat $75 new at Target
bassinet gift, but I've seen them for $40 resale
crib & mattress $200 garage sale (was $600 new!)
bouncy seat $20 resale
pack-n-play $25 garage sale
monitor $20 new
front carrier $60 new
breastfeeding pillow $40 new
bottles, nipples, etc about $30 new
diaper champ $25 new
2 changing table pads $25 new
diaper bag free from hospital
breastfeeding free
diapers can't remember, maybe $60/month?


3-6 months
swing -- gift, but I've seen them for $40 resale
exersaucer $40 resale
backpack $20 resale
playmat $15 ebay
breastpump rental for 2 months about $150
breastfeeding free
formula supplements free samples from doctor's office
diapers $50-60/month

6-9 months
jogging stroller $25 garage sale
high chair $120 new
convertible car seat $120 new
convertible car seat (2nd car) $120 new
better backpack $60 resale
baby proofing stuff about $40 new
3 gates, $60 each = $180 new
formula $20/month Target brand
baby food about $30/month
diapers $50/month

9-12 months
umbrella stroller $30 new
walker/ride-on toy $10 resale
outdoor baby swing $10 resale
formula $20/month Target brand
baby food about $30/month
diapers $50/month

12-15 months
2 gallons whole milk per week -- about $18/month
baby food about $20/month
diapers $50/month

[cicy33]

I am the proud mother of a 21 year old and four step kids. I am also going to be a grandma soon, Yea me!!! anyways, as was put so beautifully above, kids are only as expensive as you make them! I did disposable with my daughter for a brief while but the laundry (and not just the diaper) was sooo much worse than just buying diapers. Everyone has their favorite brand, I used pampers too when she was a baby but nowadays so many coupons, free samples, you can get them at a baby shower for gifts. Make sure to have a baby shower! I did not breastfeed ( I was only 17, no way!) and formula can be pricey, again coupons! but she was on food pretty early, I think around 4 months pretty steady and even before that here and there. Baby cereal since about 2 months in an infa feeder. You can feed your baby (once they can eat) anything you eat as long as you mash it good, potatoes, macaroni, etc. I rarely bought baby food. just too expensive. Keep in mind every baby eats at different ages. Mine did everything early. Had her first tooth at 2 months. Check with your doctor. Don't panic. Baby's don't require as much as people think they do. A good crib is a must though. Google or yahoo baby samples and you would be amazed at how many samples you can receive! get all you can.

[mom-from-missouri]

I think excluding childcare, my babies probably ran me less than $50 a month. I breastfed all of them--no formula. (and at the same time-#1 was still 1 when the twins were born, so I was nursing 3 for awhile.) Look into places like the LaLeche League for info. But, I still needed to buy a pump and bottles. I worked 12 hr night shifts then, 2-3 days a week. I was able to pump at work on my breaks and freeze it to go to daycare. (when they were real little we kept them home as they slept when I slept but at about 5 months they went to daycare when I worked or slept) I just got the cheap plastic bottles and pumped into them. When the babies were ready for solids, they ate basically what we ate. I just cooked theirs seperate, no spices or salt added, and ran it thru the blender. Friends saved me their baby food jars and at times I would buy veggies in bulk and process and freeze it for them. I sent that to daycare also. We used cloth diapers at home, and usually at daycare also.
You will need things like a carseat, bed, and high chair, but you can often find them from friends, family or used. Just be sure to check out the items for safety features-esp the carseat. Some counties even have programs that you can check out a carseat, like a library. Check into your local extension center or even family services to enquire on that-if there is such in your area, they would be the 2 groups to know about it.
If you stay home, tons of clothes are not necessary. My kids were given so many at showers that, sad to say, some were never worn. Take back if you get too many and exchange them for clothing in bigger sizes. There are lots of free things for momma and baby to do. Reading is one of them, long walks. Little ones often have more fun with the empty box than the toy-my girls loved putting juice can tops into a coffee can or oatmeal box-over and over and over-ignoring the high priced toys.
Lots of baby stuff is not necessary-such as a changing table. I always changed mine in their bed or on a pad on the floor after they got wiggly. Their baths were in the kitchen sink at first, then when they got bigger I put a large piece of foam in the bottom of the tub and laid them on that. Never did use one of those fancy baby tubs.
Start buying some stuff ahead of time, and make sure it is stuff that is not seasonal-such as a rocking chair, high chair...onsies, diapers...and you will be prepared. On diapers, if you get cloth, don't get the prefold-baby outgrows them. Get the ones you fold so you can just fold them different as baby gets bigger. Study up on it and you'll be fine.

[vishenda]

wow Im learning a lot from this discussion, mothers keep on sharing!

[Marcymox]

The real expenses come later in a child's life. You can have an extremely frugal life with a small child. Cloth diapers, b-feed, ect. Clothes for a baby are so cheap, and simple.

The costs are things that add up later- band, swim team, gifted courses, remedial tutoring,summer school instrument rental, clothes for chorus, scout uniforms, yearbooks, lab fees. I could type for hours and still not cover all the unpredicatables that come with older kids. Basically each year gets more expensive as your kids get older. I found the baby years the cheapest. I got hand me downs galore, and your nursery and supplies are only as expensive as you make it. some people spend 200.oo for matching crib sets!

Your main costs the first few years of life will be formula, a diapering system, and daycare.

[skinnybudget]

I think you can really go as low or high as you see fit. When DS was a baby we had a lot of gifts from showers (registered for gifts) and hand me downs and we bought a sling and cloth diapers. The sling cost us $40 and the cloth diapers about $300 (added up from birth to potty training), but you can go anywhere from $150+ on cloth diapers and you can get a used sling for $10-20. Luckily our insurance covered all medical expenses 100% and I breastfed exclusively. DS started solids at about 10 mos and we never bought him any special food. He never needed whole milk because he breastfed well into toddlerhood and whenever we wanted something pricier for him we asked for them at gift giving occasions. We didn't buy a crib, crib bedding, etc because he slept with us and we got things like a swing, exersaucer, bouncy seat, etc as gifts or hand me downs.

Now does this mean that we spent a total of $340 for the first year or so? No, occasionally we bought him clothes and toys, and there are expenses like tylenol, prescription co-pays, extra laundry, extra utilities, gas, more convenience foods and take out for us when we were too exhausted to cook...but who really keeps total track? When you have a baby the baby slowly becomes part of the family and a lot of things just get put into family expenses. Things like clothes and toys can be minimal, especially at the beginning! Babies don't know if they have new or used clothes and they're much happier playing with an empty box and a tupperware container than with the flashy educational toy. And garage saleing is really fun! I think that once we get to school age (in the fall!) I will really notice more expenses though.

Also, I stay home so I save a lot of money on myself because I don't need a lot of clothes and other expenses related to working outside the home. With my earning potential I basically would have been working to pay for childcare AND I wanted to stay home. Since I'm home we save a lot of money on food (have time to cook) and we have one car that we only need to use occasionally (DH bikes). When DS was younger we had tons of playdates at each other's homes, library trips, outings to the parks, all of which are free! So for us and a lot of my friends with kids, the years up to pre-K/Kindy are really flexible as far as costs.

[Broken Arrow]

Just for the sake of the conversation, I think it's worth pointing out that even if one is able to keep the cost down (which is a very good thing to do), you'll still take a large hit in income with either having the mother stay at home, or having to pay for daycare. Sure, one may be more financially feasible than the other (and thus be considered as a savings), but either way is still a large hit to your overall cashflow.

This won't apply to every household, but it did with mine and it will also apply to the original poster who brought up this subject. Fortunately, pearlieq has already taken this into consideration, but again, it's still worth mentioning.

The good news is, in the end, children can't be measure by its monetary cost alone, and thick or thin, we all manage somehow.

[Snoopy2645]

Thiers alot to consider money wise but sounds like you know a little about what your getting into already my advice is too go garage saling while pg & get as much as you can once baby comes you may not feel like it. Other is once they get older consider school lunches & with 3 growing girls myself they eat alot I cant even imagine boys!!!

Kids & babies are so worth thier expense though oh ya & if your kids have braces or glasses so far I only have 1 with glasses that cost around $100 a month for new lenses & eye visits oh ya & we paid alot driving her to drs visits out of town & she had 2 surgries probably spent well over 5k on her eyes that includes the motel rooms & eating out too!!! But she is not cross eyed & her vision has improved so its well worth it her eyes are priceless!!! Oh ya & when they are first born thier hospital cost we just paid like $30 a month tell it was paid we did the same w/ the childrens hospital.

So thier are hidden costs but they are very very well worth IMO